My husband, Hunter, and I reflect on the birth of our rainbow baby, Jonas. Admittedly it’s been much more difficult for me to find time to record and edit this podcast while taking care of a newborn full time. We recorded this episode three months ago and I am just now getting it out after finding little pockets of time during naps to record and edit. Though I want to continue to share about my postpartum and parenting after loss experience, new episodes moving forward will be more intermittent—I hope you understand!  Episode includes:  -How I cultivated peace on Jonas’ birthday -Ho ..read more

Part two of my conversation with Rachel George focusing on her book “Grieve, Create, Believe: Process Your Loss with Intention and Truth ” and her self-publishing journey. Through several years of experiencing miscarriage, infant loss, adoption, and the recent birth of another baby, Rachel wrote her book, Grieve, Create, Believe as a way to not only process her own grief through telling her story, but also to help others do the same. Rachel’s book acknowledges that we can’t escape suffering or run away from pain and helps guide readers through expressing and working through their grief to ulti ..read more

A conversation that includes Rachel’s story of miscarriage, infant loss, adoption, and the recent birth of another baby. Rachel shares her definition of rainbow baby, which is more complicated because of her experience losing two rainbow babies, Clive and Winnie. Through the unimaginable grief of losing two newborns to unrelated heart issues, Rachel and her husband found the courage to continue to pursue their dream to grow their family through the adoption of their daughter Corrie and another pregnancy that resulted in the birth of their son Miles. Throughout the years of these experiences Ra ..read more

I’ve faced some big milestones lately in my journey of pregnancy after loss. These have included making it to the same gestational week where my first baby was stillborn, having a baby shower, setting up the nursery, and taking maternity photos. I talk about how I’ve coped with fearful and anxious thoughts and ways that I’ve sought reassurance during these emotionally tender times. -Expressing grief through “mourning time” -Tips for dealing with sleepless nights and anxiety -Emotional ups and downs of Week 31 -Setting up our baby nursery -Not making decisions based on fear -What I did the morn ..read more

I can’t believe I’m finally entering my third trimester of pregnancy! In this episode I talk about… -managing my expectations and fears -dealing with aches and pains and prioritizing self-care -seeing a chiropractor -planning a drive-by baby shower and building a baby registry -the importance of kick counting -and deciding on a name for our baby — Show Notes: Count the Kicks App Kicks Count rainbow wristband ..read more

Hunter and I check in with each other a little over halfway through our current experience of pregnancy after loss. We talk about: -The differences between this pregnancy and our first pregnancy with Ellis -Milestones we’ve experienced so far in pregnancy after loss -Staying present when anticipating “loss date” anniversaries during pregnancy after loss -Fears we still have at this point and feeling comfortable planning for a future with the baby -The impact of COVID-19 on pregnancy and birth and creating a new image of our experience -Finding peace about our decision for a scheduled C-section ..read more

Week 20 of my current pregnancy…I talk about my mid-pregnancy anatomy scan and questions I had for my perinatal specialist about the topic of sleeping on your side during pregnancy. This was something that had started giving me anxiety as I was getting further along in the pregnancy because I had fretted that sleeping on my back might have caused Ellis’ stillbirth. The outcome of our conversation gave me much relief and I hope it’s helpful for you, too. I also share some tips for getting good sleep during pregnancy. — To connect with me visit taylorashleybates.com and find me on Instagram @tay ..read more

The past two weeks I’ve been away from social media and have instead spent lots of time reading, talking with people in person, praying, and mourning. I’ll never be able to fully understand the atrocities and injustices that Black people experience, but I do know grief. My instinct has been to go into a space of contemplation. We all need time to mourn and to process and internalize what has happened—to be sad, to be angry, to listen, to question, to be still, and to take action. Someone recently asked me how I feel about bringing a baby into the world right now with so much unrest. My respons ..read more

This is a very special episode featuring my conversation with Alissa Christensen, who’s baby Anna was stillborn two years ago today—May 20, 2018, the same day as my baby Ellis. She’s the only other loss mom I’ve met who’s baby shares that birthday. It’s also the 20th episode of this podcast, airing on Ellis and Anna’s second birthdays—May 20, 2020. I just love all the synchronicity. Alissa and I originally connected through Instagram after our babies were stillborn on the same day. She experienced a placental abruption that resulted in Anna’s stillbirth and almost took Alissa’s life as well. S ..read more

Because I know that this is often a complicated holiday for mothers who have lost babies. I talk about why I believe that mothers without living children are still mothers and also share how I felt my first Mother’s Day after Ellis was stillborn compared to this Mother's Day, a year later, being pregnant again after loss. I give my advice for supporting yourself or another loss mom on this day and include a short guided meditation for peace at the end. I hope this episode helps warm your heart a little today. — To connect with me visit taylorashleybates.com and find me on Instagram @taylorashl ..read more