Grieving: Way beyond what you may think
Transition Aging Parents
by Dale
1y ago
This week I found myself back on the roller coaster of grief, 3 months after my husband’s death.  Why did I think I was ever off it?  Grief is something I often feel I have great gasp of and then no grasp at all! It brings to my mind my first rafting trip this past summer.  I listened to all the instructions, climbed in successfully, was somewhat apprehensive and then we took off.   It felt good to get past the first rapids.  I didn’t fall off.  But with barely enough time to reflect on that experience, another rapids and another and another.  Coming fa ..read more
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Grieving and the Yellow Butterfly
Transition Aging Parents
by Dale
1y ago
I’ve been quiet about my grieving after my husband passed away in September, following a 5 year illness with Parkinson’s & Lewy Body dementia. I have shared personally with friends & family but have not written about it for others to read. Today, I want to share with you. Friends often ask, very well meaning, how are you doing? Especially now during the holidays, how are you doing? Most of what I have felt since Bill’s passing is peace & love. I think a big part of that is I was with Bill at the moment he took his last breath. I was “standing with him” on his hometown beach when h ..read more
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Lifeline for Caregivers: Respite Care is now a Medicare benefit
Transition Aging Parents
by Dale
1y ago
(Many thanks to our guest blogger, Danielle Kunkle.  She is the co-founder of Boomer Benefits, an insurance agency specializing in Medicare-related insurance products. They help baby boomers new to Medicare learn about their benefits and coverage options across 47 states.) How does Medicare and Respite Care Works? Being a full-time caregiver can be both challenging and exhausting. There is so much that goes into being the primary caretaker of someone that is either terminally ill or disabled that many people don’t recognize. It’s a full-time job with very few breaks. That’s why ..read more
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How to prepare for an outing with a loved one with advanced dementia
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
My husband Bill has always loved trains.  He built a 40 foot model train layout in our Indiana basement, a labor of love for over 30 years.  So when friends told me about the 90 minute excursion ride on the Georgetown Loop Railroad, I knew I had to make it happen for Bill!  We live west of Denver, less than an hour away from the train station.  So it was not a matter of if, but when we would go! I knew preparation prior to the event was key, but I later learned preparation for after the event is just as important!  Read on to hear about our journey… I selected a ..read more
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Most Critical Skill for Family Caregivers
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
We all know caregiving is complex.  So much to learn, so much to do and so little time.  This may surprise you.  But, through personal experience, I believe the most critical skill for a caregiver, regardless of diagnosis, is good communication.  Understand that effective communication will always be a work in progress, a goal to strive towards. You, as the family caregiver, are the super-connector for all your loved one’s physicians, service providers as well as family members and friends who care. At times, you will feel as if you’re being pulled in 100 different directio ..read more
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5 ways to communicate with a loved one living with dementia
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
(Many thanks to our guest blogger, Jane Mullins, for sharing her wonderful insight into effective, empathetic communication with loved one with dementia.  Jane is Freelance Dementia Nurse Consultant, Author & Researcher.  Her new book is “Finding The Light in Dementia.”) One of the biggest challenges of dementia is that it can affect a person’s ability to speak and communicate their needs. This must be so frustrating for the person and for their loved ones. Often people withdraw from social circles as the effort to convey their needs and ways of getting their voice hea ..read more
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Family Caregiver: Building Your Care Partner Team
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
I want to talk about a very important concept, building your “care partner team.” It is far too easy to think as a spouse (or primary family caregiver) facing caregiving … “I can do it all” or “I have to do it all”. You know I always loved that song by Helen Reddy, “You and Me Against the World.” But that is absolutely NOT the right perspective. You will burn out AND loved one will miss out on the caring, love, expertise and rich relationships with others. Building your care partner team is vital. Ours include a wonderful adult day program (two days a week), our adult children (livi ..read more
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Caregivers Need Care, too
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
(Many thanks to our guest blogger, Lydia Chan, for sharing her wonderful insight for caregivers.  Self-care is not optional.  It can be life saving!)  November isn’t only a time for thanks, it’s also National Family Caregivers and National Alzheimer’s Awareness Month. And as those who care for Alzheimer’s patients are aware, it’s is a terrible disease that takes a toll not only on the sufferer but on their families as well. Caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s is a full-time job. It is a thankless and exhausting labor of love and one that many caregivers are unwilling t ..read more
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How to Stay Sane and Healthy as a Caregiver Spouse
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
As caregiver spouse for my husband (with Parkinson’s and Lewy Body dementia),  I want to share a few of my key “lessons learned.”  I wrote this “still relevant” list in another blogpost 2 years ago.  Amazing how timeless these lessons are. As a caregiver, recognize that you will ride an emotional roller-coaster. There were moments of feeling blessed for receiving an early diagnosis and then times of despair as I realized that our future had changed forever. Recognize that while there may be no cure for a loved one’s diagnosis, we each can choose our response to the situation. I ..read more
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It’s Time to Have a Conversation About Your Health Care Decisions
Transition Aging Parents
by dale
1y ago
(Many thanks to our guest blogger Laura E. Bender, a Ph.D. student in health services research at the University of Washington School of Medicine.) Conversations about the end of your life can be scary, sad or awkward. But these conversations also can be comfortable. A few years ago, on a flight from Denver to Philadelphia, the woman seated on my left asked me what I did for work. I assumed my response would kill the sociable dynamic of our conversation if I didn’t choose my words carefully. I’m a palliative care researcher and, at the time, I was reading detailed patient death notes in m ..read more
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