“This will be a group project.”   I can’t think of any worst sentence that would leave an OC (overcontrolled) person frantically looking in all directions, desperate for an escape from this situation. After all, we’ve all been there. Since elementary school, we are taught to share, and to work in groups. There are many advantages to this, but in my opinion, way more disadvantages (hehe ). Apparently, the benefits of teamwork include developing better communication skills, learning to compromise, and seeing problems from a perspective other than your own. Well, if you’re OC like me, you m ..read more

Lesson 14 in RO-DBT mindfulness teaches awareness of harsh judgments and encourages us to notice our judgmental social signal towards self and others. It asks questions like, “How do I express my harsh judgmental thoughts about others? For example, do I exhibit a flat face, scowl, look away, laugh or chuckle, seek agreement from others, tell them it’s for their own good, stare, puff out my chest, talk faster, adopt a commanding voice, roll my eyes, pout, go silent, act disgusted, behave as if I’m not bothered or they are unimportant, begin planning revenge, or smile while giving backhanded pra ..read more

I have been giving some extra thoughts these days to Lesson 17 from the Skills Manual.  As I reflected in my last blog, British Columbia has a provincial health officer whose motto is “Be kind, be calm, be safe.”  Everyone in my province has been reminded of this daily though COVID updates, but also through all the merchandise the motto has produced to support local charities!  I myself own a fetching charcoal grey tee. (It is the top of my wardrobe choice for my next in person training).  Anyway, enough about post COVID fashion fantasies, let’s return to kindness. In Lesso ..read more

I have always admired the art of tattoos, and the historical significance they hold in many communities.  We can see how the recent fame of Quannah Chasinghorse, who is Hän Gwich’in and Oglala Lakota, has given space to speak to the cultural reclamation of tattooing, and we can also see how the wider cultural uptake of tattoos has also reduced their “shock” value that might have existed a mere 20 years ago.  I mean, even our Prime Minister of Canada has one, even though it is politically contentious due to its design.  Many of my friends have tattoos that are symbolic of life tr ..read more

When I first read the RO-DBT manual, I was blown away. In a sense, I felt comforted, knowing that I was not the only one who struggled with OC (overcontrol) tendencies. I remember reading descriptions of individuals who could benefit from the treatment, and I recall thinking, “Oh my god, that’s me!” Everything made more sense.   After all, I was a pro at masking my inner feelings. I always downplayed the negative rather than overstated the positive. I “noticed the trees but missed the forest.” A book misaligned on a bookshelf triggered anxiety and I can’t even tell you how many times I re ..read more

I have always admired the art of tattoos, and the historical significance they hold in many communities.  We can see how the recent fame of Quannah Chasinghorse, who is Hän Gwich’in and Oglala Lakota, has given space to speak to the cultural reclamation of tattooing, and we can also see how the wider cultural uptake of tattoos has also reduced their “shock” value that might have existed a mere 20 years ago.  I mean, even our Prime Minister of Canada has one, even though it is politically contentious due to its design.  Many of my friends have tattoos that are symbolic of life tr ..read more

Last fall, I was lucky and privileged enough to participate in an RO-DBT skills class. When I think about the class, a lot of memories come to mind. However, the first one that pops up involves my instructors leading us through one of the exercises from the RO-DBT skills training manual. That day, we were going over the Flexible Mind ADOPTS skill, which stands for: Acknowledge that feedback is occurring. Describe emotions, bodily sensations, and thoughts. Open to the feedback. Pinpoint specifically what the feedback is suggesting and determine whether you should accept or decline the feedback ..read more

When I first read the RO-DBT manual, I was blown away. In a sense, I felt comforted, knowing that I was not the only one who struggled with OC (overcontrol) tendencies. I remember reading descriptions of individuals who could benefit from the treatment, and I recall thinking, “Oh my god, that’s me!” Everything made more sense.   After all, I was a pro at masking my inner feelings. I always downplayed the negative rather than overstated the positive. I “noticed the trees but missed the forest.” A book misaligned on a bookshelf triggered anxiety and I can’t even tell you how many times I re ..read more

“What does RO-DBT stand for?” I asked, my ears perking up. Of course, I needed to know what the acronym stood for, immediately. After all, it was my common practice that whenever I heard a word I didn’t understand, I just had to learn its definition as soon as possible, even if it meant excusing myself to go to the bathroom to Google the word. Thank God for technology, and goodbye old and heavy dictionary! “It stands for Radically-Open Dialectical Behavior Therapy,” my skills class instructor answered offhandedly. Then he returned his attention to the rest of the group and moved on to the next ..read more

Last fall, I was lucky and privileged enough to participate in an RO-DBT skills class. When I think about the class, a lot of memories come to mind. However, the first one that pops up involves my instructors leading us through one of the exercises from the RO-DBT skills training manual. That day, we were going over the Flexible Mind ADOPTS skill, which stands for: Acknowledge that feedback is occurring. Describe emotions, bodily sensations, and thoughts. Open to the feedback. Pinpoint specifically what the feedback is suggesting and determine whether you should accept or decline the feedback ..read more