What topics do you like to discuss? I will talk about anything under the sun. However, when it comes to “discussions,” my tastes have changed over the years. In my twenties, I enjoyed animated political discussions more than anything. Now, in my mid 40’s, I have mellowed out and I could honestly do without them for the rest of my life. I like to have conversations about films and music and all kinds of art. History and literature are also interesting to me. I enjoy a spirited discussion about what restaurant is the best in town. Honestly, I have traveled. I have protested. I have done it. I ..read more

I slept in this morning thinking that it was Saturday. OOPS! Everyone in my family knows that I have therapy at noon. EVERYONE. It’s in the calendar. It happens every week. Did they wake me up when I was sleeping at 11:15? NOPE! Thank goodness my friend texted me at 11:20. I was out of time to basically do anything aside from change some important articles of clothing and dive out of the house. I also brushed my teeth. That’s it. My hair is scary. I made it to therapy though and then to the urgent care office. Apparently, I either have an abscesses tooth, (possible since it hurt yesterday, bu ..read more

I have a stupid toothache. I have been trying to get into the dentist for a freaking year. Every time I call to schedule, they are so booked that I cannot even get an appointment. Finally, I called the other day and got one for the end of June, but apparently I jinxed myself because yesterday my tooth started hurting. Fantastic. The problem is I have state medical coverage and no dentist takes it. I have very limited access to dentists. There are only two places that I’m aware of that take it, and of course everyone that has state coverage goes there, so they are swamped. The one place used t ..read more

So I’m all cozy about ready to head off to sleepy land when my friend who has been in the hospital for a week calls me and says they are discharging her today. Thankfully, our mutual friend is at the hospital and can bring her to my house because I am not allowed to drive today. Still, I had just started to wash her pajamas and I hadn’t washed her sheets. It’s been a week. So I quickly remade her bed with some other stuff I had and I have the pajamas she had at the hospital that I picked up yesterday in the dryer. I’m still trying to shake the anesthesia fog on top of all of this. I really ju ..read more

When is the last time you took a risk? How did it work out? This morning I had an endoscopic ultrasound. The doctor wanted to do it because I have had pancreatitis so many times. I have had one done before, and nothing bad happened then, but not with this doctor. I had not met this doctor before the procedure, (except this morning right before), and it does carry a small risk of perforation etc. It turns out, he’s a great doctor and he didn’t find anything clinically significant, so I am relieved. I don’t have signs of chronic pancreatitis yet, which is a blessing. Given the number of times ..read more

My psych cut my antidepressant in half and I started the new dose on Monday. The antidepressant I’m on has a 60+ hour half-life so I won’t notice a difference, (if I notice one), for a few days, but I’m honestly just kind of terrified. We did it to lessen the chance of the med causing me pancreatic problems. I get it. At the same time, I can’t help but be horrified at the idea of the depression coming back. Sigh. I don’t think she understood me on the phone when I said that. She thought that my quality of life was really disrupted by going to the hospital all of the time. She’s not wrong, but ..read more

Describe a risk you took that you do not regret. I was not really bullied through school. I had a lot of friends and was part of several social groups, including the “popular” kids in retrospect. I also didn’t struggle academically. School was easy, if not terribly boring. I just hated it. By the time I got to high school, I was completely over it. I did everything I could to not go and was not there more than I was there. Looking back, I think there are a lot of reasons for this: Undiagnosed ADHD, depression as part of bipolar disorder, (well mania too), and massive anxiety to name a few ..read more

I have a cardiology appointment this afternoon. It’s kind of a “just in case” one year follow up. I see him because I had some palpitations a few years ago and because I have a family history of people keeling over at young ages from heart attacks. It’s best just to stay in touch. This appointment will take about five minutes. He will probably tell me he doesn’t need to see me after this appointment. I don’t know. We’ll see. I did have one chest x-ray that said something strange about my heart so I want to ask him about that. Other than that, I’m good. I need to exercise and eat better. Duh ..read more

How do you unwind after a demanding day? Okay. Not super proud of this, but my big way of relaxing and trying to unwind involves my (nicotine) vape and just chilling. I gave up cigarettes a couple of years ago and transitioned to a vape thinking that would help me quit. It did get me off cigarettes, so that’s an improvement I guess, but I really want to give up the vape too. Right now however, it’s an integral part of how I chill from the stressful days of caretaking I’ve had lately. So yeah. Image from Pexels ..read more

How do you use social media? I use social media, like most of my gen x peers, to connect to friends and family and bridge the communication gap that would otherwise exist due to time constraints and/or distance. I definitely do not use it to make political points. I don’t think my stance on abortion or lgbtq+ rights or any political party or affiliation is going to sway anyone. I’m not friends with people who are easily swayed by a fb post. I’d also hate to lose a friend just because they have a different lens than mine. I’ve learned, through years of engagement, that almost everyone wants ..read more