How to Talk to Strangers (Listener Question)
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
We spend a lot of time thinking about how to have conversations with people we care about. After all, these are the relationships that have the biggest influence in our lives. But what if we spent as much time thinking about the conversations we have with strangers? Could there be new experiences we’re missing out on that would enrich our lives? Our question this episode: how do you start a conversation with a stranger that might serve as a lead-in to friendship? If you enjoy this episode, please share with friends, family and colleagues! Your reviews, ratings and subscriptions are also appr ..read more
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How are you? as a gateway to connection
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
It’s a reflexive question most of us ask when we start a conversation, and it’s one of the easiest and most challenging questions to answer: how are you? Every time it comes up, I find myself hesitating just a little. This is especially true in the past year, when it feels like an extremely loaded question. Our question this episode: how far do you go when you answer, “how are you?” Hosted by Beth L. Buelow. Full episode transcript is available at howcanisaythis.com. Your reviews, ratings, and shares are welcome! If you have a listener question you’d like to have addressed in a future episod ..read more
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Calming Your Nerves (Listener Question)
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
It happens to all of us, no matter how many times we’ve been in a difficult conversation: we get nervous. We feel stress. That stress can show up in lots of ways: in our body language, breathing patterns, our seeming inability to put words together in a logical order. Even when we figure out what we want to say and how to say it, we can tie ourselves up in nervous knots. Our question this episode: how can you work through stress so that you can effectively engage in a difficult conversation? This episode features my response to a question submitted by a listener. If you have a question you’d ..read more
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Acknowledging the Good in the Bad
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
How can I say this? When you have a day like January 6, 2021 in the United States, it’s hard to know what to say. It left many of us speechless, then enraged, mortified, and confused. When societal norms are violated in such a violent manner, words often escape us. And then we become unable to see the people we feel have violated us as our fellow human beings. We also can refuse to acknowledge those who do the right thing after long doing what we’ve felt is the wrong thing. Our question this episode: how can we keep our hearts and minds open when we feel cynical about another person’s sinceri ..read more
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The Art of Letting Go
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
While every year has its ups and downs, 2020 will go down as an especially interesting year for lots of reasons. Our everyday vocabulary expanded to include words previously only used by doctors, lawyers, and politicians. And the conversations we’ve had with friends, family, and colleagues have challenged our understanding of what we thought was true. Sometimes, the new understanding leads to a re-evaluation of the relationship, or even a decision to call it quits. Our question this episode: how do we know when it’s time to let go of a relationship? Read a transcript of this episode at howca ..read more
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How to have meaningful virtual conversations with Jennifer Britton
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
For those of us that grew up with a rotary telephone glued to the wall and no answering machine, the idea of being connected 24/7 everywhere we go still has a bit of novelty to it. I still sometimes marvel that while I walk my dog or go on errands, I’m basically carrying the world in my pocket. That convenience can lead to complacency, which can compromise our approach to conversations that happen over and through advanced technology. Our question this episode: how can we make sure technology doesn’t interview with real connection? My guest is Jennifer Britton. Jennifer is passionate about w ..read more
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Talking about Race at Work with Kwame Christian
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
Awkward, emotional, uncomfortable. This is how many of us feel when we try to talk about race. But we need to know how to have these conversations if we’re going to make progress toward a more equitable and high-functioning society. Negotiation expert Kwame Christian joins me to give us some starting points on how to talk about race, particularly in a work environment. This episode is also available on YouTube! Listen AND watch the conversation here: https://youtu.be/1ewGfsSCpVA Kwame Christian: http://americannegotiationinstitute.com Podcast: http://howcanisaythis.com Beth Buelow: http://be ..read more
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Using Reflective Inquiry for Better Conversations with Marcia Reynolds
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
A coaching client recently reminded me of a truth that’s easy to forget: if you want to have a great conversation with someone, focus on trying to be interested, rather than interesting. And how do we demonstrate interest? We ask questions. But there’s more to it than that, and not all questions are created equal. Our question this episode: how can we use curiosity to make more meaningful connections with others?  My guest is Marcia Reynolds, PhD, MCC. Her newest book is "Coach the Person, Not the Problem: A Guide to Using Reflective Inquiry." Your can learn more on the episode webpage a ..read more
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Couples Communication in Quarantine with Marianne van Dijk
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
As life in the pandemic continues, our capacity for empathy and connection can come and go. Sometimes it’s easy to be present for our loved ones, and other times, we need space and just to be left alone. Asking for what we need and having boundaries can be challenging enough during non-stressful times, but add a pandemic and all that comes with it into the mix? Things get more complicated. Our question this episode: how can we take care of ourselves and our relationships during a time of uncertainty and stress? My guest is relationship communication expert Marianne van Dijk. We talk about ho ..read more
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Creating a Communication-Friendly Space with Rebecca West
How Can I Say This...
by Beth Buelow
3y ago
We all know that our physical surroundings influence our mood and ability to focus. But do we fully appreciate how much they affect our communication? How a room is arranged, what’s in the space, and how welcoming it is all contribute – or detract – from being able to have productive conversations. Our question this episode: what does our physical space have to do with our capacity for connection? My special guest is Rebecca West, founder of Seriously Happy Homes. Thanks for listening! Your reviews, ratings, and shares are greatly appreciated. You can learn more at www.howcanisaythis.com. S ..read more
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