As I type this article, I’m in my pajamas and a sweatshirt, sniffling and sneezing from a cold I picked up on my flight home from Greece last weekend. This cold packed more of a punch than usual – I’ve had to lie down in bed between client sessions this week (good thing I do almost all my coaching work online!) so I could have the energy to support my clients as best I can. I’m not gonna lie: it’s not been pleasant. But in between sneezes, blowing my nose, dealing with the fountains flowing from my eyes, and the aches and tiredness that have been my companion the past few days, I’ve marveled ..read more

Over the past week, many clients have asked me how I feel about New Year's Resolutions. I personally haven't made them for a few years now, but my feeling is that if you feel drawn to doing them, do them! If not, don’t. No one should feel obligated to do them just because it's the "thing" everyone else does in January. But if you are someone who felt inspired to set some resolutions for the new year, here are a couple of questions to reflect on that I’ve noticed help people have more success with not just their resolutions, but their goals in general: 1. Do you actually want to do it? This mi ..read more

The other day, a client and I were talking about an upcoming audition she has. She mentioned that she was feeling pretty negative about it and that she was struggling to find a positive mindset about the audition. My reply took her by surprise: "Why do you think you need to feel positive about the audition?" I hear some of you now: "WTF are you on, Nicholas?! I thought you were pretty crazy already, but now you've really gone off your rocker! Um, why would I need to feel positive about an audition?! Duh, isn't that obvious??" And you know what, that's fair. I used to think exactly like you. A ..read more

I had a beautiful conversation with an "influencer" the other day.⠀ ⠀ She's a super cool woman with a huge heart and big dreams she wants to bring into the world. As we finished our chat, she said:⠀ ⠀ "You're the first coach I've talked to who didn't spend the whole time talking to me about strategies. I appreciate that!"⠀ ⠀ Wait. Aren't coaches supposed to help people formulate plans? Give them tangible tools to achieve their goals?⠀ ⠀ Some coaches do that. But there's a WAY more valuable conversation, IMHO.⠀ ⠀ I'm more interested in helping people awaken to the creative aliveness they're ma ..read more

A few years ago, I read a mind-blowing study from evolutionary psychologist David Buss. In the study, he asked a group a simple question: "Have you ever fantasized about killing someone?"⠀ ⠀ The results? 91% of men and 84% of women said they had. Crazy, right?⠀ ⠀ Wait, does that mean 91% of men and 84% of women are murderers?! Should we lock them all up in jail right now to prevent them from carrying out their fantasies? ⠀ ⠀ Of course not. Having the thought doesn't mean you're a murderer at your core.⠀ ⠀ But how often do we think stuff about ourselves and go, "Yup, that must be who I am and ..read more

In case the photo got you worried, no, this isn't an ode to deodorant...⠀ ⠀ It's an ode to Here and Now.⠀ ⠀ There's no better place, methinks. It's the only place we can be, actually. Because Now is all there really is!⠀ ⠀ I think we often underestimate the awesomeness of Now. We think our power and security lie everywhere *but* Now: Understanding our past or knowing what's going to happen in the future.⠀ ⠀ But here's the problem: The past doesn't exist outside of thought. Five seconds ago is as over as Ancient Rome. We aren't our past. We are Now.⠀ ⠀ And the future? Fantasy Island. At best ..read more

This quote hit me in a new way today...⠀ ⠀ In my former performer life, I often reflected on what factors distinguished a student/ “young artist" from an "emerged" artist. While you could certainly argue for many factors, I noticed one common theme:⠀ ⠀ Artists fully owned and expressed the choices that felt authentic to them regardless of what others thought. Students and young artists were often more concerned with replicating what their teachers, coaches, and others told them was the "right" artistic choice.⠀ ⠀ I remember as a young artist, I constantly felt like I needed permission to play ..read more

Have you ever lost your phone? For the life of you, you can't remember where you left it. So you rack your brain, retrace your steps, and think hard. At a certain point, you can't think of anywhere else it could possibly be. Frustrated, you give up trying to figure it out. And in that space of surrender, a new, fresh thought appears, as if out of the blue: "Hey, remember you stopped in that other room first?" OMG, that's right, you did! And there's your phone. Many people I know feel like they've lost their bearings. That the world has fallen out from under their feet, and they don't know how ..read more

You know that popular self-help phrase, “Do something every day that scares you”? I heard something even better recently. If you know me well, you know I tend to roll my eyes at most things marketing/sales. The way most people approach it is just not my vibe. But a marketing expert wrote something a few months ago that hit me like a ton of bricks. It was about blogging, but I saw even bigger implications: “Write about the stuff you think will scare your audience away.” It hit me hard because I realized how scared I was of scaring others away. I remember in the opening scene of the series “The ..read more

Does that quote resonate with you? One of my "talents" (in quotes because I'm not always sure it's a good thing!) is modeling other people. As a young singer, I remember easily and fervently copying the sound of my hero baritones.⠀ ⠀ When I started out as a hypnotherapist, my work was a dead ringer for one of my hypnosis teachers, Melissa Tiers. When I first changed directions in my coaching work, I did a solid impersonation of my main mentor, Michael Neill for awhile.⠀ ⠀ Part of it was simply not knowing what the hell I was doing! But mostly, I didn't think I was enough to stand on my own me ..read more