SWM 125 – Rethinking “Duty Sex”
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
5d ago
I've had a lot of conversations with couples as well as husbands and wives individually lately about what often gets called "duty sex" or "pity sex." For those who don't know, duty/pity sex is when one spouse gives in to sex, not because they desire it themselves, but because their spouse does. They might have sex for many reasons, including feeling obligated, pressured, guilty, to keep the peace or to "get them off their back."The problem is that these negative reasons are often the only ones considered, and so any situation in which one spouse wants sex and the other agrees to it without hav ..read more
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SWM 124 – My daughter’s speech – A vaccine against the epidemic of transgenderism
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
2w ago
Today I've got something a bit different than the usual fare. Last year, for our 100th episode, I had my eldest daughter present her 4H speech as I felt it fit the scope of this blog. This year, she wrote a part 2. She won at her local club, and placed second at districts. So, we thought we'd record a version for the podcast again. Rather than give away any of the speech, I'll just let you read it. If you do want to go back you can read the first speech here ..read more
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SWM 123 – AQ – Enjoying anal sex, periods and vacation, aging and orgasms, fantasizing, and condoms for handjobs
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
2w ago
Topics include: The monthly masturbation challenge How do I make anal sex enjoyable for her? Periods and vacations and sex Aging and orgasm struggles How do I know if I’m in right? Does fantasizing about my husband make it a shared experience? Condoms for handjobs Resources for newlywed virgins ..read more
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SWM 122 – How to make your spouse more attractive to you
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
3w ago
If you look online, you can find tons of videos, articles, podcasts, products and more about how to make yourself more attractive to your spouse or potential partners. I mean, it's everywhere. You can also find resources to help you make your spouse more attractive by changing them. What you don't see much of, though, are resources to help you change your mindset to make them seem more attractive to you without changing them. We all know the phrase "beauty is in the eye of the beholder," but rarely, if ever, is it used to recognize that you, as the beholder, can change what you're attracted to ..read more
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SWM 121 – Why marriage should be hard work
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
1M ago
I made a post on social media some time ago saying, “Marriage is hard, divorce is hard, choose your hard,” and someone asked me if I then disagreed with some other bloggers and podcasters who say that marriage is and should be easy.  This post expands on what I wrote in response to that question ..read more
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SWM 120 – How you may be making your birth control methods ineffective
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
1M ago
A few years ago, I was talking to a client during a coaching call, and we got off on a bit of a tangent about condom use. I explained a few ways that people tend to lower the protection of condoms when they use them. He was, well, shocked because he'd done many of them and had no idea that every time he did that, he was increasing the chance of conception. And so, I've had this post idea on the back burner for quite a while until last week, when I mentioned in response to an anonymous question that if you don't want kids, you shouldn't have sex because even condoms and birth control are not pe ..read more
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SWM 119 – Vibrators & dildos, roleplay, talking to your kids about sex, and more
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
2M ago
Topics include: How do you use a vibrator? Is roleplaying marriage a sin? Will a dildo make me unsatisfied with my husband? Wife makes excuses about everything When to start talking to your kids about sex? Wife caught me watching porn Is masturbation without porn a sin ..read more
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SWM 118 – In sickness and in health
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
2M ago
The traditional wedding vows go something like "I take you to be my wife/husband, and I do promise and covenant, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful husband/wife in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live." Unfortunately, I don't remember my wedding vows. I remember picking some. I remember memorizing them. I remember reciting them, from memory, during the wedding, despite having the flu and a fever. But nearly 23 years later, I don't remember what they were. I'm sure they contained something like "in sicknes ..read more
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SWM 117 – Why do I want sex when I’m sick?
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
3M ago
Well, it’s winter here, which means cold and flu season.  So, of course, the last couple of weeks, it’s been rolling through our family of 7.  Christina and I were the last to get it, and it seemed I got it worse than her.  She complained about being sick but still working out multiple times daily (playing Supernatural on the VR - in case any others are fans).  For me, I was barely making it through my desk job and not making it some days. But at night, we’d crawl into bed, and I was still interested in sex, I think more than usual even - her, not at all.  That made me ..read more
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SWM 116 – Why do I always have to tell my husband how to help?
Sex Within Marriage Podcast : Exploring Married Sexuality from a Christian Perspective
by Jay Dee
4M ago
Lately, I've noticed a trend on social media where famous creator couples make videos of the wife telling the husband that visitors are coming over and they need to prepare. In response, the husband goes and starts cleaning out the attic and crawlspace, going through keepsakes, and performing other tasks that do little to achieve the intended goal of getting ready for guests. Of course, they're doing it as a light-hearted joke, but it points to a common conflict in marriages - women often feel they have to ask for the same help repeatedly. Even in the non-hyperbole versions of these videos, th ..read more
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