​On Friday, June 28, 2024, I spent my first night at my new home, and as I type this, in my guest bedroom/office, on the desk I built myself, I’m mostly moved in.   For me, the “setting up the new area” is the fun part.  I had a tough time getting motivated to put in my bedsheets after spending most of the day working with the movers, but hey, I had to sleep somewhere, right?  The Internet installers weren’t scheduled to come in until the next morning, so I spent the night horizontal on the couch, watching a DVD of Jimi Hendrix’s Woodstock performance on my laptop.   Once t ..read more

​Moving into a new home as a SALA (Single and Living Alone) is freeing, but man oh man, is it exhausting!  You do everything yourself.    And so the International Singles Studies Association Conference couldn’t have come at a better time.  The train ride to Boston was uneventful, just how I like it.  And those solo train trips – I can’t get enough of those.  Reading (I Don’t: The Case Against Marriage) and viewing (the pro-single Muriel’s Wedding) also made the trip fun.   After a wonky sleep at the Airbnb, the alarm on the phone told me it was 6 a.m. and ti ..read more

​I’m typing this from my closer-to-empty apartment, eight days away from officially moving.  And the past month has been like “basic training” with respect to repairs, which is par for the course for a homeowner.   About a month ago, the light bulb from a fixture in my kitchen went out.  All I needed to do was pull up the building’s app on my phone, fill in the order, and 24 hours later, it was done.  Since I have recessed lights that are meant to last for ten years, that’s probably not an issue.  But, if my refrigerator, for example, happens to go, I can’t just pull u ..read more

​My cat/son Chester’s been an integral part of my life for the past eight years.  I post about him often he’s pretty much CoSP’s mascot.  People don’t think of me without thinking of him.  Whenever I sign birthday/graduation/event cards, I sign them “Craig and Chester.”  So to move to a home without him was, well, unfathomable, to put it mildly.   And I was disappointed to see so many places during my search that didn’t allow pets.  I saw a place that checked every box on my list (close to Metro, two bedrooms, larger than my DC apartment) but when I heard pet-free ..read more

​Well, I officially understand the phrase “trial by fire,” as it applies to my first week of homeownership.  It was a grueling week, but I did learn a lot.   Saturday I began to take measurements and devise ideas on how to design my living space.  Sunday was what Appalachian Trail thru-hikers call a “zero day;” I enjoyed a nice crab cake lunch with my friend Courtney at the Waterfront, my second-favorite place in DC (first is Adams Morgan).    Monday was the day I had set up with contractors I’m calling the big three: a painter, an electrician, a plumber.  Jason s ..read more

​With the rise of singles has come the increase in single homebuyers/homeowners.  According to most recent data I read, “Forty-two percent of millennials have purchased a home alone, compared to 34 percent of Gen Xers (ages 44-59) and 22 percent of baby boomers (ages 60-78).”  As of May 17, 2024, I am now one of that 34 percent.   Being single has given me the flexibility to have a career that’s taken me across the United States: El Paso for my doctorate, southeast Virginia for my first academic job, and DC for a better academic job, which offered me tenure.  And while bein ..read more

​“And we’re the three best friends that anybody could have, we’re the three best friends that anybody could have, and we’ll never ever ever ever ever leave each other…”   When I think of The Hangover, my mind immediately jumps to Alan’s ode to his “wolf pack.”  While said members of the pack probably don’t reciprocate his feelings, it brings to mind how powerful friendship can be.    This is the central tenet of Rhaina Cohen’s new book, The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center (I’ll use the acronym OSO for the rest of this post), in which ..read more

This essay was presented at the Northeast Modern Language Association Conference in Boston, Massachusetts on March 8, 2024.  It is a first draft of a personal essay I hope to submit to a publication. “Being single as an adult” were the words I typed into that Google search bar that humid Tuesday afternoon.  I had recently been broken up with, yet again, and the anger perforated throughout my body.  I was thirty-six, had completed my first year in a tenure-track position at a university, and had never been married.  Basically, there was something wrong with me.  “You n ..read more

This paper was delivered at the Northeast Modern Language Association Conference at the Sheraton Hotel, Boston, Massachusetts on March 7, 2024.  It is a first draft and part of a much larger project. Introduction   We love romance.  We love it on a structural level, as married couples are given privilege in laws and policies throughout the world.  We love it on a spiritual principal, as marriage and other forms of coupling are often referred to as “holy unions.”  We also love it on our popular culture consumption.  Movies and television series often end with char ..read more

​“I’m addicted to NeMLA.” So said Moises, the moderator of the panel during which I read a first draft of a personal essay, “Single Does Not Mean Bad: On Embracing One’s Own Lone Wolf Tendencies.”  And I’d think it’s safe to say I am too.  Elizabeth and I moderated a Singles Studies panel for the third year in a row, and we had some great presentations.  From one, I got inspired to check out Bridesmaids; apparently, there’s a pro-single spin I just didn’t see in my initial viewing of the film.  And some anger-inducing political rhetoric presented by Elizabeth (gotta love t ..read more