If you are going to divorce a narcissist, my survival guide will help you! Are you ready! Do you have what it takes? Come on! You can do it! And I can help… As a medically and psychcologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I have navigated successful divorces for spouses married to narcissists for decades. This is a particular area of expertise that most divorce attorneys don’t have! If you are divorcing a narcissist you will need courage and strength to fight for what you want and to successfully detach from a narcissist while securing a happier future. A narcissistic spouse will try ..read more

With Spring upon us, many couples are setting goals for change in the pursuit of happiness for themselves and their family. For some couples, the attainment of these objectives involves the dissolution of their marriage. However, with an eye on a brighter future and the fair distribution of marital assets the future of the most precious and valuable marital “asset” is often treated the most poorly: the children. As a psychologically trained divorce mediator and attorney for over 35 years, I have found that minor children are the subject of serious contention and are often used as pawns in mari ..read more

With the change of season almost here comes the deep desire to start getting rid of the old and bring in the new. Cleaning out the closets, getting organized, opening up the windows, and airing out the house. It feels good!! For those of you thinking about divorce, this is a productive time to get divorce-ready and organized. Here are Some Helpful Divorce Organization Tips: One of the questions I often get when we schedule a consultation is what documents do I need? That’s when people start scrambling to find all their paperwork. So…. 1. Locate and Organize Your Financial Documents a. make a l ..read more

Here is a paraphrase of an email I received a few months ago: Dear Lois, Can I speak with you a.s.a.p.? I am just about to give birth to my first child and my husband has announced he is leaving me for another woman. I suspected he was cheating and I was right! I feel sick! I just want to run away. I know I can’t. I don’t know what to do. Please help! -Laura- It really saddened me to see this email. And yes, of course I reached out and helped this lovely young woman. I am happy to report she has just given birth to a beautiful baby girl, and she and her husband are working out their divorce is ..read more

Have you wondered why you are always sad and feeling so bad? Do you think your marriage is making you depressed? Depression can make you feel tired and like you are living under a cloud. You have no interest in activities and have dark thoughts about yourself and others. As a psychologically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I hear from depressed spouses all the time. There are a lot of causes of depression but lack of power and abuse in a marriage can certainly cause depression. Some signs of an unhappy marriage range from minimizing each other’s feelings, having no sex, feeling neglecte ..read more

Many spouses expect divorce to be an ongoing battle, but as a seasoned New York divorce attorney/mediator, I tell many spouses it doesn’t have to be! There are constructive ways to tackle divorce and create a battle-free zone that is non-adversarial and more cost effective. An important part of the divorce process is developing an agreement with which you are both satisfied. This contract should cover everything that is necessary and important to you both, like custody of your children, support, maintenance, separate and marital property, division of your assets and personal property. There is ..read more

If a personality disorder is ruining your marriage, I am here to help. Is your marriage surrounded by chaos, hostility, conflict, frustration, and lots of drama? Are your efforts to improve the situation constantly ridiculed, shot down and ignored? As a medically and psychologically-trained divorce attorney and mediator for over 35 years, I can tell you there might be a lot more going on than just poor communication. It might be that your spouse has a personality disorder. There are several types of personality disorders: Obsessive-compulsive; Anti-social; Borderline; Paraniod; Narcisisstic ..read more

Divorce can be a difficult and an emotionally and financially draining process, especially for those who are a professional or in the public eye. As a medically/psychologically trained divorce attorney/mediator for over 35 years, I can tell you, divorce disputes can often be resolved more amicably through mediation. I got a call last week from a neurosurgeon who said during a consultation, “I hired an attorney and my wife and I have been tied up in divorce litigation for 2 years. Our case is going nowhere, we are spending a fortune on lawyers and my whole family is miserable. My wife and I wan ..read more

Attorney Lois Brenner was recently featured in a Brides article, "Considering a Prenup? Here's Everything You Need to Know". You can read the full article here ..read more

During a consultation a few weeks ago, I spoke with a woman in her 40s who tearfully explained she had lost control of her life. Her husband had always controlled the finances, even though she was part owner of their family business. She received a very small salary from the business and her husband paid all the bills. She never saw the bills and had no idea what was spent. Although they filed joint tax returns, she never saw the details of the returns. Her husband would just put them in front of her and say, “sign.” She had no idea what their business generated financially or about their savi ..read more