Greeting Goat Fans, Let me introduce myself. My names Eunice and I’m the youngest and most adorable member of the Elderberry Bottom Goat Herd. Since I was a young carefree kid I had often overheard my Mum and Aunts reflecting on their visits to Weston-super-Mare. There would be lots of whispering, giggling and the odd wink but as I approached they would suddenly stop talking and start grazing. I eventually summoned up the courage to ask Mum directly what happened at the sea side resort. She smiled gently and bleated kindly that I would find out soon enough! Well, a few weeks ago I woke up fee ..read more

Greetings Goat Loving Humans, I thought it was about time to introduce myself. My name’s Gladys and I’m the glamorous grandkid of Myrtle, Uffculme’s famous pin up goat. I feel compelled to set the record straight following Spartacus’s rather indelicate revelations in last months Spotlight. To be fair, he was correct in his assertion that I am the most attractive girl in the herd ,however, to then divulge personal information about my recent friskiness was beyond humiliating. Spartacus may self identify as Uffculme’s greatest love machine but, following his trip to the vet several years ago, we ..read more

'Tis I Spartacus, I expect you have all missed me so I thought I would pen a few lines to cheer you all. I am afraid that my misgivings about online dating have proved correct. There will soon be a pattering of tiny hooves up here at the Goaterie Coterie! I am sure everyone will be delighted even if it means that our sleep will be disturbed by the light snoring of our esteemed poo sweeper upper, Tracy. She feels, I suppose, duty bound to sleep near the mother to be. As a result we are all a little short of space but she means well. Naturally as Head Male Goat I will be on hand to offer advice ..read more

Tis I Spartacus of Elderberry Goat farm, oh yes and the soap company that our carer Tracy goes on about. I felt that it was time for me to assert my authority over Myrtle, who is a jolly good old gal but who we ask is the power behind the throne? The answer of course is...me!! Myrtle has let her notoriety go to her head I'm afraid and really, her ego has rather overwhelmed me recently, but no longer. Her coy references to Weston-super Mare were rather hurtful to me (for obvious reasons) as we are just good friends. However lately there have been rumours that she thinks she is a supermodel whi ..read more

Greetings!!!! ‘Tis I, Myrtle, Chief Spokesgoat for The Dirty Old Goat Soap Company and, perhaps unknown to some, International Supermodel (a story for another occasion....) I thought I’d keep you updated on what’s been happening at Elderberry Bottom during these strange times! We were expecting a quiet year. None of us gals had tootled off to Weston-super-Mare for a ‘date night’ so no little Bleaters were due to put in an appearance. (This was just as well as Mabel, my wayward youngest, continues to be quite demanding!) Anyway, our sole intention was to put our hoofs up, graze and chill during ..read more

Greetings My Lovelies No doubt you have all been extremely concerned at the lack of updates from us ‘Gals’ at Elderberry Bottom. Well, between you and me I can reveal the reason is due to a recent trauma we have endured and I have only just recovered sufficiently to put pen to paper. Now, when it comes to mounting my soap box for a good old moan, I think I’m more entitled than the majority….. (Additionally I have more soap boxes than most of you!!) So here goes…… We became aware that something was ahoof when the poo girl changed her fleece from an insipid dull grey to a rather brassy blond, da ..read more

Dear Humans, I thought I’d better update you all with what’s been happening at Elderberry Bottom, home of The Dirty Old Goat Soap Goats, (and ME, the famous Myrtle) I should explain that for the past several years we have employed our care provider Tracy as not only poo sweeperupper, chef and cuddle provider but also Chief Milk Maid. Alas I can only describe her milking technique as clumsy and perfunctory however on the ‘up’ side she took so long to complete the task that we were able to indulge ourselves with extra food whilst she tugged away. We knew something was afoot when a couple of mont ..read more

Well Hello! I thought I’d introduce myself. My name is Mango and I’m the very latest addition to the Elderberry Bottom Goat Herd. My appearance into this world was apparently a little traumatic for some. Let me explain..... There I was, floating around in my little cozy space, all dark, warm and snuggly. (To be fair the space had recently started to become a little congested and perhaps a bit too ‘bijou’.) Suddenly I was woken from my slumber by a huge brouhaha. There was a great deal of loud bleating and the next thing I knew a colossal human hand starts pulling on my legs. Well what a Liber ..read more

Good day friends, another short piece from the Chief Goat here. I have received a number of kind comments and support following my last missile! This time however I have to tell you that I’m a trifle worried.... Gorgeous Gladys (one of our most attractive girls with a dazzling smile, as can be seen above) is apparently growing up fast and I have heard a rumour that some time in the near future she may be partaking of a tryst! This naturally concerns me as her guardian and friend, and I am worried that she may have been dabbling in online dating. She has a definite glint in her eye and has bec ..read more

Hi there humans! Tracy our care provider and poo sweeper-upper has suggested to me that I need to Blog......whatever that is!? As her keyboard is completely inadequate (and not fit for purpose if you have sizeable hoofs) I have had to rely on her limited capabilities on a P.C. As a result she has taken a little while (over a year in fact) putting this down on paper so I can only apologise. Anyway.....here it is..... Back in December 2018 Tracy arrived at the stable, brush in hand, clippers at the ready. I found myself being petted, pampered and pedicured. She advised me that we were on our way ..read more