A Winnipeg, Man., arts organization has streamlined its approach to Indigenous consultation—by replacing its entire advisory board with cardboard cutouts of smiling Indigenous people. The Classical Dance Foundation made the switch following years of conflicts with its human Indigenous advisory board, which had demanded greater inclusivity and input in decision-making. “We were hoping our previous ..read more

A group of researchers say centuries of colonial violence across the Americas, Africa, Asia, and India have their roots in one thing: violent video games. According to the research, the roots of European imperialism can be traced directly to the ‘no-mercy’ ethos seen in popular gaming franchises like Call of Duty, Grand Theft Auto and ..read more

Centuries of conventional warfare proving insufficient, the world’s wealthiest white nations have discovered a new battleground: the global economy. With tariffs flying like missiles, a full-scale trade war is now underway. “Bombs,  F35’s, and boots on the ground are a little too ‘on the nose,'” said white spokesperson Lily Leblanc.  “Jack up the tariffs, crash ..read more

In the wake of comments by U.S. President-Elect Donald Trump about making Canada the 51st state, settlers are anxious about the prospect of their stolen land being stolen by another land’s settlers. “We stole this land fair and square, now they want to come steal it?” lamented Blanche Albus, a settler in Toronto, Ontario. “This ..read more

RCMP say maintaining the delicate balance between reconciliation and laying brutal beatings on First Nations people is one of the force’s greatest challenges. “Do we want reconciliation? Yes. Do we want to continue to tackle First Nations and brutally beat them in front of their families? Also yes,” RCMP Commissioner Michael Duheme told reporters. “It’s ..read more

A First Nations man left crowds shocked and delighted when he donned a 50-gallon hat at a powwow in Billings, Montana. Witnesses say the black felt, open-crown hat was at least four feet tall and decorated with a leather band and a feather, making it almost as tall as a small tree. “At first, I thought someone ..read more

Here’s some of the hard-hitting stories Walking Eagle News is keeping an eye on, but is too lazy to write a full article about: ‘How is THAT racist?’ nation’s whites ask Speaking to reporters at a hastily called press conference, the nation’s white people demanded to know how that could be considered racist. “How is ..read more

A group of researchers say centuries of colonial violence across the Americas, Africa, Asia, and India have their roots in one thing: violent video games. According to the research, the roots of European imperialism can be traced directly to the ‘no-mercy’ ethos seen in popular gaming franchises like Call of Duty, Grand Theft Auto and ..read more

Manitoba Premier Wab Kinew is assuring the public that conservation officers can take part in his plan to help patrol the Canada-United States border, and still make the time to harass Indigenous hunters in the province. “We’re confident that with a bit of overtime, and no small amount of elbow grease, these conservation officers will ..read more

During a closely watched news conference on Friday morning, a black-capped chickadee laid bare what many have long suspected. “‘Chickadee-dee-dee-deee,” the chickadee said, speaking to reporters from the branch of a willow in Manigotagan, Manitoba. “Chickadee-deeeee-deeeee-deeeeee,” the chickadee added. It’s unclear what prompted the chickadee’s outburst, but one thing is certain: the message has left the ..read more