Ask a sex coach ” I would love to learn how to increase female sensitivity. I’m in my late 20s, and I don’t feel anything internally. In comparison with my clit, my vagina feels numb.” – Karen Dear Karen, In the world where media and romantic novels often portray an idealized version of pleasure and sensitivity, it’s all too easy to assume that everyone else experiences immense pleasure from penetration. Thinking this way might result in: feeling ashamed or not good enough tolerating sex that is not pleasurable being uncomfortable to share your experience (which only deepens your sense of s ..read more

4-week “Pleasure Basics” Women’s Group Focus. Drive. Productivity. This is our reality of life in a masculine world. Slowing down, getting in touch with your sensuality, prioritizing what feels good to you is my invitation for you to tap more fully into your feminine power. I’m excited to bring in years of experience with Tantra and Sex and Intimacy coaching to help you fully connect with your pleasure, desire, and feminine sexual essence. Over the course of 4 weeks, we’ll explore: Blocks that inhibit your sexual expression Fundamental tools for creating more pleasure and sensation Women ..read more

This is my honest review and experience with the VITA Sex, Love & Relationship Coach Certification offered by Layla Martin and the VITA Institute. By the time I thought about joining Layla Martin’s training, I had completed a number of other sex coaching certifications (with the Somatica Institute, International Institute for Sexological Bodywork, Tao Tantric Arts, Shakti Malan, and Michaela Boehm.) I wasn’t sure if I wanted to invest in another one, and it took me over 2 years to commit. So, what inspired me to join? I was on Layla’s email list for years, and time and again, the depth ..read more

While so many people still rely on porn to learn about sex, many free online resources are much more useful and can make a difference in your sex life. If you’re seeking guidance, looking to enhance your intimacy, or simply curious about the complexities of human sexuality and connections, here is a list of top sex and relationship blogs that provide insightful perspectives and expert advice. • Dan Savage’s blog “Savage Love” Dan Savage is a well-known sex advice columnist and LGBTQ+ rights advocate. His blog offers a wide range of content, including reader-submitted questions, personal anecdo ..read more

Interested in getting a better understanding of sexual polarity? My story below is a real-life example of polarity at work… I met Eric on my three months long trip in Central America at a random couch surfing party. He was exactly my type: adventurous, mysterious, and a badass. It was “love at first 6 hours of talking.” He was in Panama for five months already, studying Spanish, learning how to dance salsa, and figuring out whether he should pursue a law degree. He lived to challenge himself. Whether it is with martial arts, learning languages, unconventional career choices, or adapting to f ..read more

I bet you saw hundreds of memes over the years poking fun at failed New Year resolutions. I find reflections for New Year to be a more helpful practice. You are more likely to create change when your goals are small, measurable, and realistic. Less pressure and more understanding of yourself and your patterns will help you come up with these kinds of achievable goals. Here are my 10 questions to reflect on for New Year. I recommend answering them both for your Personal and Professional life. 10 Self Reflections for the New Year What would you like to create or experience more of in the New Ye ..read more

I was recently asked to give some ideas on how a couple can improve their relationship if their sexual preferences are not compatible. It inspired me to explore what goes into sex compatibility below. In a nutshell, you are sexually compatible if both your and your partner’s sexual needs are being met. That said, not many people are fully clear on what their needs are and how to communicate them. Here is a non-exhaustive list of things that people consider important when it comes to sex compatibility: Frequency When talking about being sexually compatible, perhaps most often, people talk ..read more

I was recently reading a romantic novel “The Duke who didn’t” by Courtney Milan.  What stood out for me the most were sex scenes that were modeling behavior that I often teach my sex coaching clients and hardly ever see depicted in pop culture. How often do you see a couple in a romantic novel or movie worried about sex, contraception, STIs? All very reasonable and common concerns. Romantic heroes are always perfect lovers who know exactly what to do and never once have anxiety about their performance or how to satisfy a woman in front of them. Romantic heroines don’t need a warm-up; they ..read more

Vulnerability is scary, which is why it is so hard to convince yourself to be vulnerable. Every instinct in your body screams: “Don’t do it! It’s unsafe! It’ll be used against you!” And yet, learning how to be vulnerable is essential to having loving, connected relationships. “I am afraid I won’t be able to pull it off,” – said no superhero ever. Imagine if they did! Most of us learn early on that being perceived as strong and invincible will cause people to like and respect us. Fast forward to your romantic relationships, and you find yourself saying “I’m fine” passive-aggressively while it ..read more

Seeking advice on what to do about sexless marriage is a frequent topic of most relationship forums. You are often advised to: focus on improving relationship with your spouse, perhaps reading “The seven principles for making marriage work” by a famous marriage psychologist, John Gottman improve communication, spend more quality time together, learn each other’s love languages, schedule date nights, prioritize your spouse vs. kids and career, go to a couples counselor or marriage and family therapist. All of these suggestions are helpful, in fact, most of them I recommend to my intimacy ..read more