In a surprising turn of events, Vogue has just released its newest cover featuring the unexpected pairing of Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky and U.S. Representative Mike Johnson. The cover, which features the two men embracing in a warm, loving embrace, has left the world in a state of disbelief and confusion.  The cover, which was shot by renowned photographer Annie Leibovitz, shows President Zelensky and Representative Johnson in a romantic setting, with the two men gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes. The image, which has been described as “stunning,” “breathtaking,” and “ut ..read more

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WASHINGTON, DC—President Barack Obama Joe Biden has once again surprised the world with his unwavering generosity towards Iran. In response to the Islamic Republic’s latest direct assault against Israel, the President has graciously released another $10 billion in funding to the Middle Eastern nation. This move has left many scratching their heads, as it seems that the President’s commitment to “peace” and diplomacy knows no bounds. The latest attack on Israel by Iran has been met with swift and decisive action by the Obama Biden administration. In a statement released to the press, Biden dec ..read more

BAGHDAD—Eyewitnesses have reported that the elusive and mysterious Ghost of Kyiv has entered Iranian airspace, taking on the Iranian air force in an epic aerial battle that has left the world in awe. The Ghost of Kyiv, a legendary fighter pilot who has been credited with shooting down over 40 enemy aircraft, has been the subject of countless rumors and conspiracy theories. But now, it seems that the ghostly aviator has set his sights on Iran, seeking to avenge the fallen heroes of past conflicts. The Ghost of Kyiv’s sudden appearance has left many scratching their heads, as the conflict in Ir ..read more

SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom has issued an ultimatum to the world: sacrifice 1 million babies to climate goddess Greta Thunberg this year, or face the consequences of a blotted-out sun. The governor, who has been advocating for climate action since he took office, has taken his crusade to new heights – or rather, new darkness. Newsom, who has been praised for his ambitious climate goals, has gained a massive following around the globe. His unwavering dedication to the cause has inspired millions of people to take action and fight for a better future. However, his latest demand ..read more

In loving memory of Karine Jean-Pierre, also known as “Wanda’, the dynamic and unforgettable actress who stole our hearts on In Living Color and went on to become the White House Press Secretary under President Joe Biden. Wanda, who first appeared on our screens in 1990, quickly became an icon with her sass, style, and unforgettable catchphrases. Born on a bright, sunny day in the mind of Keenen Ivory Wayans, Wanda went on to captivate audiences with her larger-than-life personality and unique fashion sense. Known for her outrageous outfits and even more outrageous hairstyles, Wanda made a la ..read more

NEW YORK CITY—Former CNN anchor Don Lemon has announced his marriage to notorious terrorist and “biggest threat to America,” Tim Malone. The couple made it Instagram official, sharing a “Just married!” photo on Saturday night, five years to the day after their engagement. In the photo, the two tuxedo-clad grooms are exiting a church, wearing big smiles and holding their three dogs, who wear tux-like, bow-tied collars. The dogs, who were reportedly the ring bearers, were seen wearing tiny top hats and holding miniature briefcases containing the wedding bands. Video shared in Lemon’s and Malone ..read more

BEDMINSTER, NEW JERSEY – In ongoing efforts to bankrupt former President and candidate Donald Trump, deep state operatives set off a small tactical nuke miles below ground in the hope of damaging Trump National Gold course, causing the 4.7 magnitude earthquake felt throughout the northeast. The clandestine operation, believed to be part of a broader campaign to bankrupt and discredit Trump ahead of his 2024 presidential victory, exceeded expectations. Instead of merely damaging the golf course, the detonation triggered a seismic event, causing an earthquake felt across the area. The unexpecte ..read more

WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) has claimed that the recent earthquake that struck New York City was caused by “Jewish Space Lasers,” a statement that has left many scratching their heads in disbelief. “It’s clear that the ongoing protests in Palestine have led to the activation of these Jewish Space Lasers, which in turn caused the earthquake in New York City,” Greene said during a recent press conference, her eyes wide with what some have described as “alarming enthusiasm.” Greene’s claims have been met with a mixture of amusement and concern, as many question th ..read more

In an impassioned speech at a recent press conference, Vice President* Kamala Harris called on the NCAA to finally allow women’s basketball teams to use actual baskets in their games, a privilege that has long been reserved for male athletes.  “It’s 2024, and women are still not allowed to use baskets in their basketball games,” Harris declared, her voice filled with disbelief. “This is a clear example of the systemic sexism that continues to plague our society, and it’s high time the NCAA made some changes.”  Harris’ demands have been met with both support and skepticism, as many q ..read more