Just this past weekend I had the pleasure of speaking to a group of women at Harman Baptist Church in Grundy, Virginia about spiritual disciplines and, in particular, prayer. We called this women’s conference, “Fill My Cup,” knowing the Lord would give us hope as we lift our cup to Him! The theme verse for the event was … May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. Romans 15:13 I shared personal stories and illustrations that drove home some of what I’ve learned over the many years in my faith walk whil ..read more

I remember when the new relationship buzzword, “codependency,” emerged in the 1980’s. Yeah, I’m that old. To be clear, psychologists have been identifying these unhealthy relationship patterns between the addict or alcoholic and their family members as far back as the 1930’s. It’s just that in the 80’s, the term took on a broader meaning to include, in short, anyone who forms an excessive and unhealthy dependency on another person.  Funny how scientists come up with a “new” discovery or theory, when it is simply a rebranding of a very old concept or problem.  What’s the old pro ..read more

I’d like to Welcome Kelly Balarie to Worthy Bible Studies today! She’s a gifted author and speaker and I know you will be encouraged by her message of hope and healing today! I could hear the laughs of the other girls about 10 feet away from me. They were having fun. I was alone. They were jumping up and down over the rope. I was sitting on the curb of the playground tarmac. They knew they were loved. I felt unlovable and unworthy. Looking back at myself, sitting on that curb, I wish I could have told young-Kelly: “Kelly, get up and go over there. They probably don’t dislike you as much as y ..read more

When we process through a problem or confusing decision with prayer, we do so to find answers. To find relief, right? But, like the Apostle Paul, God expects us to come at these prayer times with an open hand. With hands that are not so much waiting for a handout as much as being lifted high in praise.  Sure, God wants us to come to Him with our needs—even expecting Him to answer. But, more than that, He expects us to surrender our concerns at His feet.  When we do, we receive inner peace but not always outward resolution.  Let’s learn from two situations in the life of Paul fo ..read more

Over the past two weeks, my husband and I traveled to see several family members in Tennessee and North Carolina. My husband’s parents live in a cabin my father-in-law built at the foothills of the Smoky Mountains in Dandridge, Tennessee. A very scenic spot to enjoy some R&R. We also visited with our youngest son who lives in Bryson City, North Carolina. And then headed out to see our oldest son, his wife (DIL), and their two sons (our grandsons) who live in Wake Forest, North Carolina. It was time to celebrate our grandson’s birthdays (3 yo, 1 yo) since their birthdays are only about two ..read more

Knowing how to rely on God can be a rather elusive issue, not to mention being hard to know how to do. So, as promised today, I will continue to unpack in my “Surrender Series” the final step in the Heart Healing Prayer method, “RELY.”   As in Rely on God! One of the best ways to clear up this mystery is to examine some of David’s Psalms for answers. After all, the psalmist’s way of praying was the inspiration for my HHP prayer processing method.  17 Ways You Can Rely on God . . . Let’s first take a peek at a couple of examples from Psalm 57 to see how David relied on God in times o ..read more

Sometimes we bristle at a task because it’s “unfair,” especially when it comes to our marriages.  Oh sure, most of us accept this reality in the realm of parenting or even in our jobs. But when it comes to marriage, we’ve somehow bought the lie that there should never be anything “unfair” about it.  I don’t know about you but that does not align with God’s word nor the reality of two sinners living together. Not only that, but marriage is God’s picture to the world of His love for the church, His bride.  Because of that monumental purpose, the evil one LOVES to attack our marri ..read more

Christmas time can be a time to make and remember sweet memories even as it also triggers grief because of those very memories or lost opportunities.  Typically, this is because of the loss of loved ones either because they died near Christmas long ago or because it’s one of your first Christmases without them. Sometimes […] The post How to Deal with Unwanted and Lingering ‘Grief’ this Christmas appeared first on Messy Marriage ..read more

Months ago, I introduced you to my Heart Healing Prayer method that allows you to prayer journal and process through a struggle in your life.  It’s one of the most effective and transformative ways I know, as a biblical counselor and prayer warrior, to respond to a problem in life or marriage.  Happen to have […] The post How to Make a Change for the Better that Lasts appeared first on Messy Marriage ..read more

Today I want to tackle the challenge of committing to God’s “yes” when it means heading into scary territory.  But I want to look at this through the lens of marriage while using the example of Abraham’s faith as our backdrop and guide.  Most of us face challenges and conflicts in our marriages (not to […] The post How to Trust When God Calls You to Go into the Unknown appeared first on Messy Marriage ..read more