Recently me and John decided to get married. My relationship status on Facebook has been ‘engaged’ for around two years now and I was going to be happy with it without getting married. Do you find it weird? ‘Engaged’ sounds more serious than ‘in a relationship’ and it was all I wanted. But one day, when John was at mine, I was watching Say yes to the dress, a show about choosing wedding dress, and I asked him jokingly when I can buy wedding dress and he said I can. But we would need to get married, I said. We will, he said. And that was it, we will get married without moving in together. John ..read more

While walking through town today I felt a sudden desire for English sausages. I was getting quite hungry as I fasted for 40 hours straight (yes, I have been doing intermittent fasting again and not only I finally lost weight but also I don’t have to watch my portion sizes when I eat). I was initially planning to fast further 3 hours but then thought, sod it, I want to eat right now. I checked a couple of places and realised that fried mushrooms disappeared from traditional breakfast and hash browns had been replaced by chips. I don’t mind not having mushrooms that much but I really like hash b ..read more

There is that big tree in the corner of my garden. The trunk is just by the fence and the branches encroach on two neighbouring gardens. The tree must have been there for several years and it wasn’t a problem so far but I do understand that it might be; I certainly wouldn’t like if neighbours’ tree would take space in my garden, especially if it’s branches would grow really low, like this one. A few months ago I received an email from the council stating that I need to trim the branches, but the problem with that is, the trunk is so close to the fence that to trim anything I’d need access from ..read more

So, on the morning of 31st of October me and John drove 3.5h up north for his mum funeral. It was the first time I took part in the funeral in the UK and it seemed very different from the ceremony in Poland. John’s dad wasn’t taking things very well and I felt very sorry for him. I also met some of John’s family and they all seemed nice people. I also met his brother for the first time and I must say he looks very much like John although neither of them seem to take after their parents. After the ceremony the closest family met at the house for tea and sandwiches and I was given my tea in a mu ..read more

Yesterday around 10am, when I was awake for a few hours but still in my pj, relaxing in bed, someone knocked at my door. I went downstairs (I live in a first floor maisonette), opened the door and saw a man in his 30s. ‘They sent a letter to me to this address’ he said and I was completely bewildered. My first instinct was to ask who is they, not because I was that interested but because without this information the sentence didn’t make much sense to me. Somehow I managed to realize that I shouldn’t ask about it but I didn’t know what else to say instead so I was just standing there mumbling s ..read more

I had a gardener cutting some trees in my garden today and every time I had to speak with him I felt really upset. He was a nice bloke but it wasn’t the first time I felt this way when I had to speak with someone. Thank god I don’t get this at work or when shopping (although I usually choose self service checkout anyway) but probably everywhere else. Later on I was on the bus, wearing headphones, and a young woman approached me. I took my headphones off and she said I look very nice in a top I was wearing. The colour works very well for me, she said. I was rather surprised. I got that top from ..read more

So I decided lately that I need to improve my upper body strength and my posture and I decided to hire personal trainer to show me some exercises. When I was at the gym I approached a young man sitting in the reception area and I asked him if he’s personal trainer. He said yes. I wanted 30 minutes session but he told me he doesn’t do them and no other trainers do. I was a bit deflated, I barely ever exercise over one hour and with new exercises it will be even more difficult but I was determined so I agreed. He told me he charges £25 per session and before starting he does assesment which is f ..read more

This is a situation that happened to me recently and it’s so priceless that I decided to put it on the blog regardless. So, there is that woman I met around a month ago, she’s a few years older than me and also Polish. We, Polish, often say that we need to be extra careful with other Polish people because it’s them who will give us most troubles. I don’t think that being Polish means we are prone to give other people troubles but possibly some of us trust others a bit too quickly as we feel lonely. But this woman is very nice so when she asked me for favour, I… It’s a long story so bear with m ..read more

Hello Everyone, I didn’t post for quite a while, I do apologise. As some of you may remember I have a new job now. Fessey House was great but at some point I started feeling I want something else out of life. I now work, again, in a care home for people with learning disability and the place is so completely different to what I knew from before that I had a lot to think about workplace dynamics. You know, new colleagues, new inspirations, new options and new friendships. I would love to share it all with you, together with my comments on other people behaviour but I didn’t tell anybody at work ..read more

I started feeling better on lamotrigine already but for around a week now my depression seems to be coming back. I didn’t see John last weekend and I won’t see him this weekend either. Can someone explain to me how it is possible that I miss him so badly but at the same time it feels like I don’t even have energy to take a shower to get ready for our date? I’m going to work tomorrow, after being off for 3 days, so will have to have a shower before I go to sleep anyway, but I won’t take it any sooner. I also have to pick up my meds from the pharmacy that is only 5 minutes walk from my flat. Tha ..read more