Each of us has unique strengths and talents and we are also uniquely challenged. What is hard for one is easy for another and vice versa. Do any of the following issues stand in the way of your happiness? Are you: Lacking in self-belief This will always undermine you and stop you feeling happy. If you can’t demonstrate inner conviction then you will lose your self-respect and this leads into a deeply negative place. Focusing on your insecurities only makes them seem bigger and more important. What to do Tackle your negative beliefs head on. Simply stop taking any notice of that self-critical ..read more

After all the years that I have worked in personal development, searching for practices and strategies that work to increase wellbeing and happiness, I still value one practice above all others. For me, forgiveness is the most vibrant and life-changing procedure, it never fails to lift the spirits and lighten our lives and touch our hearts with love; it moves negative energy faster than any technique I know and it brings with it the wonderful gifts of peace, calm, balance and compassion. People often react strongly to the concept of forgiveness, feeling that they have a right to hold on to th ..read more

1 Negative thinking. You know that this is always bad news. As soon as you indulge in this you lose your calm self-assuredness and begin to sound like a loser, not a good image! When you catch yourself wallowing around in the negative cycle of defeat just ask yourself, ‘Do I really want to be in this state? Am I sounding and looking good.’ This should be enough to zap you out of your pessimistic mind-set. Your thoughts are only as real as the energy you give to them. Get positive, get charismatic, get happy and get a life! 2 Blaming others. This really puts people off you as well as cutting y ..read more

Frankly, many women we know find it easier to relocate to another state, switch careers, or run a marathon than get the right man to marry them! If this sounds like you, then you need The Rules! What are The Rules? They are a simple way of acting around men that can help any woman win the heart of the man of her dreams. Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider authors of The Rules The ‘Good Wife’s Guide’ Extracted from an article in the magazine Housekeeping Monthly May 1955. • Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a wa ..read more

You really can change the way you feel! If your mood needs lightening and brightening then just try the following tips and strategies to discover a fresh, new, optimistic and upbeat outlook. Step 1 Expect success Sometimes an immediate change in attitude is all it takes to turn a negative pessimistic feeling into a positive and optimistic one. • Next time you find yourself visualizing the worst possible outcome become aware of what you are doing and then stop yourself, just refuse to go there. • Imagine the very best scenario and visualize that instead. See it happening and make it all as rea ..read more

A useful exercise to help you to smoke out the type of thoughts, behaviours and actions which build your self-esteem. It might also point out where you are sabotaging your confidence levels. There are no scores here; this is a process of reflection that might reveal some new and useful insights. Would love to hear your comments! 1 When I am feeling high in self-esteem I …………………………… 2 Self-doubt makes me………………………………………………. 3 My self-worth is high when………………………………………… 4 I feel like a success when…………………………………………… 5 I am at my best in relationships when……………………………… 6 I lose confidence in myself ..read more

‘Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.’ Goethe What do you think is the difference between those who are (or who act as) losers and those who are winners? It has nothing to do with luck and everything to do with attitude and approach. It’s not what you do that counts but rather how you do it. Confident people communicate differently and this is their defining feature. Go out and listen for victims. Notice the tone of voice as well as the actual words used – can you hear that ‘poor me’ whine? Now listen for non-victims – what differences ..read more

Cast your mind back to the last time you were faced with a group of strangers, perhaps at a party, a work-training event or a job interview. Faced with the unknown our adrenaline starts rushing and our behaviour can become erratic. The person who can survive the pressure is the one who has high self-esteem and feels free to be herself. You know only too well how it feels to turn up to such a group event feeling nervous and low in confidence: everyone else seems so much more together don’t they? The truth is that everyone feels intimidated sometimes in their lives but the person who survives s ..read more

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