Todd and Kristin Evans know that tending to marriage while raising a child with disabilities can be challenging. About 12 years ago after their medically fragile daughter arrived, they decided to give their marriage one more shot before admitting defeat. In their new book How to Build a Thriving Marriage as You Care for Children with Disabilities, they invite parents to join them on a journey toward wholeness in marriage, parenting, and faith. Early in our marriage, we discovered building a strong marriage can be difficult. But when our medically complex daughter was born, we began to fac ..read more

Play a Game Taking a mini vacation to play a game can distract your mind, make you laugh, lower your stress level, and improve your emotions. Avoid feeling guilty for taking this time out for your mental health. Find time today to play a game on your phone, a card game like solitaire, or a game with someone else. Have fun! Dr. Todd and Kristin Evans are celebrating 22 years of marriage. They are award-winning authors, speakers, and parents of two children with complex needs. Their new book, How to Build a Thriving Marriage as You Care for Children with Disabilities will release i ..read more

Gratitude List Thinking about everyone on our shopping lists can stress us out. All the gifts we need to buy or make, some that we are purchasing out of duty, others with emotional strings attached. Yet, when we pause to practice gratitude, our perspective can change, our mood improve, and our stress lower. Creating a gratitude list in addition to our gifting list can bring us more joy this holiday season. Try this: Pull out your shopping and gift list. For each person, also write next to their name one reason why you’re grateful for them. If you pray, thank God for each person and offer up t ..read more

Favorite Holiday Scent Pausing to do deep breathing while smelling a pleasant scent can help soothe your mind, calm your emotions, and lower your stress level. Take 5 minutes to try this activity and see how you feel afterwards. Think about your favorite holiday scents. These are a few examples: Cinnamon Peppermint Cloves Evergreens Ginger Baking cookies Citrus Take a couple of minutes to practice deep breathing while enjoying the scent. You might go to the spice rack, light a candle, use an essential oil, turn on your diffuser, or enjoy hot tea. Smile before returning to your day. Dr. T ..read more

Creating unique, disability-friendly traditions may feel like one more task to add to your holiday to do list. These ideas from guest blogger Kristin are anything but one more thing. In fact, her ideas will simplify some of what you’re already doing and give you permission to let other things go. It can be easy to feel pressure from family, friends, or work to participate in typical holiday activities. But usual Christmas traditions and gatherings can be challenging for families with special needs. Taking a child with medical needs or developmental disabilities to loud, large, or crowded place ..read more

Give Yourself a Break All the energy that you’ve spent gearing up for the holidays and the added stressors and responsibilities may have caused you to feel tired or let down. You might feel like you need to reset. So, give yourself permission to take a break by using one of these ideas. We are on our last day of learning and using simple and easy ways to cope, lower your stress levels, and practice self-care. If you missed the other posts, no problem! Jump in today and use these quick tools to lower your stress and improve your mood throughout the New Year. Choose any of the previous 29 days a ..read more

Observe with Your Senses One way to help you lower your stress levels and improve your emotions is to intentionally observe with all of your senses. Try this: Pause and close your eyes. Take a slow deep cleansing breath. What do you hear? Smell? Feel? Open your eyes and look around. What do you see? Taste? Take another deep breath. Return to fully participating in each moment. Dr. Todd and Kristin Evans are celebrating 22 years of marriage. They are award-winning authors, speakers, and parents of two children with complex needs. Their new book, How to Build a Thriving Marriage as Yo ..read more

Lemon Squeeze Disability parents experience significantly higher levels of stress and even more so during the holidays. Tensing and relaxing your muscles can help calm your brain and emotions. An easy way to practice this exercise is to grab a lemon, stress ball, or pretend you have one in your hand. Try this: Grab a lemon out of the fridge, find a stress ball, or just use your hand and pretend you’re holding a lemon. Take the lemon in your right hand and squeeze as hard as you can for 30 seconds. Suddenly drop the lemon. Take the lemon in your left hand and repeat steps 2 and 3. Notice how y ..read more

Drop Perfectionism When we try to do and make everything perfect, we increase our stress levels and our risk for developing depression and anxiety. Perfection isn’t possible for anyone, but especially for parents caring for children with additional needs. There’s just too much to do, and more can always be done. This holiday season, give yourself a break and let some things go. Reflect on situations that are stressing you out and ask yourself these questions: Are there ways you can spend less time and energy on either those tasks or some other tasks? In what ways might you be trying to please ..read more

Giving a Voice to Your Grief You may feel many different emotions during the holidays including grief. This is common for special needs parents. Giving a voice to your grief will help decrease the intensity of the emotions. At the same time, allow yourself to feel positive emotions and stay in the present moment. When you notice a painful emotion or thought, try to avoid pushing it away. Instead, be curious about why you are feeling this way. Allow yourself to feel the painful emotion. Validate your emotions. It makes sense that you’re feeling this way. Be kind to yourself like you would to a ..read more