I want to let y’all know what is going on in my life. There will be a pause in my articles, podcast, and videos until at least August. For the next two weeks or so I will be delivering our boat from the BVI to the USA.  Wait, WTaF? For those who don’t know, my family has been planning to live on a boat since before the pandemic. We are finally to the point of making the shift. We are selling our home and getting rid of most of our stuff. We are buying a boat and will move a very small amount of our stuff onto the boat. We will be living on the boat in Chesapeake Bay, USA until December wh ..read more

Have you ever sat down and thought about your values?  Values are important, motivating, and provide guidance. I’ve done a lot of values work in therapy and find it challenging. I value many things, but prioritizing the top five to ten is difficult and dynamic. One thing I have learned during over a decade of values work is that many human values suck.  I think a lot about universal or ‘optimum’ values Are there ‘optimum’ human values? For my purposes, optimum is an adjective meaning most favorable or desirable. The best. In biological systems, we can think of optimum in terms of hom ..read more

You don’t have to look far to find something to complain about.  Climate changeInequalitySuicidal ideationMalnutritionLoneliness  The world is full of problems. Now, I’m no doomer. My intent is not to illuminate human suffering. Rather, I accept the Buddhist notion that there will be suffering. My issue is all the EXTRA suffering. I can’t shake the naive, hippie belief that solutions are within our reach.  When it comes to the end of the world I’m an optimist. The question is, what can we do to reduce suffering? Isolation and ‘rugged individualism’ are a big part of the problem ..read more

Have you seen (or read) “2001: A Space Odyssey”? The story opens at the time of early humans. Folks are going about their business when a ginormous monolith appears. Everyone freaks out at first, but then some develop the ability to use bones as tools.  At first, I didn’t understand that the monolith represented punctuated equilibrium. This is a phrase used by evolutionary biologists to describe a quick shift in the fossil record representing a significant change. Compare this to gradualism, characterized by the slow accumulation of small changes.  As an impatient person, I prefer pu ..read more

The unexamined life is not worth living — Socrates It seems natural, even innate, to want to make the most of one’s life. To have a good life seems to require examination. Examining one’s life, growing, and continuing to be aware is part of our purpose. The purpose of life has two branches. The first is the ecological purpose and the second is more metaphysical. The ecological purpose of life is to reproduce to alleviate mortality. In other words, because all life dies, life reproduces itself. In this way, collective life persists despite the individual being terminal. Evolution and natural se ..read more

Do you suffer? Humans have problems. It’s hard to deny.  Despite many pleas for ‘looking on the bright side of life’, we live in a world full of suffering. For whatever reason, I think about these problems, the causes, and potential solutions.  While it is difficult to maintain a positive mental attitude and growth mindset, I strive for a balance. I consider how we might improve humanity while not getting bogged down in depression. I think existence consists of two main branches. These are the biological or physical, and the spiritual or metaphysical. You probably have different name ..read more

Do you ever think about your comfort zone? I’m sure most people are at least aware of the concept. To me, our comfort zone is like an invisible egg that surrounds our physical body. Near the center, we are, well, comfortable. As we near the edges we become less comfortable.  Our comfort zone is like a sixth sense. It is more a bodily feeling or awareness than an identifiable sensation. Approaching our comfort zone is unlike hearing, smelling, touching, tasting, or seeing. Why do we experience these comfort zone sensations? The purpose of our comfort zone is to alert us when our environmen ..read more

Does science play a role in your life?  Do you value hard data and evidence? Do you think humans are good at proving things? Or maybe you defer to religion or culture to decide what is real? I talk a lot about how science is over or undervalued. Some folks think science proves reality. Others think scientists are full of crap. Regardless of how you feel about science, the scientific method is regarded as one of the best tools we have to help us answer questions. One of my favorite questions is, “Is there a better way to live?” My work focuses on understanding how humans can suffer less ..read more

Do other people ever make you angry? I’d be worried about you if you said no. Or assume you are the Dalai Lama.  Many of us struggle to find connections to people we disagree with. Or people who act out, are annoying, or mean. I preach a lot about how we are all connected, and how we need to love one another and participate in our communities. But it is so very hard, sometimes, to love everyone or to want to connect. If you struggle with truly feeling connected to people, this article is for you. Have you ever considered reincarnation?  I never used to think about it. I don’t know wh ..read more

Have you ever wondered how any two people can have a conversation and walk away feeling both like they were heard and believing they heard the other person? It blows my mind how limiting conversation can be. As magical as language is, it leaves so much room for error. Words mean different things to different people. We hear one thing when they mean another. Context matters. We have different life experiences. There are so many layers that make it easy to misunderstand. Language, like any technology, is wrought with at least as many restrictions as benefits. Yes, we can be more complex in our d ..read more