Becoming Truly Better Apart: Healing and Growth Through Divorce Embarking on your divorce journey can be a challenging and emotional.   Deciding to divorce, or realizing that you have no choice but to divorce comes with feelings of uncertainty, heartache, and even fear. While divorce is often sad, and the process may seem daunting, it can also be an opportunity for immense personal growth, healing, and a path to greater peace and happiness. As a divorce mediator, I have witnessed thousands of couples transition through the complexities of divorce. Throughout this journey, I have come to ..read more

Why Forgiveness Matters Whether we’re looking for them or not, life grants us lessons, learnings and understandings at every turn. Since writing Better Apart, we’ve learned that forgiveness is upsetting for many of us, simply because it can feel as though forgiveness means we’re condoning the behavior or circumstance. Sharing here is an excerpt on Forgiveness from Better Apart; The Radically Positive Way to Separate especially when it feels impossible. “Forgiveness is messy and complicated. It’s a cleansing and a release, an ending and a beginning. It’s the letting go of blame; it’s the inv ..read more

Essential Inquiries for Pre-Session/Pre-Mediation Content Adapted for Mediators from The Secret To Getting Along (And Why It’s Easier than You Think) by Gabrielle Hartley, Esq. The extent to which the YES method is utilized and the framing of the below inquiries issues will vary based on the nature of the conflict/ participant. However, in all cases, moving the parties to a framework open to possibilities is the best way to potentially reach a resolution. To resolve any heated discussion, it’s essential to introduce the parties to the idea that taking a step back is the best way forward. Fra ..read more

Becoming Truly Better Apart: Healing and Growth Through Divorce Embarking on your divorce journey can be a challenging and emotional experience. Deciding to divorce, or realizing that you have no choice but to divorce comes with feelings of uncertainty, heartache, and even fear. While divorce is often sad, and the process may seem daunting, it can also be an opportunity for immense personal growth, healing, and a path to greater peace and happiness. As a divorce mediator, I have witnessed thousands of couples transition through the complexities of divorce. Throughout this journey, I have com ..read more

Co-Parenting and Back-to-School: Navigating Drop-Offs with Ease The back-to-school season is a time of excitement and anticipation for children of all ages, but for divorced parents, it can also bring a unique set of challenges.   To truly become Better Apart, coordinating schedules, managing emotions, and fostering open communication become even more crucial during this period.   Whether you’re navigating who gets to be there the first time your kindergartner is greeted by their new all-day caretaker, or deciding who is dropping your now big “little one” off to college, this can b ..read more

The Goldilocks Solution: The Vital Role of Clarity in Divorce Mediation In the heart of every storm, there lies a path to clarity.   As a divorce mediator, I have witnessed numerous couples navigate through the tempest of emotions to find the “just right” solution for even the most heated arguments. Much like the tale of Goldilocks seeking the perfect porridge and chair, clarity serves as the guiding light in the Better Apart Divorce Mediation process. In this article, we explore the importance of clarity in divorce mediation (one of the five elements of a Better Apart divorce. Clarity ..read more

Finding Meaningful Relationships After Divorce: Navigating Your Future Divorce is a life-altering event that can leave individuals feeling emotionally drained, socially disconnected, and uncertain about the future. Besides marital possessions, friends are often a casualty of divorce. Some friends go with the “ex” and some don’t know how to include a newly single friend in their lives when their other friends are part of a couple. In the aftermath of a divorce, it is crucial for adults to seek and cultivate new meaningful relationships. These connections serve as vital support systems, offeri ..read more

The Recipe For A “Better Apart” Divorce I wrote Better Apart with the hope of powerfully transforming the conversation around divorce. I wanted to be a force in releasing the shame and stigma associated with breaking up and empowering people to feel good about their lives and about themselves even when their relationship has broken down. Better Apart and the transformative possibilities it holds for your divorce journey. If you’ve yet to read Better Apart; The Radically Positive Way to Separate, you can grab your copy here. To get you started in understanding what a Better Apart divorce is ..read more

Interview by The Cornellian Recently I was interviewed by my college alumni magazine “the Cornellian” about my thoughts on conflict. I wanted to share this interview with you together with some links to my two conflict resolution books, each of which are designed as tools to help you move through and beyond divorce.   Here’s the interview:   These days, how much do we need tools for conflict resolution? Turn the television on; scroll through your social media feed. There are areas in which it’s badly needed in the world—but it’s also needed in smaller ways, in our households and ex ..read more

What Counts as Income in a Divorce Income is a vital aspect of our lives. It is the money we earn from work or investments that help us sustain our daily needs. For couples, income plays a critical role in a divorce, especially when it comes to determining child support and spousal support payments. But what happens when one spouse is deliberately underreporting their income or chooses to quit their job to avoid paying support? This is where imputed income comes into play. So, what is income? Income refers to any money that a person earns from their job, investments, or any other source of r ..read more