The Further Dangers of Being a Pretend Poet
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
6d ago
The thing about writing poetry isno one cares that you write poetry.I found that curious at first.Then I joined a writing group.And the thing about a writing group isno one cares that you write.I found that curious at first.Then I read what they wroteand I'm no longer curious.Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief ..read more
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Stardust Casts a Spell
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
1w ago
Neil Gaiman describes his short novel, Stardust, as a “fairytale for grown-ups.” That’s apt but not helpful. All his novels are adult fairytales, and that’s a good thing. There’s something appealing about a writer who finds the world magical, and it makes Stardust an enjoyable read. The story opens in the village of Wall in England when Queen Victoria was young. That’s vague but helpful because Queen Victoria was old far longer than she was young. As the name suggests, Wall is a solid fixture firmly set in our world, but the walled town borders Faerie, which is each “land that has been forced ..read more
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The Poet Taster
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
2w ago
Why does Homer's Muse disdain me?Why won't nymphs touch my flute?When heroes sail the wine-dark seawhy do I stay home and salute?When will I know love from lust?Why do both turn my brain to peat?Why are lies the only words I trust?Why is mud the only pie I eat?My miserable muse is a mouse in a cagewho refuses to obey my commandand when I touch the cold, chaste pageit slaps the dry pen out of my hand.Wicked muse, eat your stale cheesebut blow your foul breath on another fake,allow my feeble tongue to unfreezefor I've forms to fill and calls to makeand I'm nearing the end of my coffee break.Luv ..read more
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Fortunately, the Internet Has Everything You Need
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
1M ago
People always say to me Hey, Luvgood, you’re one cool dude. How can I be as cool as you? So I tell them: create a blog. And they respond Whoa, now. Shouldn’t I learn to walk before I try to run? And they have a valid point. Creating a blog isn’t easy.  It takes hours.  Fortunately, the internet has everything you need.  Several vendors will happily provide you with dozens of templates for a fee.  It’s like the Bible says:  if you have a dream and the money to pay for it, the internet will provide.  Once you’ve selected the best template you can afford, you need to ..read more
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Nefertiti N.Y.C.
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
1M ago
Crook Manifesto is the follow up to Colson Whitehead’s splendid Harlem Shuffle, but the 1960s are now in the Wayback Machine. This is New York City in the 1970s. Harlem is still Harlem, but the rest of the city is following its faltering lead. ”You knew the city was going to hell if the Upper East Side was starting to look like crap, too.” As always, the city is in transition. In one neighborhood it’s “Jews and Italians out, blacks in” and in another it’s the Spanish replacing the Germans and Irish. Fortunately, Ray Carney is still around, but he has transitioned too. He’s focused on his Harle ..read more
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Get Me the Slow Horses
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
1M ago
If you like spy novels and you’re not reading Mick Herron’s Slough House series, what’s wrong with you? Are you consumed with self-loathing? Are you mean to children? Not obnoxious children. I have no problem with that. I’m referring to nice children. Do you enjoy treating nice children badly? This isn’t me asking. It’s my neighbor. She loves this series, and she has excellent taste. I love the series too, but my taste is suspect. Spook Street is the fourth installment in the series. It brings back Jackson Lamb, the delightfully acerbic and misanthropic head of the slow horses, a group of Brit ..read more
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About the College – Updated to Include Vital Information About Barnacles
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
1M ago
Hello! As CEO of Pungent Sound Technical College of Technology, I can tell you we are proud to be a for-profit school.  In fact, it’s an honor to wake up every morning, see our students’ smiling faces on video, and know that we are exclusively devoted to serving our shareholders. The college is currently located on the tranquil waters of Pungent Sound.  It’s romantic, but don’t let the setting fool you.  The college is very difficult to get into.  Not in the academic sense – if you can pay the tuition, you’re in.  It’s difficult to get into physically, because the coll ..read more
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The Santa Cycle – Part 5
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
2M ago
It was the eighth shopping daybefore Santa jumps in his sleighand sprints around the worldon a trip fueled by meth and cocainestealing my cookies and all the acclaimfor the gifts I bought with a cardI'll no longer be allowed to retain.Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief ..read more
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The Children’s Crusade
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
2M ago
Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse-Five introduces us to Billy Pilgrim. He’s an American born in 1922, but he’s a senile widower who has “come unstuck in time” when we meet him. He can revisit any moment in his life as if he’s watching a video, and the novel consists of non-linear video clips of Billy’s life, including the time he was kidnapped by aliens, brought to Tralfamadore, and put in a zoo. The Tralfamadorians teach Billy about time and how it’s like looking at a stretch of the Rocky Mountains. ”All the moments, past, present, and future, always have existed, always will exist.” Except for ..read more
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Miss Disdain
Pungent Sound Journal of Pulp Poetry
by luvgoodcarp
2M ago
I met a girl whose smirk was firewhen on the edge of thirteen.I'd been a boy unblemished by desirebefore she burned her brand on me.Her disdain drove me to distraction.Her antipathy struck me as wise.She taught joy brings no satisfactionand contempt is Love's favorite disguise.Miss Disdain grew up and multiplied, and I have delighted in each Fury's spite.Knowing all the flaws that I hidetheir indifference can only be right.She was the alpha of all cruel passionswhose touch would make lesser men winceand in various forms and fashionsI've chased Miss Disdain ever since.Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-C ..read more
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