I talk about fear a lot. Why? Because fear ruled my life for years. Fear is masked by many names, ‘insecurity’, ‘worry’, ‘regret’, or the more commonly used name ‘anxiety’. They’re all derivatives of fear. In simple terms, a semi is still a semi, despite the name of the company that is written on the side of the trailer. Fear is fear, despite what other names are being used to describe it. When I was living an insecure life, I was completely afraid of what others thought of me. I lived with a highly unsettled state of mind because I was fearful over how people perceived me. I wanted to always ..read more

If you have stumbled across this blog, it is because you are in search of answers. Be it your first attempt in finding answers, or be it your one millionth attempt, whichever the case I am very glad you’re here. You are NOT ALONE with what you are going through. You see, I am married to a USMC Veteran who has suffered through Post Traumatic Stress Disorder since he came home from his final tour in Afghanistan, in 2011. I am here to tell you that there is a cure, and there is true freedom from PTSD. If this is what you are searching for, please continue reading..... *Now, contrary to popular be ..read more

So many of us walk around physically zonked, as we desperately grasp onto the hope of “I am getting to bed early so I can get some good sleep tonight”, we find ourselves stumbling through the day, putting whatever is available into our systems, to ensure our bodies stay ‘awake’ and ‘functioning’ in some sort of respectable fashion. A tired brain can bring about some of the most interesting thoughts, can’t it? What makes them interesting is you can’t properly discern if they’re a valid contemplation or simply exhausted emotions. It's an exciting gamble! The other day, during one of my daily ‘mi ..read more

The definition of trust: a : b : one in which confidence is placed Trust. That precious thing we all want, yet the one thing most of us are quite reluctant to give, and in the blink of an eye...... it can disappear. What is it that makes trust so…...... elusive? As babies we come out of the womb blindly trusting everyone, as we don’t have much of a choice if we want to survive. As we grow, however, we begin to learn who can and can’t be trusted through inevitable, painful life experiences. The decline of trust starts at a fairly young age, really. As a school-age children, we deal with the bul ..read more

The brain is so incredibly convoluted. I mean, how’s this for a conundrum? The smartest scientists and doctors on this planet are not yet able to fully understand the complexity of the human brain. Though the knowledge of the brain has improved over the last 15 years, there is still a vast amount of untapped information left, and personally I don’t believe we will ever fully understand how this ball of fatty tissue functions. However, none of these truths keep my tireless cranium from trying to dissect itself and crack open life’s secrets, as soon as I attempt to lay down and sleep. It is pure ..read more

It’s 2019, folks. A time where the truth is “hurtful” and even highly “offensive”. A time where kind words are taboo like saying “yes ma’am” apparently means you’re calling that person old, and “thank you” is rarely said!! A time where holding the door for someone doesn’t tend to happen. A time where we are told to “protect ourselves” by finding a “safe place”, or on the other hand, protect ourselves by starting riots and causing chaos. However, it is also a time where the concept of cleansing one’s life of all unhealthy relationships is highly encouraged and talked about. If a relationship is ..read more

I struggle with what’s not so commonly referred to as ‘Self-harming Klutz Syndrome’. What this means is that on any given day, I’ll be doing something like- washing the dishes- for example, and chaos will erupt, seemingly out of nowhere. See, I’ll be standing there at the sink as scorching hot water is poured into a pan that is coated with stuck food, and my brain will naturally tell my body, “Keep your hands out of the hot water, it’ll burn you”, The problem is, almost as soon as that thought is completed my “oh so defiant” subconscious, (I’m not sure if it’s really my subconscious doing this ..read more

“If I wasn’t afraid, I would..... get out more.” If I wasn’t afraid, I would..... pursue my dreams.” “If I wasn’t afraid, I would…. *insert your fear here*.” Does this sound like you? Does fear hold you back? What would you do, if you weren’t afraid? Have you ever really thought about that question? Think about it now, with me. Is being afraid of something holding you back from experiencing all that life has to offer? The simple answer is, yes, it is highly likely. So now ask yourself this, has it been worth it to avoid the things that are scaring you? Are you achieving your goals, are you liv ..read more

Three years ago, today, everything in my life came crashing down. My husband’s PTSD and alcohol abuse had hit the lowest point it would ever go, and I felt completely done with all of it. I had attempted to go to work, but couldn’t stay, so I quickly ran to a gas station to buy a pack of cigarettes, then drove out to the one place I knew I could be totally alone, Palisades State Park. Once there, I was going to try and sort things out, as I filled my lunges with some delicious smoke. Per the usual during confusing times, I would self-destruct. I needed to feel in control. I needed to do someth ..read more

The majority of the human race have all been through shit storms and life struggles. Be it a big storm or little storm, they all feel the same. Crippling. Suffocating. Terrifying. You read all over the place about how ‘attitude is everything’ when it comes to tackling life’s nasty moments. I know when I see those memes, I read them, think to myself “yeah, that’s totally right”, and then continue on dealing with my hard times, and totally forget to adjust my attitude. It is SO EASY to blame everyone, and everything, around you, when you feel like an emotional ball of crap. Should we really blam ..read more