Japan’s Olympics Minister Seiko Hashimoto will keep her mouth shut in upcoming discussions in preparation for the Tokyo 2021 Olympics. “I promise to stay silent and pour drinks for my male counterparts,” she told reporters. “It has to be a safe and secure games and that can only be achieved through the collective minds of […] The post Chief Of Tokyo Olympic Committee Promises To Keep Quiet During Meetings appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

Local customers at a bank in Kanagawa Prefecture today have collectively held their breaths after a foreigner turned to ask them if they could assist in processing a transaction using the ATM. Ryan Smith attempted to complete a furikomi on his own but soon realised it just wasn’t going to work out. “Oh my gaa, […] The post Locals Gasp After Gaijin Turns Around To Ask For Help With ATM appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

The coronavirus in Tokyo is currently working overtime until 8pm in Tokyo, Chiba, Saitama and Kanagawa. “At least we can clock off once it hits 8pm.” Coronavirus in the Kansai region is still being overworked with some leaders now calling for a state of emergency in Osaka and its surrounding prefectures. “We are working most […] The post Coronavirus In Tokyo Working Overtime Until 8pm appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga on Thursday effectively declared a Gaijin State of Emergency in Tokyo, Kanagawa, Saitama and Chiba prefectures to curb the spread of COVID-19 by ordering restaurants to close a few hours earlier than usual. “This is a frickin’ emergency alright – you’re telling me I can’t get a 400-yen pizza or 100-yen […] The post Gaijin State Of Emergency: No Saizeriya After 8pm appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

A 43-year-old male has become infected with coronavirus while asking higher powers to grant him and his family good health for the coming year. Mure Kiken visited a shrine in Tokyo on Saturday with his wife and two children to cash in on some spiritual kickbacks after a tumultuous 2020. Kiken prayed to God for […] The post Man In Crowd Praying For Good Health Contracts COVID-19 appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

The Japanese government has identified a splurge in KFC eating during the Christmas period as the root cause of a sharp spike in the number of COVID-19 cases throughout Japan over the past few days. “We have traced a large majority of the new cases to numerous KFC outlets,” Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga told reporters […] The post Rise In COVID-19 Due To “Increased Consumption Of Western KFC Food Over Christmas” appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

Japan has launched the “Yabai! Go Back!” campaign in an attempt to prevent the further spread of COVID-19 across the country. The “Go To” campaign encouraging citizens to travel around the country surprisingly resulted in accelerating the spread of the disease. “We thought if we had a catchy slogan such as ‘Go To’ this would […] The post Japan Launches “Go Back!” Campaign appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

The number of ‘atsui ne’s verbalized today reached a year high peak in the Kanto region. The average number of ‘atsui ne’s per Tokyo resident reached above seven at around 10:20 a.m. The ‘atsui ne’ phenomenon – closely related to the ‘samui ne’ phenomenon – of stating the obvious does very little to relieve the speaker […] The post Tokyo Reaches ‘Atsui Ne’ Yearly Peak appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

Tokyo Olympics officials are furious the Tokyo Olympics design has been affected by the coronavirus. Tokyo spokesman Tasa Makaya said in a conference on Tuesday, “Iyada!” Makaya told reporters Japan “doesn’t do satire” and the new coronavirus design should be banned. “We’ve been through enough this year, we’ve now got foreign humour infecting our society.” […] The post New Tokyo Olympics Design Released appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more

The mayor of Osaka has suggested men could cook a lot quicker than women at current recorded speeds of wives knocking up meals for their husbands. “You know, if men are forced to wait much longer than we already are, we may have to start getting our wives to order takeaway for us,” Osaka Mayor […] The post Osaka Mayor Accuses Women Of Taking Too Long To Cook Dinner For Husbands appeared first on The Rising Wasabi ..read more