In our annual Q&A episode, Talli and Scott answer many questions and discuss numerous issues dealing with Judaism and intimacy, including whether avoiding sex before marriage means a likelihood of being sexually incompatible with your spouse, how to proceed when you start off shomer negiah and then... you're not, finding porn on your husband's intenet history, coping with changes in libido, defining Jewish sex, the halachic attitude towards using a condom, and more. We appreciate your many questions, and encourage you to continue being in contact with us ..read more

The shidduch crisis refers to the phenomenon in the  Orthodox Jewish community whereby eligible single persons, especially women, have difficulty finding a suitable spouse. While there are  definite differences between the way dating for marriage  is approached and conducted in the Hasidic, Yeshivish and Modern Orthodox worlds, there are also some similarities.  Recently, a research study was conducted to better understand and promote awareness regarding the struggles that many Orthodox Jewish daters face across the religious spectrum.  Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli ..read more

Whether divorced, widowed or never married, seeking a new relationship is complex. While each individual has his or her own unique experiences and perspectives, being unpartnered in midlife usually represents mourning for having loved and lost, or not yet having experienced the joy of partnered intimacy. Added to this for Orthodox Jews, are conflicts around non-marital physical touch. Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum in a discussion meant to encourage compassion to self and other, inclusion and hope ..read more

Numerous sources in our tradition demonstrate that sex in marriage must be mutual and consensual, and at no time can sex be forced or coerced. However, If a woman has been taught that she must do what her husband wants and she is responsible for protecting him from sin, she will fear the consequences of saying no.  In this episode, Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn discuss how non-consensual sexual dynamics can be built in to the system even as normative Jewish law forbids coercive sex.  We invite you to listen to this thought provoking and important discussion about the importanc ..read more

Pregnancy and childbirth are profound events in the life of a couple. The physical, psychological and hormonal changes that occur to women during pregnancy and in the postpartum period can impact both partners and affect emotional and sexual intimacy.  Couples must learn to adjust to a changed family system and a new identity as parents. Observant Jewish couples are additionally affected by laws that restrict touch during childbirth and in the postpartum period. In this episode, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss how pregnancy and childbirth as well as restrictions on physical t ..read more

Infertility and pregnancy loss affects relationships: with self, God, partner, family, friends and community. In part 2 of this two part series, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss the general implications of infertility and pregnancy loss on these relationships and on marital intimacy and sexuality. Listen  to Talli and Rabbi Scott discuss this as well as the specific considerations  for observant Jewish couples ..read more

The liturgy we recite on Rosh Hashana includes references to fertility and childbirth. God remembers Sarah, Rachel and Chana by answerIng their prayers for a child.  The poem “Hayom harat olam,” the ‘birth day’ of the world, evokes images of pregnancy. For individuals and couples struggling  with infertility or pregnancy loss, this can be triggering, painful and isolating. In the first of two episodes on infertility and pregnancy loss, Talli and Scott speak with Dr. Aimee Baron, founder of I Was Supposed To Have A Baby, a nonprofit organization that utilizes social media to support J ..read more

Last month, Orthodox Jewish journalist Avital Chizhik-Goldschmidt published an article in The Atlantic highlighting the popularity of Laura Doyle’s 2001 New York Times bestseller, ‘The Surrendered Wife,’ among Orthodox Jewish women. Doyle’s book provides a practical guide to marital bliss and harmony, suggesting that women  stop being critical and demanding of their husbands, respect and trust them, and regularly engage in self-care and “be vulnerable.”    Many would consider this to be sound advice, and Doyle’s devotees on social media have reported that their marriages underwe ..read more

Judaism values sexuality in the framework of marriage, both for the purposes of procreation and for relational intimacy. But does Judaism sanction the enhancement of physical pleasure, or should it be minimized? Do the Sages relate to pleasure differently in men and women, and how aware were they regarding the female experience of desire, arousal and orgasm? Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum as we discuss the “Jewish Pleasure Principle.” Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to get additional episodes, merch, and more! Just go to https://www.patreon.com/intimatejudaism ..read more

According to Jewish sources, God created humans as distinctly male or distinctly female. The roles, obligations and privileges of each gender are clearly defined in our tradition. Yet, not everyone conforms to the gender assigned to them at birth and some individuals experience their gender as distinctly opposite. Can Orthodox individuals who identify as non-binary or transgender find welcoming places, literally and figuratively, in Orthodox society? In this month’s episode, Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn speak with Rebitzen and social worker Daniela Weiss-Bronstein, about this important ..read more