I’m a mother on the autism spectrum raising two children with autism, one with Level 1 Autism and one with Level 3 Autism. I’ve been enjoying giving talks all over the country. Send me an email at eileen@theautismcafe.com to discuss opportunities. Over the past few years, I’ve declined many speaking opportunities, primarily due to fear. It’s been a persistent struggle since childhood—whenever I’ve had to present in front of a group, I’ve burst out laughing out of nervousness. It still happens during work meetings, and the thought of it happening in front of hundreds of people paralyzes me. How ..read more

How to access respite care in Texas? Today, in just 25 minutes, Charlie displayed everything I’ve been trying to convey to the necessary authorities regarding his extreme and dangerous behaviors—aggression, spitting, self-injury, and pica. Here, services are scarce, and the waiting lists for respite care in Texas are decades long. Recently, I received a letter stating it would be an additional 15 years before Charlie made it to the top of the list. There’s a way to access services earlier through a “diversion spot,” reserved for the most extreme cases—kids in crises at risk of institutionaliza ..read more

An article was recently published about ABA Therapy in The New Yorker, and though it attempted to be balanced, there were many issues with it. Who am I to speak on the subject of ABA Therapy and provide feedback on The New Yorker article? I’m an autistic mother of three children, two on the spectrum, one of whom with profound autism. I’m also a published author and a podcast host. My oldest, Charlie, has been in ABA Therapy full-time for over nine years, since his autism diagnosis at two. His autism is best described as severe, level 3, nonverbal, and profound, and it’s come to define him more ..read more

Autism has taught me to expect the unexpected from strangers in public. This week, I received a wonderful surprise! I took Charlie to the doctor to make sure his nose wasn’t broken after a particularly violent episode of self-injurious behaviors in ABA Therapy. I’ve been more vocal about the challenges Charlie faces due to his profound autism and this is one of the hardest ones. To those strangers in the waiting room, thank you ❤️ In a minuscule, crowded waiting room, I sit with Charlie, waiting for the doctor’s verdict on whether his nose is broken or just badly bruised. Three other boys arou ..read more

“Cut her hair. It’s always in her eyes. Drives me crazy” Instagram User I’ve been getting variations of this message at least once a day. I’ve started ignoring them. If it’s you, don’t take it personally, but that’s not your decision to make. The reason why I won’t cut my toddler’s hair? Why don’t I cut her hair? Because we just need to get past the awkward half-length bangs before we can easily swoop her hair behind her ears. Right now, clips fall, and she pulls headbands off her head. Most importantly, you may be bothered by her hair, but she’s not. ? The post No, I won’t cut my toddler’s ha ..read more

Charlie has profound autism. Charlie’s struggles are severe and life-threatening. Charlie has no sense of danger, which manifests in different ways, like running in front of cars. The most upsetting manifestation is called Pica. Eileen Lamb When I was pregnant with my firstborn, Charlie, I daydreamed about motherhood. I pictured Charlie as a child sitting beside me outside at sunset, debating which Pokémon is a better starter option in Pokémon. I imagined a toddler yelling “no” because I gave him the green sippy cup instead of the red one. I pictured Charlie running to me while screaming, “Mom ..read more

Pica: When your son with profound autism eats non-edible items… Not the happiest start to the year, but I’ve made the difficult decision to give away Charlie’s custom ball pit. I had someone build it for him for his 10th birthday… Charlie was tearing it apart and eating it. The foam on the inside, the rubber on the edges, and lately, the wood… Pica is awful. We had already stripped Charlie’s room of pretty much everything else due to safety concerns. We were hoping to be able to keep the ball pit, but Pica won that battle too. Right now his room has a bed, a play couch and a trampoline. That’s ..read more

We need more autism and PICA awareness Let’s talk about autism and pica. I’ve been trying to share the positive side of Charlie’s journey because I know it resonates with many. I cherish those moments too, but the truth is, they’re not our everyday reality. Outside of the heartwarming moments I post on social media, our daily life is often filled with fear and frankly, sadness too. Here’s a glimpse into what Charlie has been trying to eat lately… There’s been no improvement since the GI pulled a screw out of his colon. He relentlessly tries to swallow everything around the house that’s not mea ..read more

To the parents awaiting services or evaluations for their autistic kiddo…I’m thinking of you. To the mom, overwhelmed that health insurance went up again…you’re not alone. To the autistic person, drained after masking for two full weeks of holidays…I know, I’ve been there too. To the parent who’s stayed clear of social media because the holiday posts highlight everything their child can’t yet do…I’ve done the same exact thing. To the dad who’s celebrating because, on her eighth Christmas, their daughter opened a present for the first time…I’m cheering with you and hope 2024 brings many more su ..read more

Halloween and Autism This one goes out to people who will be handing out candy at Halloween and crossing the path of people with autism. Some who are nonverbal. Just a reminder to be kind to everyone this Halloween. ?? Be kind to the child who can’t say “trick or treat”. Be kind to the adult in a Superman costume. Be kind to the little girl who doesn’t say “thank you”. Be kind to the child who doesn’t understand he’s not supposed to go inside your house. Be kind to the child who’s not wearing a costume. Be kind to the little boy who speaks very loudly. While you may think these behaviors are d ..read more