Narcissistic mothers, fathers and partners have one thing in common – to them, you will never be good enough. As a partner to a narcissistic person, you will be lifted up in the beginning, praised and feel like you finally are seen for the amazing person you are. As a child, you don’t get that luxury. You are lifted and praised, but only when it benefits the narcissist and often in the company of others, who will then look at the narcissistic parent and turn to you, saying how lucky you are to have a parent like that. Behind the scenes however, the narcissist will make you feel that no matter ..read more

Psychopathy seems to be a brain abnormality. Narcissism is learned. When there is no room for the child’s personality, needs and desires, they can become attention addicts. Combine that with unhealthy communication, emotionally invasive parents – and a little spice – and you have a narcissist. The thing that separates the narcissist who cannot heal and a person with narcissistic traits, who can learn, heal and grow, is that the damage is done so early they have never felt any form of love, nurishment or connection with their parents. This means they have no foundation to build on when healing ..read more

When you realize that one of your family members – or your spouse – is a narcissist and you make up your mind to leave them and walk away, you will most likely feel guilty. Know this: The guilt you feel at this point is not real. This guilt is the result of brainwashing that narcissists has been doing for a long time. It stops you from choosing to save yourself and getting a chance to grow and discover yourself. The unreal guilt tricks your brain so you think that you cannot turn your back and leave them – you owe them. To get rid of this unreal guilt, you can think of it as an addiction. Just ..read more

Narcissists have developed the habit of lying so well that they can even believe their own lies. One of my clients once told me that her husband who is a narcissist was once annoyed and called her a cow at a party when he was drunk. She mulled over how to deal with it and confronted him a few days after the incident. He insisted that he had not said that and that he would never say that to her. He was so convincing that she became unsure if she had ever heard her husband call her a cow. Narcissists have trained their minds to believe in the lies they tell others. They can never accept that the ..read more

When you have chosen to go No Contact with the narcissist, you can experience missing them so much it hurts physically.. This can be confusing for you too. You are doing better without the narcissist but why are you missing them? The narcissist has trained your brain and manipulated you in a way that you think you cannot live without them.. The narcissist’s best weapon is brainwashing and planting this thought in your brain that you will never be able to survive without them. The abusers often tell the victims that they are nothing without them. The narcissist – whether it’s spouse or a parent ..read more

Narcissists suffer from a deep lack of a sense of self. The sense of self is developed very early – before the child starts to speak and this is one of the reasons it is very difficult to work with this issue in talk therapy – the sense of self is exactly that – a sense. This is why narcissists are committed to fabricating a self, one more lovable in the eyes of others. To do so, they are attracted to people who have what they want. They will say “We are the same” to you, but over time, they will discover that they are nothing like you. They cannot contain this pain and instead they will try t ..read more

When you have decided to leave, you have to put behind you the idea that your partner is an emotional equal and that the process can be adult and friendly. Because disruption is the core of the narcissist, that will never happen. So when you’re ready to leave emotionally, you don’t tell them that. Here’s what you do: Things can VERY easily get ugly, so get a divorce attorney. Let them guide you. NEVER take any Advice, Counsel or direction from the person you are divorcing. Everything he&she says is ONLY to benefit them in the end. Don’t talk to the person you are divorcing, because if you ..read more

Get the answer to all this in writing, when you’re meeting with your lawyer and your ex. The more detailed agreements you have, the less you have to talk to them and the less risk of arguments you have. You already know that narcissists are above laws and rules, so your best bet of a less dramatic co-parenting is to have everything in writing with your lawyer present. Who pays for cell phones? Who pays for cars? Who pays for car insurance? Who pays for deductible? Who pays for class trips? Who pays for school uniforms? Who pays for co-pays on Medical Expenses? Who pays for Yearbooks? Who pay ..read more

Dating can be a thrilling adventure, but it’s a lot easier and straining to navigate the journey with a strong sense of self and healthy boundaries. Establishing and maintaining boundaries is crucial for building fulfilling and respectful relationships. Defining Healthy Boundaries: Healthy boundaries are the emotional, physical, and mental limits we set for ourselves in relationships. They help us establish what we are comfortable with, what we expect from others, and what behavior we find acceptable. For instance, a healthy boundary could be establishing personal space and alone time in the ..read more

Going on dates can be like looking for a needle in a haystack, especially if you don’t know much about the person you’re meeting. That’s why it’s essential to ask the right questions before the date. By doing so, you can save yourself a lot of time, money, and potential heartache. One question you should ask is what the other person is looking for in a relationship. This question will help you determine if you’re both on the same page. If they’re looking for something casual, and you’re looking for something serious, then it’s best to know that before you invest too much time or energy into th ..read more