I am a rational person who embraces science and I believe in the resurrection.  Let’s start again. I AM a rational person. I can hear my husband laughing right now as I type these words, because he’s seen me lose my cool once or twice. Ignore his laughter; I am rational! Example: when I worry about my kids contracting some horrible childhood illness, I look up the statistical likelihood of someone actually getting that illness. Then, I embrace the rational numbers and move on with my day.   When it comes to my faith, I also tend to be level headed. I don’t get hung up on virgi ..read more

There’s nothing like a bloody, anguished Jesus to ruin your religious experience as a child. Did I just say that out loud? Yes I did. If you need to read the above sentence again, please do.  On the cusp of Bad Friday (you might refer to it as Good Friday, but no day a human dies on a cross should be remembered as a good day), I would like to share a very powerful and haunting story from a childhood trauma survivor. This survivor describes their parent as a monster. As a child, they remember peering at the wretched crucifix in their church, Sunday after Sunday. They remember vividly knee ..read more

There is a new word I’m hearing a lot these days: deconstruction. As in, I am deconstructing my faith. I’m working with my therapist to deconstruct my past. My favorite, that you might only hear on campuses: I’ve been reading a lot about the impact of colonialism and trying to deconstruct the history I was taught. Try that line at a dinner party and see what happens! Deconstruction feels like a big word. But it’s not really a complicated word. It simply means to break something down. Think of it in terms of Legos. You probably built a Lego creation as a kid. Years passed and you no longer ne ..read more

No Room. Every Christmas Eve service we heard: because there was no room for them at the inn. Flashing hotel signs filled our minds as children. We might have imagined an overcrowded city or no place for Joseph and Mary because back then there were no call ahead reservations. For goodness sakes they rode to Bethlehem on a donkey; of course there were no phones.  We were misled. The New Revised Standard Version has updated their translation; now Luke 2:7 reads: because there was no place in the guest room. Joseph’s extended family was from Bethlehem. They could have slept in someone’s ..read more

Disclaimer: This blog may feel a whole lot more about me than about the saint I would like to celebrate: Tonya. This may be true. If you can, bear with me. The only way I can express the impact this every day saint has had on the world is through my own experience, particularly what I learned about myself in her presence.  And for Tonya: Thank you for letting me share this. How often I pray for you.  Tonya and I began Colgate University in the fall of 1994. We had both made it to our first year at college on our own merits you could argue, but looking back I see now what different ..read more

This covid-19 shit is real. Yes shit. To be exact: shit show. We call it a shit show at church. Shit show because there were no other words.  What are the right words when it comes to a pandemic on top of everything else?  The list is long.  Forest fires rage.  Poverty accelerates with rising unemployment just behind.  And we haven't even mentioned #black lives matter.  Just this week a black man was shot 7 times in the back while his children watched.  Say his name: Jacob Blake.  It was with these heavy hearts that we gathered on Zoom.  Not outsi ..read more

​Tribe. That’s the word my husband has been using a lot lately as we discuss the world. We are all divided into our own ethnic, socio-economic, political, and religious tribes. Others use the word silo,  but I think this refers more to the limited interaction individuals have with others outside of their social media “tribe.” Truth be told, in our global world, different tribes bump up against each other constantly in the marketplace, voting booth, school, and even home. Tribes are, for a lack of a better word, “tribal.” Tribes tend to be fiercely protective of their identity,  cele ..read more

Yep, that’s right, PRIDE is a Christian Holiday! What authority do I have to make that pronouncement? About the same authority the early Christian church did when they proclaimed Jesus was born on December 25th, which also happened to be the rival Sun-God’s birthday. I also claim the same authority the early Protestant church did when they regularly celebrated Reformation Sunday at the end of October. The question isn’t really if I can decide PRIDE is a Christian holiday. The question is: Why don’t all Christian churches celebrate people as their authentic selves? Why do some Christian church ..read more

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he Reasons I do not want to remain a Christian The Patriarchy. Enough said. Really… Check out how strong a hold the patriarchy has on the Christian church compared to secular society. It’s pretty egregious. If  a woman wants to be a doctor, electrician, fighter pilot, principal, farmer, or senator, she can be in this country. If she wants to be a pastor, the vast majority of Christian churches in America would not welcome her leadership. She can be a Sunday school teacher, a youth worker, but not a preacher. Spare me.  White Evangelicals. They spend most of their time telling every ..read more