Agreement #4: Always Do Your Best “Under any circumstances, always do your best, no more and no less. But keep in mind that your best is never going to be the same from one moment to the next.”   The Fourth Agreement is the action of the first three, enabling them to become habits. It is the agreement that asks you to do just enough, but not too much. Perfection is not the goal .. Doing your best means falling down and getting back up.  Ruiz says “If you try too hard to do more than your best, you will spend more energy than is needed, and in the end, your best will not be enough. Wh ..read more

Agreement #3: Don’t Make Assumptions “The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth.” — The Four Agreements, Chapter 4 The Third Agreement is similar  to the Second Agreement: Don’t take anything personally. We assume our reality is the same as someone else’s reality, so we fit whatever they do or say into how we view the world. We create stories around our reality.  As  you all are aware,  we cannot read another person’s mind and know what they’re thinking, but there are times we act like we can!  Do you ever read into texts, or emails  ..read more

Agreement #2: Don’t Take Anything Personally “Personal importance, or taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about ‘me’.” — The Four Agreements, Chapter 3   Yes, taking things personally is all about ourselves; our ego. We think the world revolves around us and everything people do is specifically targeted to us.   How We Personalize Ruiz believes that nothing other people say or do is because of us. It is because of themselves. How other people relate to us often depends on their mood, so if we base o ..read more

The First Agreement - Be Impeccable With Your Word Why is your word so important? Because, according to Ruiz, it is your power to create. “What you dream, what you feel, and what you really are, will all be manifested through the word.” It’s all connected, and what you say matters. This includes what we say to ourselves as well as what we say to others. Our inner voice is often the most destructive because it draws from our negative core beliefs: I’m not good enough, smart enough, worthy of love, deserving of happiness, etc. So what does it mean to be impeccable with your word? From its Latin ..read more

THE FOUR AGREEMENTS By Don Miguel Ruiz 1. BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power your word in the direction of truth and love. 2. DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of your own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. 3. DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS Find the courage to ask questions and express what you really want. C ..read more

1. Take a break/Don’t be afraid to feel it/Write it out - Things have a way of working themselves out and once we lean into “letting go” typically things will work out.  If you can write out what you are feeling when the world that's crumbling around you, this excercise will help you refocus and you will have a clearer picture of what's going on. Once you do, you can reassess the situation and figure out the best course of action. 2. Get support - Don't hesitate in asking for help, this means having to put your ego aside. Whether if it's getting some outside therapy, asking advice, having ..read more

1. Body Acceptance and modeling positive body image. Mothers have a huge impact on their daughters’ body image.  Think about how they will mimic our behaviors, Don’t ask, “Do these jeans make me look fat?” or obsess food or  appearance.  Things to do:             Appreciate all that your body can do.             Write down what you love about yourself             Beauty is more than skin deep             Look at yourself as a whole person       ..read more

1. Show Compassion to yourself first Allow yourself to really feel what you are feeling. Be compassionate with yourself just as you would with a friend or your child. Ask for support if you need it.  2. Awareness of the pain of self-pity Feeling sorry for yourself not only creates pain for you but it creates pain for others too. Not many people want to be around you if you are always down.  Instead of seeing that as something else to feel hurt about, become aware of the pain you are creating for yourself. No one can make you feel anything, only you control the way you feel. 3. NO VIC ..read more

Learning to Rely on the "other" Co-Parent”, not an easy thing to do.  It is a tough order to depend on the other co-parent especially if there have been trust issues in your past relationship with them. Vincent de Paul is recorded as having asked:  “What do you think is most often the cause of our failings in our resolutions? It’s that we depend too much on ourselves, we put trust in our good desires, we rely on our own strength, and that’s the reason we don’t get any good results from them.”  Here are some tips to help you be more accepting of help from others. Learn to be vu ..read more

We can sum this up in one word: easy. Co-parenting is not easy.   Parenting is already no cakewalk, and when you add in the stress of a raising a child together after a divorce or separation, it’s a situation that can be filled with tension and disagreements.  Good communication is the key to a positive co-parenting experience. Putting the sole focus on your children rather than on yourself or your ex is the first step toward ensuring success. Co-parenting is not easy, but it’s worth the extra effort for the health and well-being of your children. Here are some other things that co-p ..read more