
Modern Mommy Madness
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My name is Harmony. I am a freelance writer, wife, and mom of three. I made a name for myself writing humour content revolving around alcohol and motherhood. Then, in 2017, I got sober. I'm excited to share my story and chipping away at the stigma that surrounds alcoholism, addiction, and the silent struggles that plague so many modern women - particularly mothers.
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
Why bother?
Because right now, there is someone
out there with a wound
in the exact shape of your words.
***
I saved this image to the desktop of my computer because it’s getting to the point over here where I don’t have the desire to write. Why add my voice to the already-crowded chaos of things happening on the internet? What more is there to say or to add?
The exhaustion of these past few years is taking a toll, and I’ve done everything I can think of to avoid writing. I’ve organized closets, vacuumed cobwebs from the highest corners of our ceilings, picked up paint flakes that my middle c ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
I’ve been in therapy for going on five (FIVE) years now, and I don’t mean a little therapy here and there. We’re talking regular therapy that we paid for out of pocket. The kind of therapy that requires me to keep notes in a special notebook and complete assignments and do a lot of hard things I don’t feel comfortable doing.
I’ve written fuck you letters to people I love and people I hate and burned them in a rusted out barrel that sat in the corner of our old backyard. I’ve toyed with hypnosis. I’ve completed EMDR and inner child work.
One time Robyn the therapist made me look in a mirror and ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
Several weeks ago, during one of my daily sessions of mindless scrolling, I saw a job posting for a Copywriter position at a big company. It was full-time and paid well, so I applied. The weird thing is, I’m not looking for a job. I don’t even have time to have a job.
I routinely do this thing when my life starts to feel overwhelming: I start thinking that the answer to all of my troubles is to get a full-time job, because then I’d have a legit excuse to be somewhere at a specific time and the additional income would easily cover the cost of hired help to shuttle my children to and fro. It wou ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
This year, the first day of school happened to fall on a Wednesday, which is also Robbie’s day off. I was an absolute wreck worrying about sending our three children, two of whom are too young to be vaccinated, off to school during this catastrophically huge surge of the Delta variant.
In the days leading up to last Wednesday, it felt like my stomach was chewing itself from the inside out, my hands and feet were constantly sweaty, and I found myself walking in circles around the house, unsure of how to go through with the act of sending them to school during a pandemic. At the same time, thank ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
Oh, hi.
Want to know the truth?
Since March 2020, I’ve really struggled to write freely, especially here on my blog. How can I, when what I want to write about involves other people? The old Harmony wouldn’t have given writing about other people a second thought. She was haplessly selfish. The new me tries really hard to be truthful, but also careful. And sometimes those lines are blurry and hard to decipher.
So here’s the truth: aside from therapy assignments, and freelance work for Upworthy, I haven’t written anything at all since I don’t even know when. A writer who isn’t writing is either ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
This morning, I received an email from the assistant of a person I admire, like, A LOT, asking what projects I’ve been working on lately.
Because I’m neurotic and very judgmental of myself, I immediately started to panic. What have I been working on? OMG, NOTHING.
I’m 41 years old, still have not queried any agents, and have accomplished exactly zero since the last time we spoke months ago. In fact, as I pondered her email from the floor of my closet, which is where I go to freak out in private, my hands shook as I texted my best friend Audrey.
This perfectly nice assistant is asking me a comp ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
Every year leading up to Halloween, I secretly hope that it will be different this time. That maybe, this year, I’ve done enough work in therapy or been sober long enough to finally make my demons disappear, because I am an optimist.
And every year, despite my best efforts, the darkness creeps in.
The holidays are a huge trigger for me. For the past 20 years, my sadness and anxiety begins around Halloween and slowly ramps up until after New Year’s.
Every. Fucking. Year.
It’s like clockwork, which is something I don’t understand and likely never will.
It starts with the dreams. Then there’s the ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
How can I sum up the events of Election Week in the year of our lord 2020?
Here you go. Click, press play, sound up, enjoy.
View this post on Instagram
#ohhappyday #election2020 #bidenharris #staceyabrams #dumptrump #bluewave #counteveryvote #flipthesenate
A post shared by Pink Face (@pinkfacetv) on Nov 6, 2020 at 12:45pm PST
(If you liked this post, then you should follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
There was a time long ago, before I got sober, when I truly did not care what other people did as long as it didn’t directly affect me. I was self-centered, which is pretty typical for a white, middle-class, stay-at-home mom.
I had blinders on. Purposefully.
After I got sober and started working on myself, things got real uncomfortable, real fast. If you’ve followed me for awhile, you’ve heard me talk about how early sobriety felt like someone ripped off my steel armor and skinned me alive in broad daylight. I felt like a newborn mouse — fragile, hairless, blind, and disoriented.
But I didn’t ..read more
Modern Mommy Madness
3y ago
My friends and I have a working theory that women generally run out of fucks sometime after midlife and that’s why there are so many old women roaming around who simply do not care. I’ve long wondered when I would stop worrying so much.
That time has arrived.
We believe that our fucks ran out ahead of schedule, and the reason why has three main anchoring points.
ANCHORING POINT ONE: The last 4 years.
“What do you mean, Harmony?” Allow me to clarify. THE LAST FOUR YEARS OF LIVING IN TRUMP’S AMERICA.
I have lost respect for so many people. Social media provides a place for literally everyone wit ..read more