Bonus Mom Necklace
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
10M ago
Sterling Silver Bonus Mom Necklace with 24 inch chain $99.95 Order: To order contact jann@bonusfamilies.com ..read more
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Badmouthing Puts Your Kids Right in the Middle
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
11M ago
Q. My ex was always verbally abusive. He would call me terrible names and never cared if the kids were around. Now that we have broken up he’s upped the ante. The kids are coming home with terrible stories and I’m confident he’s saying terrible things about me to the kids. What’s good ex-etiquette? A. Good ex-etiquette rule #3, “Don’t badmouth,” reminds co-parents not to talk badly about their children’s other parent at any time, but especially within earshot of the children. Children have dual allegiances—they know they are half mom and half dad. When they hear the negativity, they will perso ..read more
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Should I send a Valentine to my ex?
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
1y ago
Q. Valentine’s Day is always a confusing day for me and this Valentine’s Day was no different. I get along quite well with my ex and Valentine’s Day was our anniversary. I want to reach out just to reinforce the journey we went through—married, awful divorce, and now doing our best to co-parent. We rode the wave and I’m proud of us, but he has remarried, and I think his wife is a little intimidated by how easily we interact. It’s not my goal to upset their life, just acknowledge “us” on this day. But, is that good ex-etiquette? A. Hmm. Very red flags—not just light red, but flashing red, which ..read more
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Applying the 10 Rules
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
1y ago
Q. Help! My bonus son is getting married next week and I need some advice on how to cope with my husband’s ex who has been nothing but a trouble maker since day one. Seems like the older their kids get, the more his ex tries to turn them against their father and me. She caused a huge problem for us that kept us from having anything to do with two of his children for a year and a half. Now we are suppose to go to this wedding and act like nothing has happened. I know that the ex and her oldest daughter (it’s the youngest daughter’s wedding) will try to cause some kind of problem at the wedding ..read more
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Applying the 10 Rules
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
1y ago
Q. Help! My bonus son is getting married next week and I need some advice on how to cope with my husband’s ex who has been nothing but a trouble maker since day one. Seems like the older the kids get, the more his ex tries to turn them against their father and me. She caused a huge problem for us that kept us from having anything to do with two of his children for a year and a half. Now we are suppose to go to this wedding and act like nothing has happened. I know that the ex and her daughter will try to cause some kind of problem at the wedding. They want everyone to believe that my husb ..read more
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Christmas Gift Sabotage
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
1y ago
Q. My husband’s ex asked me what we bought their son for Christmas. Because he and his Dad love soccer, I told her we bought him a jersey and tickets to a game when their team comes into town. She has remarried and celebrates Hanukkah with her new husband and wanted her son to participate in the first night. We thought that was great. Well, she bought him the exact jersey we bought him. I think she did it on purpose! My husband doesn’t think so. I’m furious. What’s good ex-etiquette? A. I’ve worked with quite a few new partners, particularly women (this is my experience, I’m not aware of a stu ..read more
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Good Ex-etiquette Contract for Co-parents
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
1y ago
       Date:    This contract is between ____________________________________   and   ____________________________________ We acknowledge that we are both good people who are simply unable to live together. We believe that all children have the right to have both parents in their lives and we agree to do everything in our power to support that end. We pledge to negotiate in good faith referring to the Ten Rules of Good Ex-etiquette as a guide to remind us to use the best interest of our children as the basis for our decisions. Th ..read more
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I Want my Wife Arrested for Cheating!!!!
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
2y ago
Q. I caught my wife cheating. Is it against the law? I want to sue someone or arrest someone! Seems like something that hurts so many people should be against the law! My kids are really messed up and I don’t know what to do. What’s good ex-etiquette? A. As I’ve said before, good ex-etiquette is good behavior after divorce or separation. Unfortunately, this sounds like bad behavior before divorce or separation—so technically, the good ex-etiquette component applies to how you handle yourself after the break-up. Threatening law suits and arrests may be a little over the top, although most in yo ..read more
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Ex Blames Dad for Alienating the Children
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
2y ago
Q. When it became obvious my wife was having an affair and was going to dissolve our family, I pleaded with her to stay until at least our boys were off to college (four years away). She decided against it, left, and now our boys are hurt, angry, and confused. I’ve gone to great lengths to try to protect my wife from their angst, but I cannot control their feelings. She blames me for their occasional harsh words toward her, has accused me of “poisoning” them against her, and has shared that with her family. Now I’m hated for something I haven’t done. I refuse to speak poorly to the boys no mat ..read more
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Why Can’t I Have 50/50 Custody?
Bonus Families | Co-parenting Advice For Divorced Parents And Stepfamilies
by Jann
2y ago
Q. All I want is to be part of my daughter’s life, 50/50, but every time we go to court they just ask her stepmom, who is her attorney, and my ex-spouse, and both say no, so nothing different happens. What’s good ex-etiquette? A. As clarification for my readers who may not be familiar with the terminology, 50/50, refers to equal custody of your child after a break-up. However, there are two components to equal custody. One, equal time with your child, or physical custody. Two, the right to legally make a decision for your child, or joint legal custody. Operating from the premise that a child d ..read more
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