It’s a pretty celebratory time of year! Around the world, religious and secular, national and intimate, there are so many reasons to celebrate. Children are often recipients of gifts, sometimes because it’s a special occasion and sometimes because it’s a Thursday. Toys are pretty easy to come by, but how about gifts that aren’t toys? Here’s a list of some favorite not-toys for young children. These items are not affiliate links, and Baan Dek receives no compensation from clicks or purchases. Links are included for ease and accessibility, but many of these items are available locally or second ..read more

 Baan Dek · Episode 129 – Setting Children Up For Success There’s a scene from the show Schitt’s Creek that, if you’re familiar with the show, you’ll know from the following four words: fold in the cheese. And if this doesn’t ring any bells, here’s a youtube link to watch a brief clip. Two of the main characters are making a recipe together, and they get stuck at the instruction to “fold in the cheese.” We laugh because they’re so out of touch and just saying something again and again doesn’t explain it. And we cringe because it’s a solid tool in trying to get children to do something, right ..read more

Baan Dek · Episode 128 – Magic Words Words are magic. Toddlers learn that when you combine sounds or gestures in a particular order, adults love it and you get what you want. We’re actually relieved when young children start communicating in words or in sign, because when they’re infants we’re all just guessing. We know something is wrong, but we can’t necessarily figure out a solution. At least when they’re communicating using words or signs they know what they want. Communication really is magic, but that’s not what this post is about. Maybe you’ve heard the phrase “magic words,” as in “wha ..read more

 Baan Dek · Episode 127 – “What Did You Do Today?” “What did you do today?” This question has been asked by generations of adults at the end of their child’s day, and the answer is almost universally, “nothing.” There’s nothing wrong with this question! Unfortunately, there’s not even a “better” question that would magically elicit more information from a child. That doesn’t mean give up hope. There’s always hope. Why is this such a tough question? Everything children are doing in Montessori uniquely dovetails with their development. You don’t notice when your shoes fit perfectly, you notice ..read more

Baan Dek · Episode 126 – Speaking For Children As I’m writing this, there’s a baby fussing and I asked his mom, “does he know what he wants?” to which she replied, “no he has no idea.” When they’re tiny, no one has any idea of anything ever. They’re guessing, we’re guessing, it’s a roll of the dice. You’re hungry, how dare I offer you food or a bottle, I’m so exhausted what could possibly make you think I need to sleep. They’re cold and hot at the same time. These pants are touching my legs. When they’re fresh little ones we’re not just parents and caregivers, we’re detectives and interpreter ..read more

Baan Dek · Episode 125 – Toileting Doesn't Have to be Tough Toileting doesn’t have to be tough. Any new experience is a learning process, sure, but there can be a monster-in-the-closet sense around toileting. When you read about how it can happen in a weekend, it can be easy to feel a sense of discouragement, failure, or shame when that’s not the case for your child. Each child is unique, and each process will be unique. Here are a few game-changers that can really help things along the way — actual tools as well as mindset or language shifts. Any time you’re getting ready for a new activity ..read more

Baan Dek · Episode 124 – Challenge is Essential If you’ve ever peeked into a Montessori classroom, you’ll see children working at various levels of intensity individually and in small groups. You’ll see children concentrating, and as classroom adults it’s our responsibility to protect that concentration. A young child’s work is completely process-oriented. To paraphrase Dr. Montessori, “ An adult works to perfect the environment; a child works to perfect themselves.” When I’m tying a bow, the goal is to tie the bow — on a shoe, on a present — when a child is tying a bow, the goal is to learn ..read more

 Baan Dek · Episode 123 – Reactive to Responsive to Proactive Maybe you’ve heard the phrase, “respond rather than react.” There’s a lot of work being done in childcare, parenting, education, and other child-advocacy circles — in addition to areas outside the child-centered sphere — about becoming trauma-informed, examining our own experiences and how those shape our perspective, generally bringing a sense of mindfulness to personal and professional relationships. On social media, you might have seen some of these excellent resources, such as Mr. Chazz or Michelle at conscious.hippie.mama that ..read more

For a podcast of this post, listen here or subscribe on iTunes. Baan Dek · Episode 114 – Do As I Do The original title of this post was “how to get your child to do anything.” Upon further reflection, this seemed like it could be interpreted as clickbait or manipulation, but, really, this is how you get your child to do anything. We call it Grace & Courtesy. Grace & Courtesy are the “what to do when” and “how to” lessons of the classroom. They’re direct instruction on rules, policy, how to be a human in this space and time. Children will learn anything as long as they’re provided with ..read more

Baan Dek · Episode 122 – Montessori & The Olympics The Olympics are coming up, which is one of the few sporting events I watch. I look forward to them, have them set to record, it’s a whole thing. They’re fantastic to watch with children, too. As a general rule Montessori doesn’t really encourage children to use technology, so this might be surprising. I don’t think I’ve ever written a post or recorded a podcast about TV to watch with your child. Stay with me. Every good rule has to be broken sometimes. The Olympics are educational, they’re fun, they’re inspirational. The opening ceremoni ..read more