What other people say to us are outside of our control.  But our thoughts about what they said create emotions in us, then those emotions drive the actions we take.  What your loved one said doesn't affect you , until you have a thought(s) about it. In this week's episode, I talk about how what happens outside of us, is neutral until we have thoughts about it. Take a listen. Resources: Download our FREE guide on how to care for yourself first, so that you are in a bettter position to help your spouse and children.  Support the show ..read more

Our thoughts cause our feelings, then our feelings fuel our actions - In this case the action is - eating. There is an emotion that precedes the action of eating; there is a thought or story that precedes that emotion.  What would you be doing if you were not eating?  You could feel all the feelings that come up. Feelings are just that - feelings. Though they may be uncomfortable, they don't kill us. When we allow them to be there, instead of resisting, they will go away and then come back. Support the show ..read more

We have been conditioned to think that we can solve for our children’s emotional wellbeing. The truth of the matter is that we cannot.  Dr. Wayne Dyer said that our children come through us - because that is how procreation works. But they are not for us. Contrary to what we have been told, we don’t own our children.  Just like us, our children have good and bad days. Because life is 50% good and 50% bad. Because we have both positive and negative emotions.  Our children are not problems to be solved. It is not our job to make them happy. Because happiness, just like any other e ..read more

As a caregiver, there are a lot of things that are unknown.  A lot of things your brain will interpret as scary - sending you down the rabbit hole of fear. The more you try to resist the emotion of fear, by eating, drinking or whatever we human beings do to try to ignore feeling fear, the more your brain will fixate on it. Fear has its benefits. When you are about to be hit by a car then you jump to the curb. When your child is about to fall and catch them. Resources: Download our FREE guide on how to get started on taking care of your own wellbeing. Support the show ..read more

Not taking care of your own wellbeing. I.e being aware of what you are thinking - not all of it of course. How to become aware of what you are thinking. I.e journaling Questioning your thoughts, helps you realize what beliefs and expectations you have for yourself and your spouse.  Answering your own questions - to avoid overwhelm and confusion Embracing negative emotion - helps you become brave + teaches you compassion- when we let ourselves experience painful emotions, it deepens our compassion for others who are experiencing painful emotions. ( allowing ourselves to meet bad experience ..read more

During the caregiving experience, there can be a lot of people coming and going in your life. Many of those people mean well, but we can have certain thoughts about well meaning people, thoughts that may cause overwhelm. In this episode, I talk about the boundaries; how do we set healthy boundaries without manipulating the other person? Resources: Download our FREE GUIDE on how to care for your own well being first, so you help care for your spouse.  Support the show ..read more

What ever thought you choose to believe, the brain will find evidence to prove it to you. When you think that you wish you had more freedom, your brain will find all that evidence to prove what you are thinking- leading to a belief.  When your brain offers you a question of how can I create freedom in my life,  answer that question.  Don’t let the question swirl around in your brain.  Unanswered questions cause confusion and overwhelm.  Resources: Download our FREE GUIDE on how to care for your own well being, so you can be in a better position to care for your loved ..read more

We can’t make life unfold the way we want it. We get frustrated because of the thoughts we have about how life has unfolded.  Should or should not are perception words. They indicate that something, a situation is supposed to be different than what it actually is…. You try to get your spouse to feel good, and not be down etc…. But you can’t prevent him from feeling negative emotion. It is a part of their life’s journey. HOlding space of for the people in our lives when they are experiencing negative emotion; is one of the most difficult things we can learn to do as humans. Resources ..read more

Overwhelm is a cue that you are holding on to unquestioned thought(s).  Overwhelm is caused by our negative thoughts about a given circumstance(s).  This leads you to question what you are doing as a caregiver, which inturn leads you to stop what you are doing.  In today's episode, I talk about how our thoughts cause overwhelm, and what we can do to relieve it. Download our FREE GUIDE on how to take care of your own well being first, so you can help care for your spouse.  Support the show ..read more

As a caregiver, sometimes you find Caregiving challenging, and you don’t want to do it, other times you may not want to do it. But you also think that well… someone has got to do it, it is my responsibility to do, this is what loyal spouses do.  Nobody else is going to do it anyway.  Then you feel guilty or resentful. Take a moment to part yourself on your back, you are just a human being with a human brain. You are doing a tremendous job; however, allow for your humanness maybe you are operating on less sleep, don’t we all become agitated when we don’t get adequate sleep? How are y ..read more