Joke Dumpster Blog Post
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
4d ago
  Is it worth it? Yeah that’s right. It’s a Joke Dumpster Blog Post. A misfit collection of jokes & thoughts–some I have–and some I haven’t got around to posting elsewhere. Call it an early spring cleaning of my writing  journal. Enjoy!…   SENSEI SHOPPING Police in Washington state say a man wielding a samurai sword & threatening to hurt people was arrested after he entered a Walmart. Said store manager “Welcome to Tuesday.” *     *     *     *     * TICKET PLEASE After recent lows, share’s of AMC Theatre stock ..read more
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F & O
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
1w ago
  Are you “F & O?” It gets to ya.  Building, building, building.  More & more. Till you are at your wits end. F & O.  Frustrated and Overwhelmed. I’m there.  Often. And, as I age, that once comfortable ledge has become more & more narrow.   The strangest things get me F & O’d.  Opening a bag of chips.  A box of cereal.  A pill container.  Toilet Bowl cleanser.  A freakin bottle of water.  Driving in traffic.  Sitting in traffic.  Walking on snow & ice.  Large crowds of people.  Noise.  ..read more
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Time Warp
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
3w ago
  Whoa, we just celebrated the New Year but is this really 2024? Or did we somehow enter a time warp vortex and are back in the 1990’s…when ‘Seinfeld’ was the most watched TV show…the Yugo was the most joked about automobile…and Hooters was a popular, eye-popping restaurant? Today, ‘Seinfeld’ still hangs around in reruns.  Yugo’s have all but rusted out.  And Hooters shamed itself to obscurity. We have all moved on, right? Build it big!   But alas there is an upstart restaurant chain trying to relive the cleavage popularity of days gone by. It’s called “Twin Peaks” and they ..read more
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More Things
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
1M ago
  The list of lists. I am sure you have seen this list of often heard gaffs…things not to say to someone with Multiple Sclerosis. You have probably heard a few yourself first-hand. These swallowable snippets are oft-uttered by someone trying to relate.  To make conversation.  And fail miserably. Hey it happens.  We’re humans.  We just don’t know when to keep our yap shut.  Paste a smile on our puss and smile appropriately.   But wait there’s more!     In my years with the dreaded ick, I’ve thought the above list was rather short. So I penned a few o ..read more
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Stop It
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
2M ago
  Letting off some steam. All right, just stop it. We have put up with this shit for some time now-so it has come time to cease. You’ve had your little fun…got it out of your system.  But it is best to quit with the games.  Hang it up.  And bury it. I’m talking about things that currently annoy me.  Grating my nerves.  Edging me closer to an insanity plea. So in no particular order…Stop it.  Please…   Driving with a huge smile on TV commercials.   Who smiles while driving? I’m too busy cursing & flipping the bird. Glitter on greeting cards ..read more
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The Year In Pictures
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
2M ago
  A dim look at the past.   As 2023 winds down, it’s time for those mind-numbing retrospects of the past year we all try to forget. As high-brow as My Odd Sock may be, even I can’t resist a quick peek back at the campy pictures/photographs I have subjected you to seeing over the past twelve months. My deepest apologies. In no particular order–here are a few of my favs… From August- Caution: Dog Chasing Tail AheadFrom April- Curling iron & hair straightener were both on vanity. We will see what prevailed when she gets home.From August- My cooking sucks. Even the oven mit mocks me ..read more
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My Christmas Dilemma
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
2M ago
  SIt on my lap & tell me ALL about it. I suck at this. Sixty years of holiday experience and I still suck at this. Gift giving is what I am talking about. I am thee absolute worst gift giver EVER.     If I was one of the three wise men, only I could come up with a more inferior gift idea than myrrh, an embalming oil & symbol of death. Presenting my gift, baby Jesus would have said “Gee thanks, Doug” then rolled over to spew in his cradle. You see, I have no imagination what to give someone.  None.  Which is why my gifts always suck. Quite often my gifts never ..read more
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Whisper Soft
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
3M ago
Repeat that. We do exercises to strengthen our entire body.  From legs and arms, to bi’s and tri’s, to traps and lats.  Our gluts to our abs. Through the years of this nonsensical blog, I have offered up pointers to develop many of the near 700 muscles in yer bod.  Heck, I even showed you how to tighten the muscles of your grill (“Exercise Your Face Off” Nov 2013).   But there is one muscle/organ I have neglected…..the diaphragm. Looks like a moustache for your lungs.   This thin, little gem sits nestled below your lungs and just above your belly. Think of the diaphrag ..read more
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M-R-I’m Hungry
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
3M ago
  Enter at your own risk. It has happened.  Again. A routine MRI became a freak accident at a medical center in Redwood, California.  A nurse suffered crushing injuries when she was nearly swallowed whole by a MRI machine gone rogue. But this wasn’t the only occurence.   Just last month an inmate & prison guard become stuck to a MRI in Arizona. In 2019, a woman in Israel suffered the same tragic episode. While in 2018, a man died after being sucked into a MRI in India. These are just four examples I uncovered during my extensive research of page one in a Google search ..read more
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Be a Dog (Or a Cat)
My Odd Sock | A funny look at life with a limp.
by Doug Ankerman
4M ago
  I don’t bite. Good morning, sunshine. You have just woken.  Your sleepy eyes still meer slits as daylight peeks through the bedroom windows. Now before you throw over the blankets and put your feet on the floor–do yourself a favor. Take five minutes, while still in bed…..and be a dog (or a cat)!   Ahhhhh.   Dogs (and cats) don’t just barrel out of bed to begin their day.  And neither should you. Dogs (and cats) rise slowly, with gentle stretching.  Working out the kinks.  A night’s stiffness brought on by a long slumber.   That feels better! YOU are no ..read more
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