Pain is a great indicator of healing they say. Pain is a sign of recovery. Pain is a gracious reminder our bodies are compromised, in need of attention and care. But it requires us to slow down, to stop, to pause, to take more time and effort over our steps, our breathes. Pain reminds us we have been knocked, we have been bruised, we have been struck down. It confronts us with the fragility of our bodies. Demands we adjust, change pace or position. This week has been painful. I have been rendered weak, fearful, shaken and knocked down. All my hopes…. no all my plans for the week required a ..read more

We live our lives in fear. Fear that grips our hearts, overrules our emotions, drives our decisions, flows from the deepest places of our hearts. Fear that influences our words, actions, dictates the times we speak and chokes our words, catching them in our throats and rendering us speechless. Fear that affects our bank balances, our use of time, our parenting, friendships and marriages. There is no escaping a life of fear. But there is an escape, a rescue, a wonderful redemption and salvation from the death of captive fear, an existence of deathly enslavement to fear, into a life of fear ..read more

A groom beholding his bride walking towards him overcome by the beauty of the moment, the glory of his beloved. The gasping overcome breathe of a father as his firstborn enters the world and he holds fast his weary wife and precious child in fearful, protective embrace. Breathless, tearful goodbyes between lovers soon to be separated. The choked tender goodnight kiss of a weary mother impressing quivering lips to the peacefully sleeping child, no longer fighting restlessly. I love you So much desire, pain, hope, history, excitement, wonder and awe bound up within the phrase, the word. Yet ..read more

When confronted with an immensity that overwhelms, a world that seems incomprehensible and unattainable, we can begin to wonder where we fit in. Do I have a place? Am I noticed? Our selves begin to panic, become focused and intent on establishing a place, of creating an impression, of securing validation. Focusing with increasing clarity, vision, intent until the immensity that fuelled our motivations becomes blurred in the narrowing pursuit of self. Or do we fear, retreat, step back and away from the threat, put up the barriers, make the defences secure, limit the space and confine to th ..read more

Training complete. Final preparations done. All that’s left to do is that first step across the start line. Follow the course mapped out for you. For all of you. Runners lined up. All set out on the same path. So much to share, with so much to separate. One course unfolding for each runner a different race. Distinct, powerful motivations of every heart leading them to this race, each so personal. Every step a gain, full of purpose, intent, focus. Every misstep and stumble a temptation to stop, a threat to your place. It’s the grit and gruel of the race. But there is a race marked ou ..read more

I see the weight of the worry you bear The fear of tomorrow’s offering. I see in your eyes the weight of your fear Having nothing on which others may lean I hear in your voice the uncertainty and pain Fighting to run, or hide or give in I hear in your voice the relief just to speak, To choke out the pain all-consuming Look up my love and behold Him there Your Friend and Saviour and King Look up and see the Bearer of all Your darkness and deep sorrowing Look up and Behold Him in all his glory The only one able and willing To raise up your heart out of despair And fix it securely in Him His ..read more

Tidying up my younger daughter’s bedroom usually results in unearthing a treasure trove of hoarded goodies. Shells under the pillow, gems under the bed, special pens stashed away in toy boxes. Scissors that have been banned secretly hidden from plain sight behind the innocent crowd of dolls and teddies at the end of the bed. Treasure stored up. Stored away. Kept hidden for fear of others laying claim to these prized possessions, or often desired possessions. As I find different items scattered around my little girl’s room, they reveal her little heart to me. Sometimes revealing her empatheti ..read more

First memories. First day at school. First love. First heartbreak. First failure. First loss. What would you include in your life history? I had to complete a life chronology form recently and it struck me how I judged my ‘significant moments’ and how many ‘firsts’ made the list. The form itself asked for a value judgement on these events and required an assessment of whether the significant event was deemed ‘good, bad or neutral’. We encourage self reflection and retrospection on our lives and this is a great thing. However, as I was filling in the form, I became increasingly frustrated by ..read more

As soon as she learnt to walk, my younger daughter learnt to hide. Blink and you’d miss her. We’ve spent many a panicked moment in the park, the supermarket, museums. We’ve had most of a wedding party looking for her. She’s been found up trees, lying on supermarket shelves, inside laundry baskets, and wardrobes. She thinks it’s hilarious and still now at 5, she’ll jump out with a ‘Boo’ and wonder what all the fuss is about. Unless of course, she’s hiding to avoid doing something she’s been asked or avoid being told off. As I was putting her to bed the other night she noticed I’d spotted the ..read more

I wonder how many times you’ve heard or said these words: ‘Appreciate your time with your children now. It goes so quickly.’ How those words can encourage and bless on the good days where time flies! How those words can inflict guilt and breed resentment on the bad when time seems to stand still! How often are those words heard or spoken now to struggling parents living without the usual socialising, support and of course school? For all the moments in the newborn days those words just raised my anxiety and fear and increased my guilt that there was far more arduous survival than appreciat ..read more