I was having a bit of a board storm with my boss at NCDV the other day about our mission statement, which is to make domestic abuse socially unacceptable. I have always preferred this to those that say they want to end domestic abuse because I just don’t think that is realistic. My boss asked me why I don’t think domestic abuse can be eradicated/ended/stopped? I found I didn’t really know how to answer him! And I have been thinking about it ever since. So I thought it may be useful help me if I did a little board storm of my own on here! What shall we start with? I am sure we all have loads of ..read more

There has been a lot in the news in the last couple of days about an announcement by the UK’s Justice Secretary, Alex Chalk. This announcement was to say that to try and tackle overcrowding in prisons, ‘low level’ prisoners could be released up to 2 months early. People who have been convicted of terrorist offences, violent offences and sex offences, and have been sentenced to over 4 years or more will be exempt/excluded from these plans BUT domestic abuse perpetrators are not exempt! Seeing that domestic abuse perpetrators commit the latter two of the above, this is really concerning news. We ..read more

As some of you will know, Jamaica is a place that is very close to my heart, being my late husband’s heritage and somewhere I have travelled to and stayed many times with my mother in law. I have long been aware that the prevalence of domestic abuse on the island is very high. The results of the first national survey on gender based violence in Jamaica in 2018, shows a prevalence rate of 27.8%, with in every 4 women in Jamaica, experiencing intimate partner violence in their lifetime. But as in the UK, I suspect the number to be far higher. The Domestic Violence (Amendment) Act, 2023, came int ..read more

Firstly, my apologies for the gap in writing. I have been in hospital, but rest assured, whilst in there, I was making notes and thinking about all of you and when I could get back to writing. Thank you for your patience. So, for those of you that live in the UK, you will have to have been living under a rock not to know about the recent domestic abuse incident that was reported on by national media and the like. For the avoidance of doubt, and for those of you not in the UK, here is the ‘story’. Clapham chemical attack: Everything we know so far | UK News | Sky News Except, yet again, it has ..read more

Time to Talk Day.  What is it?  I had never heard of it until recently.  Turns out, it is held every year and is run by Mind and Rethink Mental Illness and is in partnership with the Co-Op.  This year it is being observed on the 1st February in the UK. Time to Talk Day aims to encourage everyone to be more open and talk about mental health.  The words ‘mental health’ still carry so much stigma.  A bit like the words domestic abuse, and I have been thinking how the two can be linked in a positive way. Talking about mental health can sometimes feel awkward and uncom ..read more

Warning signs. I have been thinking about these a lot lately. What are they? Why do we ignore them? (And we do. We all do at least once after experiencing an abusive relationship). I thought it may be helpful to go through the early warning signs of an abusive person. I do this as a whole session at the end of The Freedom Programme. Except the first one – Love Bombing. This is one I have personally observed many times and I think this happens first! So let’s have a look at the sorts of things we can expect to see and then I will write about why I think we ignore them! How about that? Of cour ..read more

Been thinking today and I wanted to share my thoughts with you all. As I took all the Christmas decorations down wondering why the hell I put them up in the first place as I am here on my own! I was thinking, work will be busy this week coming. It always is. I always feel a bit strange this time of year, and obviously, this year I feel especially strange! But that is another story! Everyone that works in the Domestic Abuse field knows that it is really very quiet in the run up to Christmas and then from about the 3rd or 4th of January – BOOM!! It is like a mass exodus of victims and ..read more

The Domestic Abuse Protection Order (DAPO) is a significant legal measure introduced by the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 in the United Kingdom. The pilot of the new DAPO is due to start in the New Year in Gwent, Greater Manchester and three of the London boroughs – Croydon, Bromley and Sutton. What is the purpose of a DAPO? The purpose of a DAPO is to provide immediate and long-term protection for victims and survivors of domestic abuse. It will offer more comprehensive safeguards than current orders contain, thus better protecting victims and survivors. How will it work? There are two components t ..read more

So, firstly, please allow me to apologise for not being in touch for a while longer than usual. I am ok! I have just been incredibly busy at my day job at the National Centre for Domestic Violence (NCDV). It is always busy at this time of year. The 25th November is the first day of the 16 days of activism against gendered violence. The 25 November, being the first day and the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, and the last day which is the 10 December, being Human Rights Day.  Every domestic abuse organisation in the UK always tries to do something to mark th ..read more

The UK government has introduced new statutory guidance about the definition of coercive control. For parents that use child maintenance to control or coerce their former partners, this could now mean facing prosecution. Many of you reading this blog will know that not paying child maintenance or not paying it regularly is a very common form of economic abuse that happens after the relationship has ended. It is a tool used to further control and coerce the victims/survivor and can have a massive effect on not just the victims but also the children of the family. If the victim/survivor isn’t ge ..read more