Align Your Expectations and Decrease Conflict
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
3w ago
Expectation. This single word can cause so much conflict in a relationship. At some point, we all have expectations in a partnership, such as how the other person will behave, think, or feel, and these expectations stem from our own world experiences and personal values. When our expectations are not met, we can feel irritated, neglected, or hurt; however, when our wants or needs are unspoken, this adds a level of complexity to the relationship that will almost ultimately end in an argument. Let’s take a peek at Brittany and Clive, who recently went on a romantic holiday but ended up arguing ..read more
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Learn Your Love Language
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
1M ago
We all have that special something that makes us feel loved. For some, it is a warm embrace; others may prefer a delicious home-cooked meal or spending time with their mates. Everybody is different, and we all feel and show love uniquely. This is the basis of the concept of ‘Love Languages ‘, a term originally coined by Dr. Gary Chapman. Love languages are the different ways in which individuals understand and express love. Often, we choose to show love in the same manner as we wish to receive it. However, a couple does not always speak the same love language. What is perceived as a loving ac ..read more
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Do you believe in forgiveness or revenge?
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
2M ago
This topic brings out many conflicting emotions; many of my patients admitted to struggling with the concept of forgiveness and letting go of grievances. Some of my patients feel they need to get even in order to feel vindicated, while others think they will be seen as wimps, especially if the grievance was done on purpose. It’s important to remember that this struggle is a normal part of the forgiveness process, and you are not alone in feeling this way.  While our knee-jerk reaction may be that we feel vengeful and want to get even, I encourage people to take a step back and think over ..read more
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A Story to Make You Smile…
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
3M ago
Have Road Anger? Think of Luigi One day last week, I heard from a previous patient of mine named Jim, whom I had not seen for 15 years. I had long forgotten he was in one of my anger management classes. He called to refer someone else and told me he had always remembered my story about Luigi, which I had shared many years ago. He said it cured his road rage problem. I thought I’d now pass it on to you. So, who is Luigi, and what does he have to do with road rage? Luigi was a little Italian guy with a handlebar mustache who always wore a sauce-stained apron and a big smile. He owned an Italian ..read more
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Part Two: Retreat and Think Things Over.
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
4M ago
Take the High Road. In my previous post, we learned what happens to our bodies in times of stress, how our brain releases stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, and how this quickly begins to course through our bodies, increasing our heart rate and blood pressure. In this post, I explain how to take the high road to de-escalate arguments and restore harmony in your marriage. The technique I teach is straightforward in theory, but it takes work, time, and practice. Having some basic rules to fall back on in times of stress helps. Rule #1 You, and only you, can apply this tool. You ca ..read more
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Retreat and Take Time to Think Things Over.
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
4M ago
How to Let Calmer Heads Prevail. Part one. Cassie and Phil loved each other dearly but often found themselves in heated verbal battles over almost anything and everything. The most minor disagreements quickly became a full-fledged war over who was right and who was wrong. This left Cassie and Phil feeling exhausted, emotionally disconnected from each other, nursing hurt, and harboring resentment that grew with each argument.  When an argument ensued, both immediately went on the defensive; their bodies moved into fight or flight mode, and they hurled insults and comments they would never ..read more
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Should You Forgive? The Power of Letting Go.
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
4M ago
Long-term relationships come with a myriad of challenges. From learning to accept quirks that grate your nerves to reconciling after a full-blown argument. Every relationship has highs and lows; it helps us grow together and understand and respect each other’s boundaries. We discover what we are willing to change within reason and what is a core part of us that is set in stone.  What happens when we hold onto resentment, nursing something from our past that caused deep hurt, and from this, an argument keeps recurring? An argument that, during times of stress, rears its ugly head and worm ..read more
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The Art of Procrastination
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
5M ago
This blog post has taken me some time to get around to… It is a testament to my stellar ability to push an article aside and hope it magically writes itself. Unfortunately, it never does. We are all culprits of procrastination; the path of least resistance beckons us all, especially after a hard day’s work. After dealing with job stress, a chaotic drive home, and kids fighting in the back seat over who touched who’s arm, I know many would prefer to kick back and relax than face problems in our relationship. It’s no secret that relationships can be challenging, but I often encounter a recurrin ..read more
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Playing The Blame Game: The Detrimental Impact of Avoiding Responsibility
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
5M ago
Life would be blissful and easy in a perfect world, and blame would never point in our direction. We could skate through life doing what we pleased, never being held accountable for our actions. Unfortunately, such a world does not exist, and we all must take responsibility.  While conflicts and disagreements are a normal part of any relationship, how a couple handles these challenges can significantly impact the dynamics of any relationship.  A common issue in my practice is when one partner blames the other and refuses to accept responsibility for their actions. This is a recipe f ..read more
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Coping Strategies, How to Survive Bullying from Authority Figures
The AngerCoach Blog
by Dr Tony Fiore
6M ago
Bullying is a distressing experience, especially when it originates from someone in a position of power or authority. When this happens, you can feel helpless and powerless to speak your mind for fear of retaliation, leaving you trapped between a rock and a hard place.  On the one hand, you would like to tell the bully precisely what you think of them; on the other hand, they know the power dynamic is squarely in their favor, and if you retaliate, the consequences may impact you heavily. This is a difficult situation that many people may relate to. So, let’s look into this topic a little ..read more
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