Photo by Alex Green I am what some may call a failure. I’m unemployed, with two kids, in debt, and no business to my name. That is my life right now. This post is not a feel-good or a how-to guide to making money. It’s for my fellow failures, those who are still trying to figure out how to get it right, who haven’t found the algorithm yet. As long as we’re failing, I believe it’s best we do it together. It makes the landing a little easier. The new year has begun, and I’m sure we’re all thinking about how old we’re turning this year. For some of us, it will be a difficult transition. Last ..read more

Photo by Nick Dunlap on Unsplash It is rebirth, a new period for me. That is the best word I can use to describe the place I am in right now. I moved out of our family home with my two children. In truth, it is my first time living as the only adult in the house since college. I have always had my siblings around, if not my mother. I wanted this truly, to have my new beginning. So many things were going wrong in my life, and I longed for better. I will be turning 30 in a few months, and I had this constant gnawing in my gut that I will have the next best ten years ..read more

Photo by Delano Ramdas on Unsplash It is another year, and some of us are turning the big 3Oh. Three what?! I cannot believe I am almost through with my twenties. They were something. 2022 is my year; it is all our year. That is pretty much how we begin each new year. The start of a new year gives us renewed strength to follow our paths, conquer our demons and fulfill some wishes we had for years. So, we say it is time. Now is the time. Most of us write down everything we would like to achieve, subject to where we are. However, we water down some of those goals. W ..read more

Photo by Andy Li on Unsplash “He who does not really feel himself lost, is lost without remission; that is to say, he never finds himself, never comes up against his own reality.” ― José Ortega y Gasset I wake up almost every morning with a clear bearing of what I should do. This usually includes making breakfast, waking up my kids, and preparing and taking them to school. Afterward, it’s usually one house chore or another, and then I have 8–10 hours of being productive to the world or trying to be. When I’m employed, this part is easy. I have a set of objectives to complete a ..read more

Photo by Ismael Sanchez from Pexels I heard your favorite song last night. The one you loved dancing to at night. Do you remember it? You don’t listen to music anymore and don’t dance as much as you did. I know you’ve been climbing a steep hill and are walking a very narrow road right now. But there is more to life, better things. You need to believe that. Hold on to it tightly. Let’s make it to the other side together. I forgive you. But you’re carrying too much. Let go. Just place it down and leave it there. You don’t need it right now. Those are past things; lo ..read more

Photo by Frank Cone from Pexels I know you are waiting for me to tell you I am bluffing, but I am not. There is no better tomorrow. The world is crying and hurting right now, still doing ridiculous TikTok challenges, and people are getting richer. That is just how it is. Meanwhile, I am trying to make $120; make rent this month. I have always read the advice on positivity adherence and given it too. And I assure you, I do not deny the negative side of life. It is real. I try to put out work that is encouraging and inspirational. That is the first thing that w ..read more

Photo by Marc-Olivier Jodoin on Unsplash Why am I still alive? I ask myself. But the better question is, how am I still alive? I have just spent two hours on the balcony wondering what is to come. The advice is to stick to the present, but mine is bleak. I am crushing under mountains of debt I have no idea how I will repay. Recently, I moved into a new home with my kids, which I wanted, but I did not think I would have this much on my shoulders. A week ago, I could not sleep. I was worried, tossing and turning, trying to figure out a way to make rent this month. I ..read more

Image by Larisa Koshkina from Pixabay I had one, if not the worst day of my life, last Saturday. I woke up feeling down and out physically and mentally. That day, I thought to myself, if there is a good day to embrace death, that would be it. I am always affected either physically or mentally but not both at the same with such intensity. I cry. That is what I do when I feel drained, and it helped a little. Then, I thought to call my partner and friends, ask them how they are, and tell them I am here if they need anything. That is the other thing that helps me, having o ..read more

Photo by Snapwire from Pexels I never thought we would be together. My friends knew this. I had told them there was no way I could date you. Yet here we are now, seven years later, and two kids between us. It is not that I liked you or did not like you at first. I was not feeling you as you were me. Now, I love you. P said that you looked violent, and I laughed. She warned me to be careful. You might lay a hand on me, she said. Your height and build were a bit intimidating at first. She also said you did not look like a pure breed local and had me bursting out loud. It ..read more

Photo by Shelby Deeter on Unsplash So I wished my partner Happy Birthday. Well, it was not his but that of his dead girlfriend. I regret doing that; I should not have. He was away for work when I texted him, and he replied. Said some wounds and gaps never heal. His answer triggered something in me. Suddenly I was sad, and I started crying. Something in me had just told me to wish him, and I did. I got the date wrong. The funny thing is that I was wrong; it was a day before, he corrected me. Afterward, he said even though those wounds had not healed, he thanked God for Life. It t ..read more