Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable Z is for Zen and the Art of Life Review Zen is a state of mind of being fully present, free from the constraints of the ego, and open to the wisdom of the universe. It is a state of pure awareness. A life review is a procedure for reconstructing our pasts in a manner that can provide three personal benefits that many of us need as we grow older: An acceptance of the events and choices that have shaped our lives, reflecting gratitude for the life we’ve been given rather than self-doubt and regret. A more authentic (and thus more robust) understand ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable Y is for Youth is Overrated Julia Louis-Dreyfus Thinks Youth Is Overrated New York Times By Jancee Dunn March 30, 2024 When Julia Louis-Dreyfus hit her 60s, she was struck by a realization: She wanted to hear from the old ladies. The star of “Seinfeld” and “Veep,” who has nearly a dozen Emmys, was in the “second act” of her life. But she was contemplating her third. She said she craved the sort of wisdom that only comes from age. Yes, she received advice from her mother, but where was everyone else? “We’re certainly not in the habit of listening to ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable X is for eXit life      . . . older persons tend to fear death less than the young, and many can accept the idea of personal death with equanimity. At times it represents a welcome relief from the pain of a terminal illness. In other situations, older persons feel they are ready, they have lived out their lives and are able to let go. Strong religious or philosophical convictions can be of immense comfort in the process of dying. Attitudes toward death give clues as to the life that has been lived, reflecting the problems, reso ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable W is for Walking My mother didn’t drive. Her younger brother took her out one day to teach her. I envision it was in the 1920s. Maybe they had a Ford Model T. I suspect they were in a field near the family potato farm on Long Island. The way she told it, my Uncle Joey jumped out of the car because she was such an erratic driver. She never drove after that. And she didn’t need to. As a young adult, she lived and worked in Brooklyn, used the subway to get around. When she married my father, they relocated to Jersey City, NJ to be near Dad’s Italian f ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable V is for Vegetation Even though I’ve been retired over 20 years, I still appreciate my lazy mornings. There are two brief time periods between the frost of winter and heat of summer when I can sit outside on the screened porch, my feet up on an ottoman, reading the news on my computer, a cup of black coffee on the side table by my wicker chair. Outside, the vegetation on the patch of earth at the back and side of our townhouse entertains me with pleasant distractions. Earlier in the month, our homeowner’s association took down three large pine tree ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, the Tolerable U is for University Diversity The Harvey A. Friedman Center for Aging at the Washington University in St. Louis has been looking at institutions across the country to see what they are doing to increase age inclusive campuses. It is so exciting to think institutes of higher learning working on diversity, equality, and inclusion (DEI) would add older folks to the mix. I am aware that university DEI programs have been a hot political topic of late. (They are here in North Carolina). Ignoring this problem for the moment, my excitement centers around the f ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable T is for Three Good Things When I was a volunteer at Duke University Hospital right after I retired, Dr. J Bryan Sexton, director of the Patient Safety Center lectured our group about Three Good Things. Three Good Things, also called Three Blessings, was a tool he used to decrease burnout among hospital staff. The staff documented, at the end of the day, three things that went well. After a two week intervention, the staff reported a 40% drop in depression and 22% decrease in burnout that was sustained one year later. Three Good Things “trains” us ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable S is for Successful Aging Live Long, Die Short, A Guide to Authentic Health and Successful Aging by Roger Landry, MD, MPH The information in this book is based on the findings of a ten-year study from the MacArthur Foundation’s Research Network on Successful Aging. The study found “how we age is determined more by our everyday lifestyle choices than our genes.” Here are the ten tips to achieve authentic health and successful aging: Tip 1:  Use It or Lose It We must consistently use the physical, emotional, and social skills we wish to keep as ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable R is for Regret Regret, one of the ghosts of aging, comes upon us one day dressed up like wisdom, looking profound and serious, sensible and responsible. It prods us to begin to look back. It presses us to question everything we’ve ever done: I should have listened to my mother…; I should have stayed in school…; I should have waited to get married..; I should have majored in something else…; I should have changed jobs…; I should have spent more time with the children, with the family, at home…; I should have gone away from this place, this town ..read more

Aging: The Good, the Bad, and the Tolerable Q is for Quality of Life Quality of life (QOL) is the degree to which a person is healthy, comfortable, and able to participate in or enjoy special occasions and life activities. It is critical for health care professionals to take quality of life into account when establishing each patient’s goals of care and to use it as a guide for all care decisions. Merck Manual Quality of life means something different to each person. To Marv Roelofs, it meant not getting treatment for an aggressive lung cancer that would kill him in a matter of weeks. He d ..read more