I've searched from Philadelphia to Baltimore and can't find any therapists (or treatment centers) who treat dissociation who take Medicare and offer in-person visits. (I'm not going to do virtual therapy. I tried that once.) I've talked about my dissociation which started 45 yrs ago with every Dr, therapist and hospital I've been to the last 25 yrs and NO one wants to discuss it. I've had all 4 stages of dissociation in my life mainly not being able to identify with myself and having derealization badly in my teens. I told the top Psychiatrist at Johns Hopkins that dissociation and severe mood ..read more

Well actually I found this forum (which lead me to do some reading). Some weird things about this... 1) I have known for a long time there have been periods in my life where I am not there. I have in the past described it like I am on the outside watching things happen but not being in control. Later I struggle to remember what happened. 2) I thought this was normal. Even when it came up in counselling I didn't think much of it. My counselor said I was disassociating but I just thought that's what everyone does in stressful/traumatic situations. But having done a little reading around it I ..read more

I have a diagnosis of MDD, c-ptsd, and dissociative disorder. I live alone, work part-time, and am so very lonely. There are days that I don't speak to another human being. I can feel my brain changing, and I'm afraid I might become a recluse. Im dissolving into myself. My dreams are more real than my waking life. I suppose I have to force myself to get out... Sent from my SM-A146U using Tapatalk ..read more

I’ve been dx’d with both by different docs and idk which is more accurate. I know BPD involves dissociation and identity disturbance, but not sure when this looks like or crosses the boundary into DID territory. Only one doc said DID and 3 said BPD so I’d go with that, but a gal can be curious about how the two are alike and different ..read more

I don't know which part I am in this system. But I exist. My belief this reality is a dream is not psychosis. We are hoping an angel saves us. We are many. We need help. Staring out my corner vision gives much relief. It makes me feel numb. It makes me feel like a robot. I am here. I exist. I seek help ..read more

It really really bothers me how I keep feeling my mom didn't take care of me when a child. People have told me that when I was an infant I was kept way too long alone naked in a dark room for extended periods. Drapes covered. Alone for my much older demon brother to enjoy torturing me every day. In all the photos of my mom back then she looked so depressed. So she had her own problems. Despite neglect, I had to hold on to her https://mysupportforums.org/album.ph...ictureid=68545 ..read more

We talked to Dr. Nanette De Fuentes Dr. Nanette De Fuentes, PhD, Psychologist, Glendale, CA, 91203 | Psychology Today She was the only one that seemed close enough to deal with our disorder but she said she's only doing virtual telehealth and that what we described needs to be in-person therapy. But there's no way we're going back to that. That was too stressful. No worries because we always have suicide hotline and the del amo psych ward. Oh and better yet we have healthNet through medical insurance which has instant therapists on-call. We've done that a lot before when we were feeling suici ..read more

Ugg I don't want to do this at all but I feel this constant nagging background feeling to interact with people and really have no clue. I don't yet feel myself. This is Paul the host. Everything feels like it's really spinning, this very uncomfortable dark feeling almost like when you've been sick with a bad flue or something. Supposedly I've been in the black void for a long time, like months ago when I was sooo close to selling everything and going to the forest to end from starvation. I don't have memories of much. Don't feel good. Can't shake this head spinning effect. It makes me very diz ..read more

Hi, this is adult Val, first time posting my name here. I age slide. I like using our new tool, Claude. It's helping me to understand our condition, which is helping me to feel better about myself. For example, lately I'm notice sudden changes where things here have changed. According to Claude, it's common for people to not even notice they have DID until their 40s and far beyond. And once they are diagnosed with DID later on in their life, it's common for DID symptoms to get worse and become more noticeable. My concerns is does this mean that one day we won't be able to drive or leave the h ..read more

I have amnesiatic dissociative disorder, though it is not quite as bad as it used to be. It used to freak me out, I called it losing time. It couldn't be due to anything cool like being abducted by aliens, it's my brain. Apparently I function okay, when like this, the times I have caught it people just say I am really quiet and do whatever I am doing. I didn't repress memories as a child this did happen till I hit 40, so it's weird ..read more