When Children at Risk in Ireland (CARI) got in touch with us some months ago and told us their waiting list was currently 5 years long, we were, as you can imagine, horrified. To think, any child who discloses they have been sexually abused are denied immediate help and support, is, and should be, shocking and abhorrent to everyone.  These are children ranging in ages from 3 to 12 years old. Ireland has a history of failing to protect our children, yet we continue to stand by and watch those in positions of power, demonstrate that they have learnt nothing from the past.  These same o ..read more

I believe timing played a major role in the public’s reaction to the Belfast rape trial.  The world has changed a lot in the last six months and for many, the trial represented the straw that broke the camel’s back. Shift in Thinking Rape cases happen every day but because of how this trial was reported on, and the treatment of both the victim and the accused men, this case caused a palpable shift in thinking about casual sex and how consent is given and understood. For many women both north and south of the border it was time to stand up and say enough is enough. It is also reasonable to ..read more

Is it bad that I am a perfectionist? I can say that I would have been very happy to describe myself as a perfectionist as I saw it as a person who was good and wanted to do their best. I was often teased for the way I did certain things in the house. I ignored this believing that I was doing things right and they are just too lazy to bother. I never saw it as a negative way of being in the world. Dr.Brené Brown says perfectionism is one of the three main ways people protect themselves from getting hurt. She says it is just a form of armour and connected to your sense of shame and fear of ..read more

With the pending visit to Ireland of Pope Francis in August, it may be a good opportunity for us all to re-examine our religious beliefs and look at how Irish society has been formed and influenced by the Church. It may also be right to realise that even if the church don’t admit and take responsibility for the many children in Ireland who suffered sexual abuse, we all need to acknowledge that due to their oppression and dominance their teachings created the environment that enabled child sexual abuse to grow to levels we are still not even touching the sides of. Body Shame I recently joined a ..read more

why can’t I control my reactions?   'Trigger Warning' if you or someone you know has been affected by sexual abuse please remember the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre 24-Hour Helpline 1800 77 8888 In today’s podcast we will be discussing triggers for victims of childhood sexual abuse. What are they? and why do we need to know about them. For victims of abuse or trauma of any description a trigger can be anything that reminds you of your trauma. These triggers are extremely personal and can occur at any time. Triggers can be sounds, smells, tastes, touch, the tone in someone ..read more

A Bill to prevent schools from using their religious ethos to avoid teaching fact-based and responsible sex relationships education to their pupils, is currently at the second stage of debating before the Dáil.  The Provision of Objective Sex Education Bill is designed to prevent denominational schools teaching sex education based on their own views of sexuality and intimacy. This Bill was developed to ensure that all students regardless of their religious backgrounds are provided with an understanding about consent, contraception, abortion, sexuality and gender issues in a non ..read more

Can you ever be healed from the impacts of childhood sexual abuse? or does childhood sexual abuse become part or your DNA? It might seem strange to anyone who has not suffered abuse to even ask the question, can you heal from abuse. This is because we live in a society where conditions or ailments can be treated or cured by taking a course of medication.  For those of us who have experienced sexual abuse or childhood trauma, it can often feel like it can never be overcome. Even when you think that you are doing ‘okay’ and getting on with things, a major event can throw you to such an exte ..read more

Male Privilege and Just How Dangerous it is to us All The other night I watched a documentary on Netflix called ‘Hello Privilege, It’s Me, Chelsea’ in which Chelsea Handler an American comedian explored what it means to be born with white privilege in America. While watching the programme I couldn’t help making comparisons with what I see as ‘Male Privilege.’ During the programme it became clear that Chelsea was fighting a losing battle when trying to ask white Americans about how they believed they may have benefited from being white. Time and time again she got met with denial, ign ..read more

'Trigger Warning' if you or someone you know has been affected by sexual abuse please remember the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre 24-Hour Helpline 1800 77 8888 In today’s podcast (episode 19) ‘Will I Always Be Afraid!’  we will be discussing fear; how it has and continues to impact our lives as a result of our experience of childhood sexual abuse. For each of us fear has played a significant role throughout our childhoods and continues to act as a barrier even today. It has been driven by a core belief gifted to each of us by our father that we were useless and wo ..read more

March 15th, 2022 Welcome back everyone to our first podcast in almost 2 years.  As life is returning to some semblance of normality, we felt it was time to ease back into our work. The reason we stood back from social media for so long was purely about self-preservation.  We all realised quickly into the pandemic, that we were each feeling triggered by all the restrictions that were in place and so, to protect ourselves and our mental health, we felt social media, podcasts and our website was too difficult for us to manage as we each retreated into our own form of survival mode.  ..read more