Living in or around #RanchoCucamonga is wonderful, there’s so much to see and do in Rancho Cucamonga and the surrounding areas. There is also fantastic shopping and some of the best business in Rancho Cucamonga. But what happens when you and your spouse can’t enjoy all of what the city has to offer because you keep getting into the same ruts in your marriage? When you know it’s time to see a marriage counselor, you probably begin by googling Marriage Counseling in Rancho Cucamonga, and you will find some amazing marriage counselors in Rancho Cucamonga! But the next step isn’t always so clear ..read more

When that rage burns through your body like a dragon breathing fire because you feel like your partner is just never going to get it, do you feel like just burning it all down?  Do you want to throw in the towel and wave your white flag?  Do you feel like locking the front door and just walking away completely?  I feel your pain.  I know it feels like things will never get better.  I know these cycles can make you become paralyzed and withdrawn and it makes it hard to focus on your work and your kids.  That feeling is terrible - feeling so stuck and not kno ..read more

“Five minutes to freedom.”  “15 minutes a day to make six figures.” “Change your entire life with this hack”  I don't know about you but my IG feed is FULL of clickbait titles like this. My email inbox is also full of headlines like this.  Social media and marketing are made to grab our attention and pull on our heart strings. People want to sell us on the notion that we aren't good enough without whatever they have to sell us.  The therapy space is a little different. I’m not a coach. I’ll never claim to be a guru, and I’ll never splash photos of me and my husband ac ..read more

Finding a marriage counselor in any city is hard! Living in Rancho Cucamonga you are thankfully in a nicely populated area that gives you a few choices when it comes to marriage counseling. So let’s say you’ve done the legwork - searched google, yelp, and maybe asked around to a couple of friends and you’ve gotten a list of marriage counselors that seem nice enough. They will likely offer a free phone consultation, but what should you say and ask when you get on the phone?  Questions to ask a marriage counselor in Rancho Cucamonga I know how hard it is to find a great therapist! You migh ..read more

How long have you spent struggling in your relationship? How many nights have you spent crying alone in the dark, while your partner sleeps next to you, wondering when or how things will ever get better? How many times have you had the same argument and gotten the same results - retreating to your corner, alone, hurt, broken, and feeling helpless?    My guess is way too many.    But why do we suffer alone, in silence?    I’ve heard a lot of interesting opinions about why people choose not to share what’s going on in their marriage. Things like, “we agreed we’d ne ..read more

I’ve heard a lot of strange reasons that couples don’t start the process of couples therapy. Seeing couples day in and day out often makes me forget about some of the myths that exist. The couples I see are usually so ready to dig in and improve their relationships that sometimes I forget that people actually do believe some interesting things.  One of the questions that I always ask couples is whether or not they have been in therapy before. I like to know what worked and what didn't work with their previous therapy so that I can make sure they get what they are looking for during our ..read more

Do you ever get a pit in your stomach when you think about going to work? Or meeting with your boss or a potential client?    Your palms might get sweaty, your throat might feel dry, you might feel nauseous or get that sinking or butterfly feeling in your stomach.   Over the last couple of months these are some of the anxiety symptoms I’ve helped clients clear with Brainspotting. Most of these difficult symptoms cleared after just one session.   One. Session.   Think about that…      Have you ever had trouble sleeping the night before a big meeting?&nbs ..read more

After weeks of putting it off, I finally did it. I went into my backyard and I pulled out the jungle of weeds that had taken over.  The weeds had been growing for months and months, and here in California, we had an exceptionally wet winter. I watched every day as the weeds grew taller and taller. But I was waiting for the perfect time to finally go out and clear the yard.  As I watched and waited, the taller they grew, the more overwhelming the job seemed.  With a gathering of friends at my home looming, and a stretch of sunny days in the forecast, I finally made the time to ..read more

In the last 10 years in my work as a therapist I’ve heard couples argue about some of the most serious issues. I’ve also heard an equal amount of arguments over the most ridiculous things. The most common, yet benign argument, is over housework.  John Gottman says that 69% of marital problems are perpetual issues that will never be solved. This means that you really need to figure out a way to keep the peace and ride the waves of the perpetual problems. When couples come to my office and I bare witness to their arguments over minute things like housework it can be incredibly telling abou ..read more

Buy Christmas gifts. Decorate the Christmas tree. Grocery Shopping. Gingerbread house. Cookie baking. Company Christmas Party… and the list goes on. But is sex on the list? Do you have that scheduled this week?  Most people don’t. It’s not considered sexy by many. However neither is the frustration that comes with a sexless marriage. It may seem like the spontaneity becomes lost in the relationship once you begin scheduling sex, but here are 5 reasons you should be scheduling sex this season:  1.It gives you something to look forward to. Studies show that the anticipation and plann ..read more