Ah, fight, flight and freeze; the most common and widely known stress responses within the nervous system. Even reptilian species exhibit these behaviours, but is that the full scope of what we do as human beings? In an article by Dr Steven Porges (father of “Polyvagal Theory”) written in 1995, Porges asserts “mammalian, but not reptilian, brain stem organisation is characterised by a ventral vagal complex… related to processes associated with attention, motion, emotion, and communication.” What does that mean? Well, essentially it ..read more

Talking to Children About Coronavirus Many of us are going to work and enduring new procedures and policies surrounding hygiene and social distancing. We are reading about the Coronavirus pandemic on social media, hearing about it on the news, and talking with colleagues and friends (at a distance). A lot is going on right now, and everyone is a little worried, we are experiencing stress and worry, we need to acknowledge that before we can move forward; and what worries us worries our children. So how do we begin talking to children ..read more

Play It Out: Peaceful Parenting Through Play Managing behaviours often plays the lead role in many a parent’s day to day life. Manipulative behaviours, attention-seeking behaviours, aggressive behaviours, withdrawn and reclusive behaviours, uncooperative and defiant behaviours, and a great deal more. However, the problem is not in the behaviour itself, but rather that we live in a society that focusses solely on the behaviour, which leads to industry and cultural focus on “behaviour management.” However, what we must come to realise ..read more

Oh play! I LOVEplay. Play is so powerful, it is the language of babies, toddlers, and children. It is how they communicate, how they process information, how they learn a new skill, how they engage with the world, how they connect with themselves and others, and how they move through something difficult. But what about play before bed? Play is the greatest tool you can have as a parent, to communicate to, and with, your child. As you can see play has many functions. One such function is to do with connecting with self and connectin ..read more

Yep, I don’t give my son chores, teach him manners, or how to share. You probably think that I am a shocking mother who has no interest in raising my son to be a responsible, polite, and considerate. Well, I can’t blame you for thinking that, however you would be wrong. My son is nearing three years old, he is still quite young and has a long way to go in his development. Having researched (a lot) and always attempting to parent in a way that is conscious and deliberate, I decided it would be best to never actively teach my son my anything. You see, babies and toddlers don’t actually need to b ..read more

Empathy is a capacity that human beings are born with. A capacity not unlike communication, learning, and building relationship; and just like these capacities, if the environment does not provide consistent examples of what this looks AND feels like in a healthy way, then it cannot develop effectively. In a world that uses shame, blame, punishment, and manipulation disguised as praise and rewards; true empathy is quickly forgotten, misunderstood, and undervalued. Though we acknowledge as adults the desperate need for someone to “ju ..read more

The Funnel and The Container Carl Jung, a historical psychiatrist and psychoanalyst shared that “The paradox… reflects a higher level of intellect and, by not forcibly representing the unknowable as known, gives a more faithful picture of the real state of affairs.” A very important and somewhat confusing concept, especially if we are considering the world of parenting. So how do we make sense of this idea? Firstly, we must unpack the paradox. What is a paradox? A paradox is two seemingly contradicting state of affairs or beliefs ..read more

The Needs Wheel As a youth worker at nineteen years old, I remember learning about Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs, you are probably familiar with it, pyramid with five distinct sections, starting at the base and building upon each other, are needs that drive people to the elusive point of obtaining self-actualisation. Self-actualisation being the fulfilment of potential, self-acceptance, personal growth, purpose, and creativity; however few are aware that Maslow later amended this pyramid, and the top was no longer self-actualisation b ..read more

Managing the Momo Monsters.   As many of you may have been made aware, a new parenting nightmare has gone viral. Fear spreads so quickly doesn’t it? The Momo challenge. For those who may not be aware the Momo challenge is supposed to be a hidden challenged secretly edited into the middle of children’s videos (said to be contained within videos such as Peppa Pig, Paw Patrol, and the like). Halfway through these videos, an image of a grotesque, bug-eyed, birdlike, womanish creature appears on screen, encouraging your child to engage i ..read more

I remember when I first had my son, I “knew” so much. I had studied, I had worked with families and children, I had done work experience in childcare, and had been around babies and children in my personal life a lot. I believed I was as prepared as they come. Not so true. Was everything I had learned and experienced true, yes. Would it have been helpful YES. But what happened, and I have found this to be true for so many women, is that it was like I forgot. All of a sudden this baby emerged into the world, a baby that was 100% rel ..read more