One good reason to care what others think of you
What's Within U
by Pam
6M ago
Has anyone ever said to you, “It’s none of your business what other people think of you”? If not, consider yourself blessed. It sounds great in theory, not to give two shits about what other people think, but here’s the truth; we do care and we do make it our business. "When we stop caring what people think we lose our capacity for connection. When we become defined by what people think we lose our capacity to be vulnerable." - Brené Brown We actually walk a fine line between caring to connect and when that caring begins to define us. (Define = controlling what we do and who we are so we fit ..read more
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Pursuing Success Sucks Unless…
What's Within U
by Pam
11M ago
"You're not truly successful unless your success is having a positive impact on the world." - Tyler Perry I'm a massive proponent of awareness. If I've learned anything on my mindset-shifting journey, awareness is the critical component to change. It's also played a significant role in redefining success. In total transparency, the quote that started this post has been on my whiteboard for some time now. It drew me in, and yet I didn't understand why until I realized just how much my definition of success was not my definition at all. TRYING TO BE SUCCESSFUL SUCKED BECAUSE... Growing up, succe ..read more
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Change, It's Too Hard!
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
I’m a big proponent of change, especially if it means something better as a result. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t scare me or unnerve me. Even if it’s a change I initiate. Let’s face it; change is challenging. Change equates to the unknown, and our brains prefer the known and predictable. So, when change is afoot, it throws our brains into a state of “panic.” That’s why we may procrastinate or resist change. “If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.” - Lao Tzu Oh, and did you know that 90% of the approximately 60,000 – 70,000 thoughts we have per day are repeat ..read more
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Create Some Calm With These 17 Super-Easy Mindset Hacks
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
Meet Marla. Marla is having a conversation with a good friend. While sharing, her friend interrupts and redirects the conversation to something else. This royally ticks Marla off. Marla, feeling angry, hangs up the phone, swearing to never share with her friend again. She then replays her friend's behavior. And as she's replaying, she's crafting a narrative of how rude her friend is. How her friend has no time for her. How her friend is selfish and not interested in anyone but herself. Each time she replays the event and the story she's crafted, she gets angrier and angrier. (Side note: This ..read more
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Change, It's Too Hard!
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
I’m a big proponent of change, especially if it means something better as a result. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t scare me or unnerve me. Even if it’s a change I initiate. Let’s face it; change is challenging. Change equates to the unknown, and our brains prefer the known and predictable. So, when change is afoot, it throws our brains into a state of “panic.” That’s why we may procrastinate or resist change. “If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.” - Lao Tzu Oh, and did you know that 95% of the approximately 60,000 – 70,000 thoughts we have per day are repeat ..read more
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Create Some Calm With These 17 Super-Easy Mindset Hacks
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
Meet Marla. Marla is having a conversation with a good friend. While sharing, her friend interrupts and redirects the conversation to something else. This royally ticks Marla off. Marla, feeling angry, hangs up the phone, swearing to never share with her friend again. She then replays her friend's behavior. And as she's replaying, she's crafting a narrative of how rude her friend is. How her friend has no time for her. How her friend is selfish and not interested in anyone but herself. Each time she replays the event and the story she's crafted, she gets angrier and angrier. (Side note: This ..read more
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(TSITM) CHAPTER 2: MADAM PEOPLE-PLEASER; THE NOT GOOD ENOUGH STORY
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
Let me introduce you to Madame People-Pleaser, a timid soul who did and said all the "right things" to fit in and be loved. The story she was great at telling was the one of "not good enough." And that story showed up in various ways throughout my childhood, teenage years, and part of my adulthood. ,"Belonging is being somewhere where you want to be, and they want you. Fitting in is being somewhere where you want to be, but they don't care one way or the other. Belonging is being accepted for you. Fitting in is being accepted for being like everyone else. If I get to be me, I belong. If I have ..read more
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(TSITM): CHAPTER 1: THE V-WORD & WHERE IT ALL BEGAN
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
"What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.” - Haruki Murakami WARNING: We're about to get vulnerable. If you're scared, trust me, I get it. It's often hard to look at the stories we've been telling and decipher what's true and what's false. Honestly, it's taken me quite some time to get to this place and time. Where I'm not only willing to look at my stories but where I'm finally ready to share my truth about them. And so, to begin our journey together, I'd like to share the story behind all my stories. IN THE BEGINNING… If you've ever watched the TV show ,"The Golden Girls ..read more
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The Stories I Told Myself (TSITM): A Series
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
(How to identify and rewrite the stories standing between you and what you want.) The Stories I Told Myself (TSITM) is a series of blog posts that initially started as a book until I realized they'd have far more value and reach offered this way. It's a compilation of the stories that kept me feeling small, not good enough, stifled, and far from being #unstoppable... and how I've ultimately rewritten them. And because I believe in transparency, I want to start this series by saying these posts will be hard to write and share. Not because I'm ashamed of my stories, but because sharing them requ ..read more
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Making Mistakes Doesn't Have To Suck!
What's Within U
by Pam
1y ago
Do you make a mistake and move on? Or do you chew on that mistake until there's no flavor left, using it as a 2 x4 to beat the crap out of yourself? The big mistakes I used to chew on endlessly. Not for days but sometimes for years. I'd swim in the guilt or the anger around those mistakes until my fingers looked like a prune. As I was thinking about this topic, one of my many mistakes popped into view. A BIG KAHUNA MISTAKE Several years ago, I purchased a marketing program even though my gut was screaming at me not to do so. It kept trying to tell me that there was something not right about t ..read more
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