So, this topic has been brought up twice this week by new clients... basically, inquiring about the online deception known as catfishing. This is when an individual is not who they claim to be; a dishonest practice where someone creates a false persona online. (With clearly malicious intentions!). As a dating advisor, with over 25 years of experience as a dating coach---due to the significant rise in online dating just in the last 5 years (even though it started in the 90s with a negative reputation, have I encountered this? A few times. But not so much in recent years as singles become mo ..read more

I often think about this---and I’m a huge proponent of yes, absolutely, positively be selective in choosing your partner. Then, yesterday happened. I was being interviewed by the Wall Street Journal for an in-depth article on dating over 40---specifically targeting the 45-68-year-old crowd. Her angle: 2nd Acts in Dating. Oh, easy interview for me—I do this all day long, I thought to myself.  (And, my upcoming book is all about this topic). We started with this scenario:  A 55-year-old professional woman went on 38 dates over the last six month with OLD (online dating), had ..read more

As a dating coach for over 28 years and over 30,000 clients, this is a frequent question I get.  I’m successful, have plenty of friends, a solid social life and interests and when I put my mind to something, I generally accomplish it. So, why am I still single? Well, let me tell you, it's not because of the universe, or the lack of single men/women, or your age, or where you live. Nope, it's all you! You're keeping yourself single. You don't work at it, you're stuck in your comfort zone, and you keep procrastinating. It's time to get out there and make it happen! I know, all easy ex ..read more

So, you probably woke up this morning thinking about grilled hamburgers, why Joey Chestnut is not in the Nathan’s Hot Dog eating contest this year, our Nation’s 248th Birthday and our President's love lives.... 1.      George Washington, our First President:  There are two stories about Martha and George’s courtship: the first, they met during the much-touted society Williamsburg season, and the second they spent the night at a house party (not together) and were introduced by Colonel Chamberlayne. BTW: While he remained loyal to her for 40 years until hi ..read more

 Wondering if you should go on a second date? It's like trying to decide if you should eat that last slice of pizza - you're not sure if it's a good idea, but you're also not ready to let it go. Sometimes it’s just not clear.   Deciding whether to go on a second date can be a tough decision. After meeting for lunch, you may have found the interaction enjoyable but lacking that special spark. Perhaps during a drinks date, you were attracted to your date but felt like they dominated the conversation without asking about you. Or maybe during a coffee and walk, there were awkwar ..read more

   Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you walked away and suddenly felt a sense of Freedom? Perhaps it was a toxic workplace, a harmful relationship, or distancing yourself from a negative friend. The outcome, however, was a huge feeling of relief as if a heavy burden had been lifted off your chest. A healthy relationship should never make you feel that way. You deserve to feel comfortable, unrestricted, and able to be your genuine self in a relationship. So, what are the signs?   1.      Chemistry. All good relationships have a hug ..read more

As a dating coach for the past 25+ years, I counsel my clients at 33000Dates.com on a weekly basis---from choosing the right dates online, how to write a dating profile,  selecting the right site, to how to message men, and how to set up that first in-real-life-date. So, here’s my past week and what my single clients learned: Lesson 1:  You may kiss a lot of frogs until you meet the “one”.Carrie, 37, a dentist from NYC has been my client for the past 2.5 months and gone on 4-5 first dates each month on average.  Two weeks ago, she was discouraged---ready to give up ..read more

Ten unedited questions from Sarah* for my bi-monthly 10 Question Column (*name changed) Andrea: I loved talking to Sarah---even when we'd hit a wall with men we found online. She's a 61-year-old attorney and judge, widowed. What stood out about having Sarah as a client? a. She never gave up---we'd have serious talks during our sessions but often interspersed with laughter (we did laugh a lot!) b. It's all about timing---as you will see below. It's got to be the right person at the right time. c. She was so open---never discounted anyone immediately. (Except Peter who she went out with several ..read more

Save yourself the time, effort, and disappointment. One great advantage of celebrating another birthday is gaining another year of wisdom. (So many of my clients had May/June birthdays....this got me thinking). With our accumulated life experiences, we should be able to recognize certain patterns or trends in the individuals we choose to date. As a dating coach, there are some red flags that may go unnoticed. Here are a few types to be cautious of: 1. The “Just ended a long-term relationship” type This individual has recently come out of a lengthy relationship, whether it be a 10, 20, or ..read more

Ohhh, you are thinking, wow, Andrea, did you wake up negative? Wrong side of the bed?  No, just realistic.  This had been front and foremost in my mind this week as a dating coach---both from the perspective of listening to people’s rationalizations about OD (online dating) and potential clients who may want to use me as a coach—and their litany of excuses. Ok, do you want the good news or the bad news?  I’m going to start with the bad---and what I’ve been listening to this week from intelligent people. Here we go: 1.      Your photos aren't doing ..read more