Hello Erica55, I am very sorry to hear about your mum's passing, it is never easy saying goodbye to a loved one specially mum as they provide us with a special attachment and sense of safety. There is not much we can say to help you feel a little bit better, just allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel, (Sad, angry, happy, hopeful) without feeling any sort of guilt. if you are an Australian resident  I would like to suggest calling 131120 number if you need to talk to someone or find more information about some of our services. Sending you a virtual hugh Warm regards Susana Cance ..read more

Hi Erica55, I can understand your feelings and it’s just a part of the start of the grieving process. Plus you would be physically and emotionally exhausted. You need to recover and it will take time. When my beautiful mum died it was so difficult. And yes, the funeral is the last thing you do for your mum and then you fall in a heap?.  It’s now 3 years ago and I’m feeling better but still miss her every day. I hope you have people around you that you can be real with and will support you through this time. Sending you love and prayers ??. Linda  ..read more

My mum was diagnosed with metastatic lung cancer on the 4th of January 2024. They gave her a prognosis of 6-24 months. She got 2 months and 1 day. The past 2 and half months have been such a blur and it’s felt like 7. 2 days ago we had the funeral and now that I’m home, that I don’t have to put on a brave face for anyone, that I’m not running on adrenaline keeping myself consumed with planning my mums funeral, I feel so fucking lost and broken and drained. Losing your mum is hard but coping with the funeral being over is so much worse.  ..read more

I lost my sad around 9 months ago. My mother and I are definitely still in the denial phase. We have both noticed poor memory signs. It’s only recently I’ve discovered this can be caused by grief. Im sorry for your loss and at the same time it’s nice to know that we are not the only ones who are having problems with memory loss. Mum and I are both having problems with our short term memory and I my self can say, my sense of time also. I still feel like dad is out and he will be home soon or that he is in his room still, it’s so strange ..read more

I think grief is an important emotion.  I will grieve terribly if I lost my husband and I've always known that it will be really hard.   My mother had a stroke and was paralysed down one side.  She was in a nursing home for 10 years and I thought we grieved every day as slowly but surely she became weaker and more frail. My mother saw the time we had together as a wonderful bonus because she had the time to tell me all her stories and indeed it was a blessing. I thought I had let all my grief out slowly over those 10 years but no, I had still had more grief when she actually die ..read more

Definitely go and see a doctor and have your fears either confirmed or denied.  Worrying about having cancer is terribly debilitating.  You are 18 and have the best of life still to come.  You have a 50% chance of not carrying the gene.  Always try to find the positive because negativity will kill you.  Ask to have genetic testing done to be sure either way.  If you find out that you're safe, party, travel, love, find your purpose in life and live a full life in honour of your brother and your father.     I wish you well and hope you can find the co ..read more

So sorry for your loss. My Dad was in his seventies and that was hard to watch, I can only image how difficult it has been watching your young bother’s life change so dramatically. The end is brutal. All I can offer is that with time, the tears and bursts of grief do come less often, at least that has been true for me. Remember the good times shared and perhaps focus on a to do list of things you think he would have loved to see or do with you. Speak his name often so those around you can experience what he meant to you and offer their support. Good luck ..read more

In 2006 my grandmother passed away aged 68 from multiple myeloma after fighting for 5 years. Now there are better treatment options, that she unfortunately missed out on.  In dec 2022 her son (my dad) was diagnosed with aggressive pancreatic cancer. He is only 62 and still wants to fight. The oncologist recently told him that treatment / chemo won't work for him anymore and will soon begin palliative care. I know there is a new treatment for pancreatic cancer that is in a phase 2 clinical trial. Unfortunately my dad will miss out on this too.  My family are all devastated and I just ..read more

Hi Tom, I’m so sorry to hear about what happened to your brother. Your post really stood out to me because it’s exactly what happened to my older brother.  He was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer last May and died after only 5 months. I am so devastated and feel let down by doctors.  Bowel cancer treatment is primitive.  I have constant flashbacks of the pain and suffering my brother went through.  He was such a decent caring person. He was always nice to everyone.  I was so close him.  It’s killing me ?   How are you doing now?  Any advice on how I c ..read more

In 2016, my mother passed away at 62, peacefully in palliative care at home.    I was 21 at the time. Partying, coping in my own way, I distanced myself from the suffering, my other family members with experience and nursing, religion and care that was overwhelming, I couldn't connect with the new religion, I felt pushed out  I felt like there was nothing I could do. No one prepared me for what was happening and I didn't receive counselling. I wasn't able to process what was happening, it all happened so fast over four years of her fighting. The family that was around accused me ..read more