From the beginning I was struck by the apparently perfect contrast between Phuket and Edinburgh, my home town. Never was the analogy of the yin and yang more culturally applicable… the bad within the good, and good found within bad. There, the vibrant culture and visceral environment populated by seemingly untrustworthy individuals – as an aside, violent crime in Thailand is extremely low. Comparative to places in Europe and South America, I found the streets to be remarkably safe even at night. And here, the damp concrete and architecture populated by a vibrant and multi-ethnic mix of generou ..read more

Across the span of many victories and occasional stinging defeat, a crystallisation of emotion occurred, morphing into contented sense of wellbeing, from a curiosity which has lead to a depth of experience. During these times of struggle and joy, sorrow and laughter and awe, a sense of purpose evolved. I have foregone many things in the search for internal repose, a hedonistic life can lead to imbalance. Though confronted by chaos, the tropics affirmed my freedom and the right to exist, removed in some small way from the materialism of the west. Seven years washed over in a heartbeat. People e ..read more

To walk on quiet moonlit night, a starlight sea-washed beach, with clouds whose silver tops are lit, and shadows beneath one’s feet, and watch as silver crests roll in, move silently above – these moments in which a man may find his railing sense of shock, at grandeur found in life, a warrior sat alone at night upon a glistening rock. To be at peace or finding free the kindly solitude, the silver air a frame, a part of our shared vision, the answer is the same. To hear the echoed waves return from silent line of trees, to bathe in supernatural light for years until set free. And next to it ora ..read more

In an attempt to avoid the flow of negativity through my words I have silenced awhile my narratives on this life. Recently whilst recovering from brain damage sustained in pursuit of purpose and movement, violent inclination, I have reached conclusions the resultant objectivity of which are apparent. Restlessness for learning and fulfillment continues, new ideals appear towards which I strive. Learn the risks and the rewards lie self-evident therein. Be resilient enough to grow, though the path may be long and unlit, in the face of the damaging impulses of others, your own mistakes, failures o ..read more

Scribbling furtively has always been an enjoyable, cathartic hobby, though my previous employer has always tried to seek ways to denigrate that; consciously, for the most part, but I shall not be silent. Money is very often a method for the old to control the free; for money, much like Time, is a transient resource. It comes and goes, flowing through us, evaporating in every instant – and she is nearing the end of hers as a bitter parasite, leeching the life blood away from those living for the love. “Motherfucker this ain’t back in the day – but you don’t hear me though!” Learn to reserve you ..read more

Undulating landscape, inclining mountain range, from the tower on the edge of town the boy sat, and looked out – a shepherd for this day. Arrived from Tebourba, and by the road stood Iser, round eyed in shock – though the sun was bright to his front. That the boy had ridden from Tunis to find them there, amidst those arid plains, alone he had come to this place named Malaha – and there he would stay. Better to be alone and free in this world, than to live trapped behind city walls. The courtyard lay swept and jasmine blossomed there, its sweet fragrance a portal forever. Inside shady rooms res ..read more

Much longer there are doubts I shall remain to this plane, for I have grown tired of constant struggle. Emptiness prevails, such that only violence curtails. What I have seen in life has filled me with much joy, but now I look upon it with eyes devoid of such care as once my youth did bear. I was forsaken by love, and rightly so, the month my brother died. His death in vain, unnecessary, within it the pain of unhappy endings. She has since moved on to blossom and grow, yet I have been left as once I always was. Incomplete, what has gone and what might come separate from one another diminishing ..read more

Remind me of what I am and who I have been, remind me of coasts of gold and amazement, remind me of pain and of fear. Remind me of love found in the eyes of another. All of life is change, and through the fires of misfortune and mistake and failure are we forged anew. The meaning of life is whatever we make it – but violence chose me. Capable of what though? Capable of sharing the greatest times of my life with you? Of finding love where only there had been loneliness and alienation? Capable of discovering so much joy, capable of achieving beyond dreams despite pain? Adversity and sacrifice ca ..read more

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