In a surprising turn of events following the 2024 Academy Awards, the CIA reportedly evacuated legendary actor Al Pacino to a remote island in the South Pacific by helicopter following Pacino’s mysterious on-air utterance of the words “Maria The Oppenheimer” during his presentation of the Award for Best Picture. The message, which is believed to be part of a covert communication intended for a sleeper agent or operative, was read abruptly by Pacino shortly after walking on stage. “The helicopter touched down over there,” said a member of the waitstaff at the after-party at the Beverly Hills Hi ..read more

In a time-saving move that freed up a substantial portion of his day, journalist David Bleicher of the Daily Cutoff digital news magazine was able to successfully re-post a news story on Former-President Donald Trump’s election campaign from four years ago without any changes or updates. Bleicher expressed relief at not having to craft a new article, since he was responsible for finding a vacation rental in the Hamptons for a family re-union this summer and hadn’t made much progress. “Knowing that Trump’s messaging remains virtually unchanged from four years ago, there was a strong likelihood ..read more

While scrubbing thru the latest images on a public discord server, local man Steve Grinscheld became concerned on Wednesday after seeing images of a woman who looked exactly like his Midjourney girlfriend appearing in various romantic scenes, sometimes with other men. “I find it hard to believe that this is not my girlfriend – it looks exactly like her,” he said, referring to the AI-created images he receives by typing variations in the prompt for “asian cute 27 likes books with light in her eyes”. While Grinscheld said he did not have a problem if other guys want to look at her, “it would be ..read more

Marketing Manager Kevin Milzigren of local skin care products company Skintastics, was blissfully unaware Friday as he aimlessly scrolled thru vacation options in Mexico that he had inadvertently authorized an AI algorithm to spend $1 million per minute for his company’s new ad campaign on Pinterest. The campaign, for the company’s new lip moisturizer “Balm Bud”, was authorized on the company’s Pinterest account by Milzigren a few hours earlier after he mistakenly added several extra zeros and authorized his AI software to increase budget as needed for the broadest reach possible. Inundated by ..read more

HOLLYWOOD – In a bid to recapture the popularity of baby Yoda from the prequel series “The Mandalorian,” Disney+ announced Tuesday it is moving into production of a 14-episode series centered around the origin story of baby Greedo from the beloved Star Wars universe. “Based on the high metrics of fan interest in baby Yoda, we wanted to give the Star Wars audience this gripping exploration into Greedo’s upbringing, motivations, and the events that shaped him into the character fans know and love today”, said Marisha Duvernay, EVP of Disney+ SciFi Properties. Filming for the series, which is set ..read more

makeamericathebest.com Your Trusted Source for Faux News. The post Alabama Supreme Court Rules Klondike Bars Can Legally Carry Firearms appeared first on Make America The Best - America's Trusted Source for Faux News ..read more

LAS VEGAS – The San Francisco 49ers encountered an unexpected setback on their journey home Monday after being completely taken aback by the series of rules and security requirements to board their plane at the Las Vegas international airport. Arriving for their flight ten minutes before the scheduled departure, they were surprised to encounter a series of ropes and personnel directing them to a screening area where a long line of people were waiting to have their luggage examined. “I had no idea that this was a thing,” said Equipment Manager Marvin Stronk. “Everyone knew the flight time and w ..read more

LAS VEGAS – Disappointed that his San Francisco 49ers were unable to beat the Kansas City Chiefs in the Super Bowl, Brock Purdy faced some difficult questions Sunday after the game about his lack of endorsement deals with a major insurance company. With rumors circulating about the surprising omission, analysts suggested several potential factors at play. “It could be a problem with his agent just not valuing an appearance in a major national TV commercial the way you or I would,” said NFL board member Sean McFershon. “Or perhaps he hasn’t found the right alignment between his own personal val ..read more

In a surprising turn of events, officials of the National Football League Friday made the unprecedented decision to reschedule the Super Bowl to accommodate pop sensation Taylor Swift’s busy schedule. With fans eagerly awaiting her performance in Japan, the NFL swiftly took action to ensure that the global superstar would have plenty of time to fly back to Las Vegas in time for the opening kickoff. “Obviously, we would have preferred to keep the originally scheduled date for the game,” said Asher Johnson, VP of Operations for the league. “But it seemed to be cutting it too close with her conce ..read more

JUPITER, FL – Addressing controversy surrounding his time as president of the United States, former President Donald Trump asserted in court on Thursday that he could not be considered an officer in the government during that period, since he was never in the office. “I would go in once and awhile to check the mail,” said the former leader of the free world, “but really I don’t remember being in the office much. My secretary would just turn people away all day telling them I was in a high level meeting.” Pleased with the improvement in his golf score over that time period, the ex-President was ..read more