‘And Just Like That’: This Widow Found it Real
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
And Just Like That, the Sex and the City reboot has become extremely controversial. Two episodes in and everyone is commenting on, or arguing about, everything we can think of. From the women’s looks (not ok), to Peloton bikes, to Steve’s hearing loss, every detail seems to be under scrutiny. The one subject that hits very close to home for me is Big’s heart attack. And Just Like That…Ten Years Ago, My Husband Had a Heart Attack in our Home and Died Just like Big. So I do have some feelings on the subject. There has been a ton of criticism on how Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker)  re ..read more
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31 Thoughts From A Solo Parent (There Are Millions More)
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
There are millions of thoughts that go through the head of a parent after losing a spouse.  They do change over time and as our kids grow. These are just 30 of my thoughts from a solo parent. How the hell am I going to do this??? If my husband were here, we would figure this out together.. I have no one to help me make a decision. I am going to completely screw up my kids by myself. This is exhausting. I just made a major decision on my own. Was it the right one? Wow, that was a really good call. Ugh that was totally the wrong way to go. My child is having major issues. How can I handle ..read more
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Ten Years – Long Days, Short Years
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
The days are long but the years are short. We have all heard that saying before, but for a widowed mom it takes on a whole new meaning. Ten years ago tomorrow my husband died. Suddenly. Without warning. Sometimes, when I close my eyes, it feels as if that day was yesterday. Other times, a million years ago. The days were long. Very long. When I think back on those days in the early years, I remember feeling as if I was walking through quicksand. Every night when I got into bed, I was amazed that I had made it through yet another 24 hours. Plus, getting into bed did not equal sleep. I barely ev ..read more
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I Had An Abortion
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Ashley Faith
1y ago
I had an abortion on June 10th, 2021. This is not a story I ever intended to share, but given the circumstances in Texas, I feel it’s important. My husband and I tried conceiving for over a year and a half. We went through multiple rounds of failed fertility treatments. We finally found out I was pregnant in February of this year, due on October 27th. We were elated, we couldn’t believe it. From as far back as I could remember, all I wanted was to be a mom, and now I was finally getting that chance. You’re “not supposed to” share your pregnancy until after 12 weeks, after all of the initial te ..read more
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I Don’t Like To Think About What If…
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
What would life be like if Daddy didn’t die? My daughter asked me this a short time ago. My response was that I don’t like to think about that. Because I don’t. She came back to me recently and told me she discussed this with her therapist and he believes I should answer that question because it is important to her. So I took a deep breath and I tried. If Daddy didn’t die…. Well, we would still be married (I would hope) You would still be gay (of course) You may have started off in the city at a fashion school instead of your horrible first college experience and then transferring (I like to ..read more
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Old Friends And New Friends
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
I recently saw a story on how when you become a mom, you make new friends and lose the old ones. Somehow, I am lucky enough to have both old and new friends. My group of mom friends came together when my oldest daughter was just nine months old. I took a baby class and poof! I met my people. From that moment on, we were a tight group.  During those early years of marriage and babies, I did lose touch with my old friends. We married different people at different times, and moved to various towns and states. Life happens and friends fall away, even when it is unintentional. Some years ago ..read more
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I Am Not Rushing Into Fall
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
“I just drove through Dunkin’ and they have pumpkin coffee already.” Ugh. I just got this text from a friend. It is August. Why are we rushing into fall? I have always hated that transition from summer into the cooler months. Ever since I was a kid, that feeling of school creeping up on me and stealing me away from the beach or camp has been the worst. Who wants to leave fun in the sun to sit in a dark and dingy classroom?  Some people love the fall, my daughter being one of them. The cool crisp air, sweaters and boots have always signified her favorite time of year. I believe this may st ..read more
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Jealous of Our Kids?
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
1y ago
Taylor Dane – remember her? Not Taylor Swift – Taylor Dane. Today, 90’s on 9 played her ballad, Love Will Lead You Back. Suddenly it was 1990 and I was 24 years old, pining for some guy I met on Fire Island. My best friend Wendy recently told me that she is “jealous” of our kids. We have four daughters between us – ages 20, 21, 22, and 23. They girls grew up together and are very close. Why would she be jealous of our kids? Because they are 20, 21, 22 and 23 of course. Their adult lives are beginning. The younger two are in their last year or so of college and the older two are just beginning ..read more
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Reading in Quarantine
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
2y ago
So what did I do during the quarantine? I ate I drank I slept I binge-watched I zoomed I cleaned I did puzzles I drank some more And… I read books Reading in quarantine helped get me through it. I believe a love of books is something you are born with. It has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. I picked up “Are You There God…It’s Me Margaret?” and I didn’t put it down until I devoured every last page. I then read every Judy Blume book I could get my hands on, “Deenie” being my absolute favorite. My mom began taking me to the library, where I would check out a pile of books every t ..read more
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28 First Times For Widows
Living the Second Act | Life Changes...So Do We
by Stacy Feintuch
2y ago
The “first times” of being a widow.  The horrible, the wonderful, and everything in between. These were some of my firsts… The first time you go to sleep in an empty bed The first time you wake up in the morning alone The first day you go back to work The first day your kids go back to school The first time you are invited to an event alone The first time you decline an invitation The first time you attend an event alone The first time you take off your wedding ring The first time you have no one to dance with The first time you take a vacation alone or alone with kids The first time you ..read more
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