1.My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!” They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals. 2.The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me. 3.I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive ..read more

Hello, I’m the VGC God and Chat Comedian. I will post chat comedy here: Here’s VGC Chat Music: SoundCloud.com/Snacker_Trollston ..read more

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Did you hear about the cannibal @Princessa. who cloned himself as @Princessa to see what he would taste like? It made him sh*t himself ..read more

@Princessa Yo Momma so stupid she sits and the tv and watches the couch ..read more

This beautiful woman @purplerose one day walks into doctor @ryrytime office and is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window... He tells her to take her pants off, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs. "Do you know what I am doing?" asks doctor @ryrytime ? "Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies. He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. Then doctor @ryrytime begins... Read more ..read more

There were three nuns, @Lisblanc @Kim and @Tami01 they all told the priest @TheDifference that they were going to do one sin each. So @TheDifference says ok, do your sins, come back, and I'll bless you. So, they went to do their sins and came back to get blessed. @TheDifference asked @Lisblanc was laughing what her sin was. She said, "I had sex with a guy." @TheDifference said ok, blessed her and said go drink some holy water. So... Read more ..read more

@Akrta goes to her boyfriend @ryrytime parents’ house for dinner. This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. She is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty little fart. It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard the... Read more ..read more

Drop it in water. If it sinks it's girl ant If it floats... It's BOUYANT ..read more

A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW. “Officer, look what they’ve done to my Beemer!” he whined. “You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!” retorted the officer, “You’re so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn’t even notice that your left arm was ripped... Read more ..read more