It’s been a couple of months since I’ve published a new blog post. It’s not for a lack of things to write about. I just haven’t been able to clearly articulate what I’m going through. Andy and I found out in February (6 months after losing Jensen) that I am pregnant with our second child – our rainbow baby – a girl we have named Madeline.  We are due in October. For those who haven’t heard this term before, a “rainbow baby” is a baby that is born following a miscarriage, stillbirth, neonatal death or infant loss. In the real world, a beautiful and bright rainbow follows a storm (i.e ..read more

When our son Jensen was diagnosed with Down syndrome (Ds), our first reaction was of sadness and disappointment.  I remember finding out at work on a late Wednesday afternoon. I was 20 weeks pregnant and the doctor called me to tell me the results of my genetic testing. I quickly packed up my belongings, and left the building in tears. I didn’t go into work the following Thursday or Friday.  Those first few days I was distraught and couldn’t stop crying. When I look back at this time, I am trying to discern what exactly was at the root of these feelings. If I’m be ..read more

We are less than one month away from kicking off our 321 mile adventure!  We will be hosting our kickoff event on World Down Syndrome Day, March 21st, with our partner, the Down Syndrome Guild of Southeast Michigan, at Drake Sports Park located in West Bloomfield, Michigan at 5:30 p.m. And YOU are invited to join us!  We will be walking two miles.  Mile #1 will be for Parker – our first friend who allowed us to dedicate a mile to him! Mile #2 will be dedicated to Chelsea Werner, a 4X Special Olympics Champion & a 2 X World Champion. The kickoff event is posted he ..read more

I believe in the power of kindness. Whether you are on the receiving end of a random act of kindness or you are a witness to it, it can inspire you to do the same for others, or it can simply help your own heart. Paying this type of behavior forward causes a ripple effect amongst our social networks, and across the world. This may sound idealistic and lofty to some.  But I think it sounds lofty only because it is incredibly difficult to measure the impact that one an act of kindness has on a person and the ripple effect it can c ..read more

Grief – an exhausting, unwelcome beast of an emotion. But let’s be honest – it’s more than an emotion.  An emotion is something like feeling “sad” or “melancholy.” Grief is something much more profound.  It’s something that never leaves you.  It is a soul-crushing, all-pervasive presence that sucks the life out of you. It is an unbearable pain that has the power to break your heart and take your life.  I mean this in the most figurative sense, but also in the literal sense (Google: Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds). Grief has now become ..read more

I was 17 weeks pregnant with my first child when I received a call from my doctor’s colleague, Dr. London (my doctor was out of town).  He told me very gently that my prenatal quad screening test came back with a 1 in 21 chance that my baby had Down syndrome (Ds), otherwise known as Trisomy 21.  It felt like my world had come crashing down. My heart was beating fast and I started to shake.  I tried not to let him hear me cry as I listened to what he had to tell me. He told me it was important to note that this was not a dia ..read more

We are excited to introduce our 321 Miles for 321 Smiles project! On 3.21.2017, in recognition of World Down Syndrome Day, we will begin a 321 mile journey with a very special purpose –  to promote awareness about Down syndrome (Ds).  We are calling our journey 321 Miles for 321 Smiles! We will be walking, hiking and/or running 321 miles.  Each mile that we traverse will be dedicated to a person who has Down syndrome. Each individual with Down syndrome will have his/her photo  featured on our blog along with the reasons that make him/her smile. Our goal is to ..read more

The Year 2016 is a paradox for us. It was the best year of our lives, and yet, it was the worst year of our lives. It will forever be etched into the history book of life for Andy and I.  It contains many life altering moments – good and bad.  I find myself reliving these moments and reflecting on how very quickly your life can change. When we entered 2016, I can honestly say I was the happiest I had been in my life. I was pregnant with our first child.  I was going to be a mother and Andy was going to be a father. By Christmas, Andy and ..read more

remembrance[ri-mem-bruh ns] noun 1. a retained mental impression; memory. 2. the act or fact of remembering. 3. the power or faculty of remembering. 4. the length of time over which recollection or memory extends. 5. the state of being remembered; commemoration 6. something that serves to bring to mind or keep in mind some place,person, event, etc. 7. a gift given as a token of love or friendship We had visions of what this Christmas would look like for us.  But, a piece of our hearts and souls is missing during a time of year that is usually very joyou ..read more

  The Angel Tree is complete. When I started out with the idea of the Angel Tree, I wasn’t sure how many parents would allow me to honor their child.  There are 140 baby names on this tree.  I am so happy (is that the right word?) to do this in memory of their children during this holiday season.  Yet when I stand back and look at this tree, and look at each unique ornament, I will admit – I get overcome with overwhelming sadness. All of these babies – gone.  All of these parents – devastated.  Hopes and dreams utterly crushed.  For me, knowing tha ..read more