I am literally so tired of being unhappy. I just want to be around people who make me feel loved and liked and invited and it’s like… I can’t find nobody like that nowhere. I’m starting to think I’m the problem. I have to be. I feel like I’m unpleasant to be around or maybe I’m so anxious I just make that up in my head. I get around people-adults, strangers, my man & his family, my clients- and feel SO. FUCKING. ALIVE!!! Why can’t I keep that around my FAMILY?? Why are the people I should be closest to the ones who make me feel like I need to throw some distance between us? The literal tho ..read more

It’s been 2 years and life has taken so much from me and given me even more. Year 2 of motherhood has felt like one foot in, one out, and a whole nother one completely disconnected from my body-but super vital and like hanging on by a thread- that double dutches in and out. I’ve started to become reflective in this second year of motherhood, this 23rd year of life. A little bit more grateful, validated, lost and yet found, home and nowhere near home at all. Trip #2 felt a little like flying too close to the sun in a sweatsuit but dammit we made it and made it we will keep doing. And while I ma ..read more

684 days. Almost 2 years. My body, her body, literally skin-to-skin everyday for all these days. 684 days…and counting. Now, 699 days. Nearly 700 days. Probably about 10,000 nursing sessions. Me and Bean, Bean and me; fed by the boob, tethered by the boob. I am so damn tired y’all and yet… I keep setting myself back. I keep finding an excuse or two- “Well she hasn’t eaten today”. “But it’s our bonding time!” “But… I don’t want anymore. I can power through.” But… I can’t power through. I need to stop, I need to just end it and be done. I need to put me first. I don’t know how to put me first. I ..read more

“I’m changing, Mom. I’m finally figuring out who I am. But I’m scared it’ll take me away from you.” -Meilin Lee, Turning Red 2022 I made a promise to myself, and to Bean, that no matter what I do or don’t do- Imma always try. I have not been trying lately. I’ve just been existing. Floating. Halfway in, halfway out; mostly out, sometimes in. I’m tired of floating and clinging, grabbing on to shit that don’t have my name on it. So I’m letting go; gonna sink for a while then come right back up, renewed and refreshed, like a new woman. The Hot Young Mom was never really *it* for me. It was a cute ..read more

I’m a bad mom. Like legitimately terrible at this motherhood thing and like maybe to outside people I’m not but I am. I lose my cool ALL of the time. I want to yell when I’m not being obeyed. I be tempted to “pop her legs” or say “Imma spank yo butt” like 75 times a week. I don’t like leaving the house with her, or at least the process it takes to even get out the door. I wish a certain somebody that will (maybe) one day be pivotal to her life would disappear. We don’t do mommy and me classes, play dates, hell I couldn’t even drag myself out of the bed last winter to keep her in swim lessons ..read more

I think I might have a teeny tiny crush on like 2 people y’all. One more than the other but still… this is weird. And uncomfortable. And kind of fun? I don’t know. Whatever this is, it’s refreshing. New, different, awakening or whatever. It’s been a long time since I even looked at somebody romantically and to be honest, I liked it that way. I was guarded and felt protected; can’t hurt me if you can’t get in! And truthfully, I liked it better that way- guarded and protected . I have a hard time being vulnerable anddd I don’t know if I necessarily consider that a bad thing right now. Like what ..read more

“Baby how you feelin?” “FEELIN GOOD AS HELLLL!” I’m screaming that from the rooftops today! Baby I am feeling good as HELL on today’s date! I feel unstoppable, powerful, cute, refreshed, grateful… all of the things and I’m holding on to it like it’s my last breath. Wait, shit, that last line might’ve been in bad taste considering *waves around* all of this but whatever, y’all know what I mean! I got my pep back, my steps have been reordered; I feel like I can breathe again. God I haven’t been breathing right but today… today I might. I might go outside and stand under the sun (or moon, maybe b ..read more

Picture it: Walmart (or Target or Dollar Tree- any store, really) 7 days before Valentine’s Day and you still have nothing but a box of candy for your toddler! You can’t believe the holiday has snuck up on you like this and you are absolutely stuck on what to buy. Don’t fret! I’ve got you covered; after all, I am the queen of last minute crafting and gifting. Browse the gift guides below and keep reading to see how you can celebrate Valentine’s day with your little one! No expensive budget or extensive planning required Toddler Vday Gift GuidesDownload me Create your own gift bags, or show m ..read more

“Hey Siri, Cue: real sad girl vibes, loads of liquor, and a whole bunch of tears!” My fawking auntie died y’all!!! My girl, my dawg, my mama when my mama was getting on my nerves- GONE!!! I swear to GOD my heart is about to walk out my chest. Forreal forreal. When I tell y’all these have been the longest 9 days of my LIFE?!?! This song has been in my head on the worst kind of repeat and I honestly don’t even care enough to find a new tune to take over. I miss my girl! I’m tired of losing family, seriously. I honestly got some questions for my homie Big G (God, not Greg- but Greg too, shit!)! I ..read more

I’m obsessed with Encanto; there, I said it. I’m obsessed with the movie Encanto and I want you to be too! If the soundtrack was on wax, I’d probably have run it down by now- that’s how bad it is over here LOL!! In my constant watching and analyzing, I’ve taken a couple of wonderful life lessons from the “Family Madrigal”, lessons I share with you below. Keep reading then tell me what lessons you took from the movie or if it’s next up on your watchlist! Warning: This post contains movie spoilers. Don’t proceed if you hate spoilers! Disney’s Encanto is now available on Disney+ Encanto’s opening ..read more